My 6 month old is really struggling with sleep. he will sleep as long as you hold him. As soon as my husband or I lay him down, he wakes up screaming. This happens day or night at home. He screams at daycare if the daycare lady is out of site. He will sleep there however. It is this blood-curdling cry that usually scares me it happens so quick. This has been going on for over a week now. Any suggestions for this tired,frusterated mom?
Suggestion seems to be let him cry it out. I have tried that, how long do I let him cry??
I am very grateful for all your advice. One thing I should have mentioned in my posting, was that I was not using blankets when he slept. I am scared to death of suffication as I lost my niece 6 years ago at the age of 6 weeks 2 days. Her death was determined SIDS/Suffication. (Long Story) At the time I had an infant as well and vowed to never use blankets on my babies. I do not know the correct age to begin using them, but last night this is what happened.
I took a blanket and cuddled/played with my son for about 20 minutes. When I noticed he was getting tired, I put him in his crib. He cried, but did not scream as he has been. After a few minutes I went into his room, put my hand on his belly and he instantly started laughing. I then left the room. He cried a few more seconds and then started babbling. He fell alseep!!!!! He did still get up three times to eat, but went right back to sleep. I guess he will be a blanket boy and I will have to get over my fear of giving him one. Thanks again for all your advice.
he may be like the warmth of being "cuddled". You could try putting the carseat carrier if you have one in his crib. Or bundling him really tight.
If he's starting to sit it maybe be harder. Crying it out is really only harder on you than him. but the more he's "catered" to the longer he'll try it. As he know if if he screams he'll get picked up.
try a stuffed animal for comfort....no don't let him cry ever and keep him in his own bed!!
First, check out what is happening at day care. I remember when my child was in dc that they would rock him to sleep in the crib (the crib was on rollers on a tile floor). That was a problem because I did not do that at home nor did I know they were doing it and since he spent 50 hours a week in dc I was the minority and the one who was doing it differently.
Second, are you missing the tired cues? Maybe you should try putting him down earlier. Reading to him while in the crib while sittig next to him. I had a daughter that would do this same thing for awhile. I would nurse her and then she would fall asleep but when I did the transfer she would wake and cry. I then got into the habit of transferring her to the crib and rubbing her stomach to get her back to sleep.
There is a life altering book called On Becoming Baby Wise, by Gary Ezzo and Robert Bucknam. It helped us so much especially with the sleep issues. If you have never read it please go get it today :) It answers so many questions and helps reassure you as a parent that letting them cry if you have to is ok. It is the one book I would recommend to every parent.
The other thing that this oculd be although he seems a little young for it is Night Terrors. I would ask a pediatrician about that issue but 6 months seems a little young for this problem.
Good luck!
H.
It sounds like he may be teething or going through a growth spurt. If you have changed his diet this could also be affecting him. I wouldn't let him cry it out he is too young. What worked best with my daugher was to nurse her to sleep laying down in our bed and then just let her sleep with us, or nurse to sleep then wait till she is really out (do the limp arm test)then ever so gently lay her down, sometimes the timing takes a little practice!
Good luck!
I am a co-sleeper with my infants, but have run into this with day naps, and what has always worked for me was to always use the same blankie, wrap them in it and then once they are laid down i would continue to pat thier backs until they fell asleep, and each time I did that I would cut back on how long I would pat them, and in time I would stop,.
I have also found that it tends to happen more when they are in growth spurt or teething so try giving some tylenol or ibuprohen about a half hour before he takes his nap or goes down for the night. Hope it helped and good luck.
Have you tried sleeping with whatever you wrap him in the night before so that it has your scent on it? This may make him feel more secure. Have you tried swaddling him? If he's not ill, not wet or poopy, and not hungry, it sounds like he's expressing his displeasure with being left, and he might just have to cry it out. He will keep crying until he figures out it doesn't get your immediate attention. I know it's hard to hear them crying when you know they are ok--I had to busy myself in the kitchen to make myself not go into my son's room when he went through this as a tiny baby!
It might be a good idea instead of holding him to pat his back (while he is in bed) until he goes to sleep, this way he doesn't have to change positions or be disturbed. One of the hardest things for me was trying to get my kids to sleep through the night. My husband had to hold me in bed and keep me from getting up to comfort the baby each time he cried. That is a natural mothers instinct. Right now the more you do this the more your baby is "conditioning" you. If it's at all possible, letting the baby just cry might be the best thing for it. If it continues though, there might be some health issues to check out. Maybe the pediatriacian would be the best person to talk to.
Read the book, "The Sleepeasy Solution" and follow its ideas and you will be thanking the authors for the rest of your life. Trust me on this one, we waited until my daughter was about 15 months old to stop the "rocking to sleep, wake up as soon as you put her down routine" and were about going crazy and then we found this book. It was hard but within 3 days she was sleeping like an angel, happier, and everything has gone well for over 6 months now. I hope you can try it, it is a wonderful book.
Everyone will have different advice for you, but the truth is that you know your baby best. What might work for some, won't work for you. My suggestion would be to not leave your son when he is upset in his room. If he is crying, he probably needs you. Personally I don't think it is bad for a baby to know that if they cry, you will help them. What you offer might be something else. My son (about the same age) recently became more and more demanding as we tried to put him down at night (we co-sleep). He would fuss and we would pat his back, then try swaddling him, and on and on. It happened slowly to where we would try so many things. I finally said enough is enough. So at the time we wanted him to go to sleep (and was about the time he always became tired) we turned off all the lights, laid him down on his back and put a blanket on him. When he fussed I offered him his binki. He'd take it, but then get upset and fuss more. I'd offer him the binki again. Sometimes I'd wait a few seconds before giving him the binki. He cried no more than when we were trying to do a slew of things for him. He went to sleep. A lot quicker this way as he was left in a sleeping position and not lifted and put back down and such. It took about 15 minutes and I didn't have to let him cry it out. I was there for him the whole time and was offering him his binki. This was about a week ago. Naps never were difficult, but they are even easier now as we don't have to pat his back. He doesn't fuss for naps or even bedtime now and we don't have to do anything. He just lies there like us until we all fall asleep. So listen to all of the advice, but do what you feel is best for your son.
My middle son did this. I could never lay him day! I found that the carseat worked! He slept in the carseat for his first few months of life! My youngest one would fall asleep in our arms and as soon as we laid him down he woke up. But with him I just had to wait longer for him to slip into a deeper sleep.
The car seat idea worked for us on my son, but with my daughter it didn't. For her, our pediatrician suggested that we put a heating pad in her bed for a while on low before we put her to bed. It will warm up the blankets. TAKE IT OUT before you lay your baby down. They feel the warmth and it's like they are still up against your body. It stays warm long enough for them to get comfortable in their laying position. Try both ideas and see if either work for you...they're free :)
Personally, I wouldn't let them "cry it out" unless that was a last resort....and then only for a few minutes and then console with your hand...don't pick them up. Then leave again, checking every few minutes to make sure they are ok.
It looks like you have had all the advice you need, but I thought I'd write anyway. My oldest did the same thing. He was sleeping fine until about 6 months, I was told it was a growth spurt. Anyway...it went on for months..I read a ton of books, but alas....the cure was crying it out. Some books said let them cry and don't go in, but I didn't have it in me so...I compromised. I started at 5 minutes, then went in then waited 10 minute...etc.... One book also suggested not to pick them up, so I didn't, I just rubbed his back. Believe it or not, the first night he cried for 45 minutes (add all the times I went in to comfort and increase time it was a long night), but by the 3rd night he was back to sleeping all night and now he is a great sleeper. I also did it early on with the other 2 and they are perfect sleepers too.
He also started to roll over to his stomach (a no,no for SIDS, which scared me to death) but the doctor assured me that if he could roll over and back on his own, he was fine. (The fact that I stopped going in to roll him back over also helped keep him sleeping through the night. :))
A little about me: I am a SAHM married 11 years with 3 children: 4,7,9
Hi J.!
I've seen a lot of questions pertaining to sleeping issues with young children and my suggestion is always a simple one that is safe and effective: Have you thought of trying AROMATHERAPY? (My mother-in-law teaches aromatherapy and I've learned a lot from her!) A nighttime massage with a lavender-chamomile blend (very good for children) would help calm him down and relax. Plus, it'll be soothing for you as well and a great bonding experiance!
There are multiple ways to apply essential oils (massage, baths, air diffusor) but the number one thing to focus on is finding a quality line of essential oils that are all natural, pure and free of "filler chemicals" which can sometimes aggravate sensitve people and possibly do more harm than good! (If you would like to know more about the line of essential oils my mother-in-law recommends to her massage therapy students, just send me an e-mail.)
Good luck with your little ones! :o)
E. T.
1000MomsClub.com
My daughter was the same way. I started putting her in her swing as it would sway from side to side and she would sleep wonderfully. It would allow me to get more sleep as well. I like the idea of something with your scent on it as well. Have you tried laying him down and then putting your hand on his stomach for a little while after you lay him down.
Hi J.,
I agree with the other mom. Maybe if you swaddled or bundled him up tighly that would help. Both of my boys, especially the first, loved to be swaddled tight. They would sleep so much better. He is 4 and still wants be to tuck in his sheets so he is all bundled in. This could also be a stage and he is learning that if he starts screaming you will come and get him. I personally would let him cry. He isn't going to hurt himself and he will learn to go to sleep on his own. I did this with my first and he only cried for a few minutes and went to sleep. Good luck.
Chris
