Sleep Training 14 Month Old?

Updated on March 04, 2011
M.S. asks from Gaithersburg, MD
5 answers

Hello Ladies,

I have a 14 month old daughter. She used to sleep really well until she turned 1 when she got sick and we have had lots of issues since. I have been unable to find a "good time" to sleep train her since then due to getting over sickness, molars coming in, and another mild cold. I still nurse her before her nap and bedtime and she wakes up a lot at night but doesn't nurse every time.
So my questions are:
Had anyone done cry it out at this age? Is it too late? - She understands so much more than she did at 8 months when we trained her then. I am not particularly a fan of crying it out but it seemed to work for her when she was young pretty quickly. At this age I am worried she is going to really fight it.

Is anyone co-sleeping with their toddlers? If so, what do you do for naptimes? I dont have time to take naps with her so am worried we resort to co-sleeping at night, she wont sleep in the day on her own.

I am so confused! I really want to help her get to sleep on her own and not have her get up as often as she is getting up at night but am unsure where to begin. I also want to make sure that I set some good routines and habits in place so that as she gets older and more likely to fight naps, she won't struggle as much. I know my older one stopped taking naps at home around 2 1/2 years and I don't think she was ready to give it up yet. I have read many of the sleep books but there is such little information on slightly older babies/toddlers.

Thanks in advance for your help!

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More Answers

M.M.

answers from Chicago on

They older they get, the harder it is to train, since they have their own little minds.
I have done CIO with my 3yr countless times. Infant, then 17mos, then 23mos, then just recently at Christmas time.

It's always because we create a habit - path of least resistance - and then we have to undo it.
You can definitely do it at her age, and you may have to do it several more times as she continues to teethe and get sick.

For us, at his age, it's the only thing we can do. He needs to understand that temper tantrums do not get him what he wants...which is basically what's happening with the screaming at night for you. She cries,and you go. If you don't, she'll be mad, but she'll be fine.

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K.H.

answers from Richmond on

the let them cry it out routine was invented by some nit wit who didnt have kids, or they were deaf. that being said, co sleeping with your little one is reassuring for them, and means that you wont have to get up ten times a night to check on them. your doctor and other "experts" may frown on it, but, its not their child, and they dont have to get up with the child, now do they ?
K. h.

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M.P.

answers from Washington DC on

I don't know really, but I think she needs to learn to self-comfort to go to sleep. It may mean cuddling with a favorite toy or blanky, listening to soothing music or sucking a little on a bottle with water (nothing else because it will rot her teeth). I would try different things and see what works for her and talk to her about it. She understands a great deal at 14 months even if she can't yet express her feelings very well verbally. I think you have to find something that will help her comfort herself -- if you have her cry it out, she will find something to comfort herself on her own, which may be thumb-sucking, which isn't a very good option. I think co-sleeping -- as nice and easy as it is -- makes you the comforter. You will have her sleeping with you for a long time...

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J.R.

answers from Norfolk on

There is a will involved; please remember this.
My first had this difficulty, and we did have her cry it out, but did some toddlerease explaining. :) Came in once to reaffirm, but then let her cry it out to know that our will shall prevail and that this is for her good. It took maybe a week.
I understand the fear of their emotions at this age and such. However, you ARE the Mom. You have the control and you must be confident and consistent. I would find a healthy week- no colds, and do it.
I am all for co-sleeping, but you have to do what is right for the whole family... and her getting a good night's sleep seems good for everyone.
My older daughter, now 4, still takes naps and wants them. This, I think, may be a result of our consistency when she was a toddler in having a tight sleep schedule- being flexible of course- but all for HER own good.
*Remember also that our bodies NEED good sleep to have the cells and such repair themselves, growth, etc.
Happy Sleeping!

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P.W.

answers from Lexington on

We did a modified kind of cry it out when DS was a year old. After a full year of lacking sleep, I needed it just as much as he did. It took either 2 or 3 nights total and since then has been great.

We don't co-sleep at all, partly because the times we have (because of trips or whatever) the only one that gets any sleep at all is DS and partly because if I don't get sleep, I am not an effective mom or human really. He will come in to our room sometimes in the middle of the night, but if it's before about 5:30am back to his own bed he goes.

He was never a good napper, so I can't offer any help on that front.

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