Spending Quality Time with Daughter

I think that my seven year old would be pleased as punch with that. She is at the age now where she loves me but wants a little distance. For instance, I am coaching her (9 year old) sister's soccer team, but she wants nothing to do with me coaching her. She would like for me to just spend little kid time with her, but also wants to use my phone to call her friends.
Don't worry-she can never get enough love from other family members. In fact I tell the parents on my team the best thing they can do is tell their child SIMPLY that they LOVE to watch them play and invite as many friends and family members as possible because a child can never have enough cheerleaders!

The average time we spend focusing on one kiddo is about 20 minutes per day. That includes telling them to get up, get ready for school, etc...

So you're far above average. There's also no way I'm going to play toys with the kids. Just not my thing. Your kids will have these memories the rest of their lives.

Many children get only a few minutes per day of uninterrupted time from a parent. An hour is great, if you're counting minutes.

Don't forget to add the time that you two are talking in the car and working on supper or house jobs together. Those can be good times, too, if you make them so.

You're not in competition with your daughter's grandparents. You're all giving this girl the love she needs to have.

An hour???? That is great.

I think between all the kids if they have a few minutes one on one they are lucky. There is a baby and 4 other little ones.

Quality time is a myth created by we women who parented in the 80's. We were so busy trying to carve out careers while raising families that we told ourselves that the little time we were spending with our children was ok because it was quality time.

The truth is that any time you spend with your children is important. You can have quality time together while cleaning or cooking. Practicing spelling words, setting the table together can be quality time. It's just being together, talking and most important listening that makes quality time.

You feel bad because she's not your only and you think she's getting less from you. In truth you've given her someone who will be there to share life experiences and hopefully grow to be an important part of her life. Someone who will be in her life after you and your husband aren't there any longer.

I guess what I'm trying to say is don't stress out about the amount of time. Time doesn't matter. It's making sure that your daughter knows that you are there for her and will listen to her issues, problems, and joys.

When my son was born my daughter who was 2 at the time would sometimes feel left out. We started doing Mommy and M days. Even if it was just for an hour or two, we would find something that we could do just the two of us. Sometimes we would go to the library or park, sometimes it was to run to the store (which she loved), sometimes it was crafts at home while Daddy took baby brother to see grandma. Sometimes we would take the whole afternoon or day and do something bigger like a day at our little zoo, a movie, or the bounce house. It was sometimes only once or twice a month, but it gave her something to look forward to. Four years later we still do it!

I think it is more than enough. I don't think many kids get individual, undivided parental attention for a solid hour a day. It is just usually not feasible.

You do not need to specifically block an hour out. Just being together is fine. She can help cook, etc etc. just go with the flow and do not waste precious time trying to figure out how much time you should spend with her. Just live life!

A child can never get enough loving. Why are you concerned about her getting too much love. Who in their right mind would deny a child being loved by many?

Do family things together. She's too young to really cook, but she can set the table with you, while talking about her day. She can add the vegetables you chop into the salad. She can help clear the table and load the dishwasher. You can sit together and fold laundry, while she matches the socks and folds easy things like her own underwear and pants. Homework counts as together time too. Sit with her during bath time, even if you have your checkbook and pay a few bills. You can sort the mail together, with her handling the recycling part or putting magazines in the magazine rack. I think the most important time is bedtime - read together even for just 15 minutes, and have some quiet talk right after lights out. Use your time in the car to good advantage too - it's a great time, especially as kids get older. They often talk when the parent is watching the road and it's easier for certain topics when there is no eye contact. Try to make sure she's not using your phone or a video game during these times. You'll probably find there's a lot more than 1 hour a day in there!

You are doing great together. In a year or so, you will begin changing what you are doing as she begins to enter puberty and the tween phase. So take full advantage of what you have now.

As others have said, you don't have to just block out a set amount of time which is nice you can just hang out and get the same thing. Kids just want to be around mom or dad and know that all is fine.

This past weekend we were at a Boy Scout Jamboree and one of the amateur radio members had his 3 year old out. She had a blast being with her dad and just hugging on him and know that it was cool to do so. He even said that it was nice to have his daughter out and about as he had not been able to do it as much due to his other job.

Whatever you do, don't beat up yourself and mark a calendar for a precise amount of time. Life does not go as the calendar goes.

the other S.

Quality over quantity. Sounds like you have quality time with her; that's more important than quantity.

My honest advice...stop worrying about the time. You sound like your doing just fine! And she can certainly cook with you. Especially if your doing something that requires measuring and mixing.