Hey B.,
First of all, hang in there! I'm sure you're very frustrated by this happening, but you'll get through it! I would keep sraying the clothes as soon as you can, but when you put them in the wash, it's very helpful to set the load to "pre-soak" for as long as possible before the actual washing time begins (my washer has 15 & 30 min pre-soak settings on it & I have to use the 30 min one to get my 3yr olds clothes clean from pre-school!).
For the carpet....a carpet cleaning company recommended this to me & it really does work....use soda water. Not seltzer or club soda, but soda water...I use one made by Canada Dry...it takes the discoloration out but doesn't bleach the carpet. Pour a little on the stain and blot with a clean, white paper towel, etc.
I would also ask your pediatrician why your daughter is having so much unexpected poop...it could be something from your diet coming thru the breastmilk that's causing it and if you reduce or eliminate it from your diet that might reduce the pooping problem.
Hope that helps & take care!,
K.