Sleep Deprived Help!!!! - Auburn,IN

first she is getting used to waking up... like a pattern. you have to just shut the door and let her be.. leave a bottle of water in the crib and that's it.. don't go in... you can't .... after a few days she will start to sleep... are you giving her enough food at night.. make sure her belly is full... try some fruit and maybe a few cookies... give her a full drink in a sippy cup at night before bed... good luck

Time to start practicing ignoring bad behavior and praising good behavior. As to the night wakings, I'd just go in, say "it's bed time," and leave. Yes, she will scream. Yes, she will cry. But as long as you stay with her, she will play. I have friends with 2 year olds that still bother them for 2 hours in the middle of the night. If you want to get some sleep, you need to just say "it's time for sleep. GO TO BED." I do this with my 9 month old son and he only fusses for 30-60 seconds. If you pick them up, you teach them " if I do this, mom will keep me company, even if it's sleepy time."

The meltdowns are her attempts for attention. So, when she starts, walk into another room. Perfectly normal at her age, and it has nothing to do with the terrible twos. Every 3-6 months, starting at age 9 months, kids try to "put it on" for attention. Best thing to do is to ignore it.

I would make a trip to the pediatrician to be sure there is nothing like an ear infection going on

Time to stop catering to her. Let her play and cry in her crib - even if it means you getting ear plugs - harsh sounding I know but she'll get into this habit and rule the roost. You need to make sure she's fine and if all is fine, then stop giving in to her . The hitting and biting are signs of "I want to be in control and if I don't get my way I'll do something to make myself get my way." She's old enough to be spanked (bad word to some I know) but a small tap on the bottom is not going to damage her. YOU are the mom, she IS NOT in control here.

I'm SOO sorry! I know you're exhausted! My son is 18 mo old and went through phases of doing this. For him, his day time naps were too long and were causing a disruption in his night time sleep. I started to limit his morning and afternoon naps to about 1 hr and he went back to STTN. Nap when she naps during the day---you need it, it's ok if your house falls apart. Your husband can pick up the slack. And when he was up in the night, I also started laying on his floor w/a pillow and comforter so I could doze in and out while he did his thing--since he would scream if I left (even though he's been sleep trained for MONTHS). For my son ibuprofen works WAAY better than Tylenol.

And also, sounds like she's transitioning to one nap a day. I have slowly worked my way to a nap around 11:30 (rather than 10am after 6am wake up) and a short crib "rest" around 4. He often won't sleep at 4 but just lays around/hangs out for about 30 min. I need that 2nd break in the day too! We also started to have to go out EVERY day. Usually if we go out around 9-10 for an hour or so this helps him get thru his tired period better (if we don't go out, these tired periods are when the acting out starts) then have a snack when we get home followed by his 1 nap for the day is around 1.5-2 hrs.

Also, the new behavior can be related to her sleeplessness, but it's def not too early for gently discipline. That's exactly the age when my son started! I started telling my son in a very calm but stern voice, "we don't do that, please say sorry". And now, although he will still do things, he clearly knows that they're wrong and says "no, no" (as in "I know I'm not supposed to do this") or "uh oh" after he's done it. All I can ask for at this age is knowing the diff bet right and wrong even if he can't control his impulses. We also do 30 sec time outs after 3 warnings. And he really gets it. He knows what's happening. :)

Best of luck, be gentle with yourself and rest as much as you can. Easy dinners, husband help w/housework, TV help if you need a break--no kid ever became a criminal from an hour of Dora or Curious George! or even a paci all help to keep you sane which makes you a better mom! :)

Get Hyland's teething tablets. They are all-natural and homeopathic. There's actually no evidence that Tylonal or Motrin helps toddlers with pain - only fevers! Besides, lots of kids are affected by the dyes in common OTC meds which could be keeping her up.

If she's just awake and playing, leave her alone. If she's crying go in, as soon as she's not crying, put her down and leave. Do it over and over if you have to. It can take a few days, but as soon as she learns that 1) you will respond when she needs you and 2) you aren't there to spend time with her, she won't stay up. There's nothing wrong with compassionately responding to her needs. No one has to be "in control" at this age. You aren't her "keeper" you are her parent. Good parents guide their children, they don't dominate them.

I agree with the others, you're going to have to stop getting up with her. It starts simple, as you mentioned, and she goes back to sleep. But, she's entering that stage of separation anxiety and she's able to assert more control so she wants to do it all the time. She wants you around and she wants you to give her what she wants, totally normal, but you have to look at the big picture. Is it helping anyone to continually get up at night and disrupt everyone's sleep to get her milk in the middle of the night?? I don't think so. It is partly the terrible 2s...techincally the 2s start in the second year of life, which she's in, and yes it does have to do with her age, and it age appropriate, that's why they call it the terrible 2s. You're going to have to stay strong and stop getting up with her, bottom line.*

*if she's teething or sick, that all goes out the window and the schedule will change until that subsides. Sometimes it is really hard to tell if she's teething or what, so err on the side of caution for a day or two until you figure it out.

Hang in there
There could be many reasons that your child is responding the way she is. First of all, teething is painful and can interfere with sleep patterns. You need to be consistent in dealing with your toddler...easy for me to say...difficult to carry out. If you child is looking for attention, for whatever reason, pain, boredom, fears, etc....you need to try and sort out the problem. She can't communicate her emotions, fears, medical condition in simple words. I am glad you have taught her signs, I have included simple signs in my book "My Baby Compass, Birth to Two" for early expressive vocabulary. If you have eliminated any medical, including the teething, your toddler is at the age where she will be able to understand simple routines for play, eating, physically moving and sleeping. See if you can implement this into your routine and stick by it. If it is behavior that seems to be an issue. Give your toddler a choice between two objects or activities to give her "control" that is directed by you. Children have their own personality....as extroverts and introverts...direct that energy in a positive manner....it will pay off in the long run. Your toddler won't be 14 month forever and as you have found, it is a difficult job to do by yourself. Good luck K. Thorson Gruhn, Speech-Language Pathologist

I suggest that you ignore her when she wakes up. Allow her to find a way to self-soothe. Because she's pretty well trained you to get up and stay with her you may need to do the easing her into putting herself to sleep routine. Go in and be sure that she's not needing something. Change her diaper if that's a problem. Then leave. Go in and pat her back to let her know you are there but then leave after a minute or less. Do not turn on the light. Do not talk with her. Wait another 5-10 minutes and if she's till crying go in and repeat the "I'm here but I'm not picking you up" routine lengthening the amount of time in between visits.

Since she is teething, if it's time for another dose, give her that. What is important is for her to know night is for sleeping and you're not going to be "played" while still remaining calm and matter of fact.

You could trying putting a couple of soft toys in her crib. She can play but you're not going to be staying with her. Night is for sleeping.

I suggest that it's alright to let her cry once you've determined that she doesn't need anything. At 14 months she doesn't need to nurse. She may need another dose of ibuprofen or tylenol or her diaper changed or not. By spending time with her and saying no to her requests you are actually increasing her frustration to a higher level than if you just let her cry herself back to sleep.