I am a single mother of 3 and the youngest is 4 months. Her dad and I have a negotiation meeting for child support on March 26 and I know they are going to ask the father if he wants the child to have his last name. Being the selfish person that he is, i'm sure he will say yes to be spiteful. I refuse to allow my daughter to have his last name!!! We were never married and never will be, matter of fact he is not legally divorced from a previous marriage eight years ago. How can I when this battle?? Any advice is helpful.
I had the same problem and after fighting back and forth the judge ordered it to be hyphenated, with my last name first and his last name last, it looks like Mary Johnson-Smith. The process was a pain in the a--, but so very worth it. It has made it easier at the school to have her recognized as my daughter. Legaly I use the hypen, but most of the time it's just my last name.
My youngest last name is hyphenated as well but my story is pretty confusing but I also use my last name first and rarely use his dad's especially because he NEVER even wanted my son to begin with and wasn't in the picture until he was about 6 months or so.
Good Luck and I hope this helps.
I know it's hard but you can do it:)
M.
comprise with a hyphenated name and only use the hyphenated name on legal papers. Everywhere else, just use your last name. Simple solution.
I am also a single mother and was concerned about my son having his father's last name (his father never came to the hospital even when our son was in NICU).
During our negotiation hearing, the hearing officer asked if my son's last name should be mine or his father's. I told the hearing officer it should be my name. His father didn't try to fight me (I'm glad because I cringe every time I see his name in his personal training ads). The hearing officer didn't press the issue because by then she was sick and tired of my son's father.
My cousin has a different experience. During her child support court hearing, her son's father didn't show up. One of the things that did come up was the child's last name. According to my cousin, the judge told her that her son's last name would have to be the same as the father's (it already was). That sounded strange to me, but I may have missed some details, so take that with a grain of salt.
I think it may depend on the judge or hearing officer.
You can not when that battle in court or with the Attorney General. Your best bet is to ask that the name be hypenated with your last name and his. Legally when your name is hyphenated you can use either name or both. That way you have changed the name but for school and other stuff you can use your last name solely. Hope this helps. Good luck
There is no reason that a child support officer would require you change the last name of the child. The hearing is simply to avoid going to costly,time-consuming court. It is a measure used to agree on any matters involving money...not time to discuss a last name. If you were never married to him (which you were not), there is no reason, legally that you would have to have a girl have his last name. That does not validate his paternity. In case you are wondering how I know what I told you: I went through a similar issue, and the judge declared it to be a frivolous request since she would grow up, get married and have it changed anyway.
My husband had this issue come up in court over his daughter by a previous relationship and the judge simply said..he is the child's father and her last name would be his. Although, my sister went to court and had her baby's name both hers and his, so I guess it is what you can get him to agree too.
