Son Using Bathroom in Pants.

Updated on October 19, 2006
T.S. asks from Ellenboro, NC
10 answers

My son is 6 and is recently using the bathroom in his pants (poo). When I ask him why he does it, he just says that he is "playing" and doesn't make it on time. It isn't like he is doing all of it in his pants, it's just a little, but the big problem is that he sits in it until I happen to notice the smell. It's gross and I'm not sure what to do. He has been potty trained since he was 2 and 1/2 and as I said this is new. I understand that he gets busy playing and can have an accident, but I think he's getting a little old for this. I have tried not letting him go outside to play after he gets cleaned up, but it doesn't seem to be working. Any advice is appreciated.

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So What Happened?

Thanks so much for all the advice, I guess I really need to be consistent with him. I hope it will work, I tend to give in to him a little more than I should. I'll keep you updated.

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M.G.

answers from Columbia on

Ms T.,

Some children do things for attention and this clearly seems like one of those things. Maybe it's that he thinks his friends aren't going to be there if he goes inside. And also if it is often loose he could have some GI issues, so keep an eye on him.

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H.C.

answers from Raleigh on

T.,
I also have a 6 year old boy and understand how intense and stubborn they can be. I am also a physical therapist with a specialization in neurology. Chances are that this is a behavioral/control issue. However, bowel incontinence is a red flag for spinal cord dysfunction. I would definitely take him to the pediatrician for a workup. Other symptoms could be bladder retention( unable to fully empty the bladder when urinating) or any feelings of numbness or tingling anywhere, but especially lower than the belly button. Pay close attention to his coordination and any increase in "clumsy" movements. Again, this is probably not the cause of his problems, but I recently had a friend who had these same symptoms in her kindergartener. It turned out that his spinal cord was tethered at the end and therefore could not grow with him. The fix was a relatively simple surgery to free up the cord and was a great success. Good luck! Please post results after you see your MD.

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R.S.

answers from Spartanburg on

I know exactly how you are feeling!! This may sound gross but it has worked for me twice. Make him wash his underwear out by hand.

My oldest daughter wet her pants once while she was sitting in the sand playing. She said she was too busy playing and didn't want to get up. We went straight home from daycare and straight to the bathroom. I mad her dunk them in the toilet to get all the sand out. She is 18 now and still remembers that. She says that is why she never wet her pants again.

Last week my youngest, 4 1/2, was at a playground and pooped in her pants. I told her on the way home what she was going to do. She really didn't believe me until we went straight to the bathroom. After she dunked them in the toilet a few minutes to get the biggest part off I made her scrubb the rest out in the bathroom sink. Then I made her clean the sink out. Later that night she promised she would never used the bathroom in her pants again, unless it was an accident.

Good luck!
R.

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M.L.

answers from Raleigh on

My son who is almost 6 also has this problem sometimes. We took him to his doctor and at that time they said part of his problem was that his intestine was full and he couldn't help having accidents we finally got that cleared and were good for a while. Then it started again. This time we gave him a calendar and put stickers on it when he has no accidents (he also has a bedwetting problem). We also got him goodnights and he was pretty embarassed about people knowing he got them so he improved drastically. I came to a conclusion about why he has so many potty problems. He went to daycare for a long time and was trained primarily there and I think the way they train them makes it difficult. Almost every parent I have talked to with the same problem agrees. The daycares put the kids on a schedule and tell them when to use the bathroom at an exact time. Then when the kids are "trained" they only know to go when they are told not when they feel like they have to. My son was confused when I asked him if it felt like he needed to pee so he said no, I bring him to the bathroom and he obviously had a full bladder.

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S.B.

answers from Huntsville on

My daughter had this problem begin last year (she was 6). It turns out she has encopresis. Here is a website about it. She has always been constipated, so we were surprised when this started happening. We never would have known that the constipation was the cause of it if we hadn't gotten it checked out. Good luck, I know it is very frustrating. http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/001570.htm

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J.W.

answers from Charlotte on

maybe he just wants attention try giving him some mommy & me time see if that works

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S.

answers from Spartanburg on

I know that it is not uncommon for children who potty train early to have accidents when they get older. Usually it would be to pee in his pants, but pooping is a little different. I could understand if he had diarrhea, but not on a regular basis. If he says that he just doesn't want to take time to go to the bathroom, you might want to try putting him in diapers again. I know that most people don't think embarrassing children works, but if he would be embarrassed by having to wear a diaper he might start making going to the potty a priority. you might also try taking away all play time until he starts going to the potty. Take TV, play time and basically he can only do very little when he is at home and he might decide that it is more important to get up and go potty when he needs to than lose all of his play time, not just after the fact of him going, but just being put on restriction until he proves that he can go and be responsible in that way. Also since he is 6 you might want to consider spanking him for going in his pants since he has a proven tract record of being able to go to the potty by himself then this could be an act of defiance and need harsher punishment. You know him best and can better gauge his behavior and actions. I do wish you the best.

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B.O.

answers from Raleigh on

We went through this with my son for a long time. The one thing that got him to stop was make him clean his clothes after the accident. My son gagged for about a week but after that no problems. Good Luck I know this can be a frustrating time.

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T.C.

answers from Gadsden on

My son is eight and last year he started pee peing in his pants. After he finally sat down and talk to me I found out that he was doing because something was really bothering him. My mom went through this with my sister and she had a medical problem. IT wouldn't hurt to check into it. He may be getting back up.

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K.O.

answers from Charleston on

I understand your pain. My four year old went threw that stage a few months ago. Nothing seemed to work. She spent a lot of time at home with me and we didnt have a lot of company so it seemed like it was no big deal to her. Then we had some family come out and stay with us. She did have a few accidents while they were here but knew that is was not pleasant and seemed to be very embarrassed. By the time they left she was over it. It was hard to see it upset her but positive peer pressure can still be positive. maybe if he has a few play dates it might encourage him to take time out to use the bathroom. good luck

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