Single Moms, Dating Moms, and Cheating Moms

I find this to be an odd post.

The single people I know are LOOKING for ways (safe ways) to meet potential mates.

And a young girl is far too often a magnet for a pedophile.

I can't imagine where or when this is happening with the frequency implied...

As for meeting the kid(s) -- I vote for only once you know this may, indeed, be a long term (marriage type) relationship.

.. Hmmm... make sure, that when you do get advances from Admirers ... that it is not because of your daughter/child with you.
I mean, gosh, nowadays, I have read that some men date a single Mom/woman... because she has a young child or kids... and then, well, that is their actual "target." They being a Predator.

I work in law enforcement and have come to believe I may be somewhat paranoid. It was comforting to read other mothers are also aware that women who appear single with a child may be targeted by pedophiles. I find this so true as most of us moms are in "mommy mode" when with our children and not flashing a "come hither" vibe. Please be careful.

Cheating moms? Are you serious or making a "joke"? Just wondering. Anyway, I'm married so don't acknowledge advances from anyone, whether my children are present or not. I just pretend not to hear them or look past them. When I was single I often had other people's kids with me, but I didn't acknowledge guys trying to talk to me then either. Not sure why, I just didn't.

If it is the first time they approach me and I have never seen them then I probably would do the same thing you did. I'm not worried about losing potential suitors either and having a daughter in particular I choose not to let a guy meet my child for a long while.

I may be overprotective, but how do I really know he didn't approach me because he saw my child? It happens and it's disgusting. Single women are far too often too trusting and let a pedophile into their life and think they know him and the child suffers. I wish the law would change in regards to pedophiles, but I won't say much more than that lol.

Anyways, even with the overprotectiveness aside, I choose not to expose my child to that or involve her in it especially when I have never met the guy before. Maybe it would be different if it was an hour wait in a doctor's office or Midas, but still probably wouldn't go much further than small talk.

Plus with the overprotectiveness put back in lol, I want to know his true colors (or try very very hard to) before he meets my child. People that I have met that already know my child seem to play a role trying to show me they would be the perfect dad in the future and I want to see who they are and how they handle things first if that makes sense. Plus I am way cautious about people around my child. But I am assuming your question is about guys hitting on ya when your with your child.

Well, I'm not single, dating, or cheating... but I get approached by men all the time and women occasionally.

I just talk to them. I enjoy people (although I'm an introvert, I'm not shy). I have no interest in dating but friendly banter or conversation is great. They just have as much priority to me as a cocker spaniel. If I'm somewhere with my son, he's 1st, and everything else is just background. In our area where most people just DON'T talk to other people unless they know them, they usually end up being Midwest or Back East transplants. Some testing the water for dates, most just being friendly. I've actually made quite a few friends, and far more acquaintances that way (haunt the same places and you tend to bump into the same people).

The people actively seeking dates are pretty easy to shuffle off (Gotta go/ etc.), and I only ever exchange email addresses/phone numbers with other parents if our kids are getting on like a house on fire... or if we BECOME good friends.

((My son and I do a lot of activities together. Snowboarding, sailing, etc. The kind of thing where you see a lot of the same people over and over. I've made great friends out of many people and do eventually exchange contact info. People often mistake me for a single mom in the beginning -because my husband is never around, and I don't wear my ring (bad marriage)- but a lot of those mistaken prowls become good 'See you Wednesday', 'How's the snow at Crystal?', 'Your mom pull through her surgery' kinds of friends/ acquaintances.))

But that's just who I am, single or married. I'm friendly. I like to talk. I like to get to know people. Anyone who spends 5 minutes of distracted conversation with me and considers it a waste of their time/ leading them on/ etc needs to rejoin the human race where you don't just talk to someone to get into their pants / seriously work with their therapist about their personality disorder.

I realize this is 'grain of salt' kind of sharing. Because I'm NOT dating or looking to date. And I've usually got the 'out' (married). The only reason why I am sharing is

- Cocker Spaniels (aka I can talk to people and give them as much of my attention as a passing puppy / not take away from my son/ not be flirting)

- Right to Human Contact. I firmly believe that married or single, that people are worth talking to and that doing so you owe them NOTHING. Anyone I talk to that thinks their conversation is so scintillating that I "owe" them for wasting their time isn't someone I'd want as a friend, much less want to date! I just don't value myself so lowly. Granted I have a bit of a double life as a college student and not-young-adult/ parent. I see soooooo many people (typically under 25) who immediately break off conversation and "shun" someone who is in a relationship with someone else on campus that it really blows my mind. Yeah. If I only talked with people I was interested in sleeping with, I'd me a mute! Fortunately, I've found in the 30+ crowd everyone talks to everyone. For purposes of passing the time/ human contact/ getting to know people with or without sexual intentions.

GOOD FOR YOU, for following your gut. My son sees me interact with people in a way that is natural for me, and your daughter is seeing you interact with people that is natural for you. Keep with it. Stay with your strengths and confidence level.

Ew, I'd be creeped out by a guy who hit on me in front of my kids! What, are these guys hanging around the park? outside preschool? at the toy aisle in Target?
GROSS, turn and run!!!

I find the title to this insulting with the cheating moms. No you should not take your kid out with you on a date. Do that mean you can't ever talk to a man with your child around .. your joking right? If you can't even talk to a guy around your child even normal chat thats not healthy..

Where in the world is this happening?? The park, school, the grocery store?? Don't know, no I know I wouldn't be interested in someone with bad judgement like that.

If a man hits on me with my kids present - I try to be as nice as possible and say - thanks - I'm happily married...or "I'll let my husband know!"

If a man hits on me in front of my kids - I really don't think he's a man I'd like to try and get to know better anyway...a little tacky...while I'm all for meeting new people...you can introduce yourself without a pick up line...NOT YOU - but a man...

I don't recall anyone ever hitting on me while my daughter was present. I did met people. I had no problem introducing myself and being friendly. But I never openly flirted with anyone. If you don't put out a "look at me, im single" vibe, noone would even know you were single to approach you. I'm in mom mode when my kids are around, so nothing about me says come hither. It does get more complicated once you've met someone nice and want to start dating. But I've never had a problem being approached around my kids.

i love the title, super funny, almost "PC" in it's broadness, cant leave anyone out!!! LOL, I am married so i would just ignore, but even if single i think i would do the same as you, just let them go by or say no thanks. pretty creepy to get hit on with your kids right there.

Cheating moms???? Well, I certainly hope they dont do that around their children! But I agree with you, its probably not a good idea to do it in front of the kids unless you are very discreet about it.

being that i am a single mom and have been for 3yrs....not active in seeking a boyfriend either...but if I am out with my son and the person who approaches me can see that I do not have a ring on my finger and makes advances, I wouldn't have a problem with it while my son is there. However, my son is priority. My attention to this individual would be very short and definitely not fully involved, as my eyes and ears will be 99.9% on my son.

If this fellow seems interesting and worth getting to know and I have a moment to spare...i will ask for his number. Then its my choice if I decide to go further with it.

I obviously would introduce my son if he asks. As everyone always make conversation with us due to my son (he is a overly hyper 3yr old who is just a ham to strangers. Everyone LOVES him...he is also very CUTE ;) so its hard to not introduce my son while we are out.

Now my son will never have a second chance to mingle with this fellow, as my son will only be involved with another man if the relationship is long term and serious. Don't trust anyone these days.

With the person making advances, he is going out on a huge limb really not knowing if your single or not. But to take notice in a mom with a child(ren), to me is flattering. Cause, i still got it, even after having my kid, lol :) Heck, he may find your parenting rock and see you as a potential. One never knows right?

Why shun it if it can lead into something wonderful? What if that person was your needle in the haystack? Don't know unless you take a chance. Only but only if this person catches your eye and makes his advances interesting and not ewwwww...typical male come ons! Those as the ones that catch my attention, of course, if i have a minute to look, haahaa