My son has had problems sleeping through the night almost his whole little life. At 8 months we tried the cry it out method an it worked, he was sleeping from 7:15 until 6AM and not waking throughout the night. Then we went on vacation at 10 months and it hasn't been the same since; we're not getting sleep again and it's killing us! Right now he has a bit of a cold, so we've been letting him sleep with us, but he moves, tosses and turns, kicks, hits, etc. and we need to get him back to sleeping in his own room. Does anyone have any clues as to what we should try? The books neve tell you what to do if they revert to their old habbits, they always assume that their method works the second you try it and you will forever have good night's sleep.....yeah right!
It takes 3 days to make a new habit, and 7 to break a bad one. You need to be consistent for a week to get back on track. Good luck you will find sleep full night again soon!
J.,
You need to get him back into the habit of his own bed and sleeping. It won't happen overnight, but with enough consistancy it will. If he has a cold, give him a little night time cold medicine. Part of the problem sounds like his body got off track from vacation and hasn't gotten back to normal yet.
The cold medicine will help him sleep and he'll get back on schedule. If you keep letting him come in to sleep with you- he'll be harder and harder to get back to his own bed.
Good luck!
C.
We all go through this at some point - or many - throughout our kid's lives. My kids aren't the greatest sleepers, but we have found ways that seem to improve their sleeping habits.
Set a routine at night (as all the books say), but do something that relaxes you and your son. reading, singing, cuddling etc. Then stick to it. It will provide cues to your son that bedtime is coming. We have great luck with going to his room, putting the lights down, starting the sound machine and reading 3 books. Then I sing twinkle twinkle once and lie him down.
As you know, they will protest and cry. This is where you need to do what's comfortable for you. Cry it out or incrementally let him adjust by going in every 10 minutes to lie him down, rub his back and leave, your choice.
We were very consistent w/ my son and it works (19 mos now). My daughter, who is not three, we weren't as consistent and it was much harder on all of us to adjust! Getting this down by trial and error as to what works best for him would be great to do before he is in a big boy bed and can get out - like my 3 year old.
Good luck, and be patient with him and you. Follow you instincts as to what is right to try. Some find co-sleeping is best for them - others don't allow children to sleep with them. Whichever your choice, be consistent. That gives the child a clear expectation and comfort in his routine.
For what it's worth, what I did was simply to get up at night, take care of business but not make it fun or cuddle time, and put him back to bed. Usually. I enjoyed the cuddles too, but it was a thing of letting everyone get some sleep. Took some self-discipline, but it all worked out. At this age, he's starting to teeth. Get some gel teething rings and keep one in the freezer. They get cold without getting hard. This too will pass! Oh, a vaporizer will help too!
I would first make sure that there isn't something else interfering with his sleep - the cold could be part of it, but he also could be teething or even an ear infections (symptoms can mimic a cold, but there's pain and lying down can make it worse; if he's pulling on his ears or not over the cold soon, or if he gets a fever, call the doc). If its none of these, then it's the normal reversion kids go through whenever there's a big event.
You can start the same routine you used to get him to sleep through the night before. He's at a slightly different developmental stage than he was before, so it could be a bit harder (he's entering the age where the brain is growing and developing at massive rates, which can make life very interesting for everyone) But be patient. Kids do settle into their sleep routines eventually. Some kids (and adults for that matter) are naturally "good" sleepers and others are restless or light sleepers - I really don't think the "habits" you train them into before they're 2 make a big impact (rather, I think their tendencies can affect how parents get them into whatever habits they develop) All my kids basically started out the same - in my room and even in my bed until past 2 years old. One is a really deep sleeper and would sleep through a hurrican, the other 2 are lighter sleepers and come to my room occaisionally but go right back to bed after a hug. I think it's just their temperament (my hubby is a heavy sleeper, I sleep very lightly)
I recommend "Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child"
it helped me a lot with my daughter. We do the CIO method and it does have to be revisitted every now and again.
When my 9 month old was sick, he slept with us, too, and he did the same thing. Kicked, squirmed, the whold bit. Needless to say, I've never done THAT again. If your child has just a bit of a cold, there is no reason to put him in your bed! Get him back in that crib and start all over. Set a schedule for the whole day (eating, sleeping, playing), as well as a nighttime routine for bedtime. Wait 5 min or more before going in at night if he is crying. If he is screaming, well, that's a different story. I believe my daughter, who is 2 y.o. now, tested us at around 10 months, to see if she could get us to come in her room. It worked, until we wised up and rode it out. Parenting is tough sometimes, but remember, you are the parent! Kids need their sleep, and so do you. It is a phase, so be patient.
I only have one thing to say - Baby Wise!! Your baby is always fed, full and happy and very good sleepers! You can find the book or books if you choose at most bookstores or online. Good luck!
I can't recommend enough the "Good Night, Sleep Tight" book. It has taken us through the last three years of sleeping ups & downs. It is normal for them to revert back, especially after a holiday/disruption in the routine. Yes, it can be frustrating I know, but just think he was able to sleep through the night so he will probably get there again. Sleeping habits are so important at this age as they are set for life. Teaching him how to relax before bedtime is critical for him now & later on. My suggestion is to go to a trustworthy book & go back to the stage he is at now (the reverted stage) & maybe garner a few more ideas from this period that can help him and you move through the night together. Our daughter was sleeping through the night for nearly 8 months and then she started waking up 1-2x/night for the next six. It perplexed us, but we just met her where she was at & lived through it. I know he has a cold but a) you don't want it, & b) if he doesn't sleep well with you, all the more reason to have him in his own bed. Our daughter never slept as well when she was in our bed as when she was in her own. I know it is hard to remind yourself of this now, while you are sleep deprived & frustrated, but it will pass. Oh yeah, & the author of Good Night, Sleep Tight is Kim West.
P.S. It seems like the vacation was the impetus for change, but could it be some other change in his room? We realized that one of the reasons our daughter's sleep habits changed was because our neighbour's habits changed. They drove in their driveway around 4am & the headlights always woke her up. We didn't figure this out until I couldn't sleep one night & was on the computer at that time & saw the connection.
Kids are something else aren't they? I am convinced God made them cute for a VERY good reason. = ) They will revert back again and again on things you teach them. You have to do the same thing over and over. If the cry it out thing worked, do it again. My doctor told us that crying it out is fine and you just have to be sure you get it under control by 2 or they will have established a potential life-long habit of poor sleeping.
Good luck to you!
