Should I Find Out Sex for Baby #3 (Already Have 2 Boys)??

How about you find out and then don't tell him? You'll have to refrain from buying gender specific items though.

I was *convinced* I was having a boy this time around. When I found out I am having a little girl I did feel disappointed (and also very grateful that she is healthy!). Here I am at term and I am really excited to be having another little girl. For me, finding out early gave me a chance to get used to the idea and start to like it.

do you open your presents before christmas morning?????
;)
khairete
S. (who fought to remain ignorant)

I truly believed my second child was a girl, because the pregnancy was radically different from my first. I was wrong, and I am so glad I found out at 20 weeks, rather than in the delivery room. It took me a few days to adjust. I, too, wanted the mother/daughter relationship and had gone quite far in imagining my life with this little girl. I completely adore my second son, and (obviously) wouldn't trade the opportunity to be his mom for the world. But I will be honest with you - I needed a few days to grieve the 'loss' of that little girl and the mother/daughter experiences I'd imagined we'd share. (we knew we were only having two kids) I am glad I found out, because once I was over it, I was able to fully embrace having another son, and was truly delighted at HIS arrival. To sum it up, I didn't want to have mixed feelings at the birth.

Plus, it makes the naming process so much easier!

Congratulations on your growing family - I wish you all the best!

I couldn't not find out. I don't like surprises.

From the sound of your post, I think you need to know.

Congratulations with baby #3!

You should wait. I had similar feelings with one of mine, and we inadvertently were told the sex at the u/s. It was not what I had wished for, apparently, and I spent a good portion of the rest of kthe pregnancy a little bummed that "he" was coming, instead of "she".
With the others, each time (except for one) I've had a preference, and each time, I have gotten the opposite that I thought I wanted. But, when you find out in the delivery room, and they are handing you the baby, instead of showing you a screen, the feeling is just different. Yeah, you might have the ever-most fleeting moment of, "darn", but you immediately fall in love. It's just different. Take it from me, I've done both ways. The disappointment is MUCH easier to take on birth day, than u/s day!

My husband and I had the same problem with my 3rd pregnancy. We had 2 wonderful daughters and I was carrying twins. I didn't ask about the first 2 and was happy with whatever gender came out but for some reason I just had to know with the twins. Of course there were ultrasounds every few weeks and I think that fed into the 'I GOT TO FIND OUT' voice screaming in my brain. My hubby didn't want to find out.

I usually went to appointments by myself so at an appointment 2 weeks before my due date they were able to see that the baby in perfect head down position waiting to come out was a boy. The other baby wasn't cooperating. Woohoo at least 1 boy. I didn't say a word to hubby until the first baby was delivered .... and it was a girl. "They said that one was a boy" I said in shock. Turned out that they must have flipped positions without my knowledge and the next one out was my son.

I'm too curious to wait to find out.
When I get a new book I often read the last page first.
I always like to know everything I can as soon as I can find out.
But that's me.
If you enjoy the suspense - then wait till you give birth to find out.

I have three boys. I chose not to find out for any of them. I knew that when I met them in person, they would be perfect. I didn't find out during the pregnancies because I never wanted to feel disappointment over one of my beautiful babies, even while pregnant. And I never did.

I have a stepson and three boys, then had a daughter last July. My husband did not want to find out with my daughter, I wanted to. I won that argument! I've always maintained that finding out at the ultrasound is just as much a surprise as finding out in the delivery room. There were a few reasons that I wanted to find out with my last.
First, she was my attempt at natural family planning, so she wasn't completely "planned" and I had already gotten rid of my baby stuff. I wanted gender specific items when I bought for her (as she is DEFINITELY the last) and so clearly, I needed to know.
Second, my sons (oldest in particular) were DYING for a sister. I wanted them to have time to prepare and get excited if it was another brother- which all of us assumed it would be.
Third, since she is my last (I had my tubes tied), I wanted to know. I love my boys dearly and wouldn't trade them for any girl, but I too, had always wanted to experience the mother/daughter bond that I have with my own mom. I needed to give myself time to mourn that relationship if it was another boy- I didn't want even a trace of disappointment in the delivery room.
I told my husband that I would find out and keep it a secret, but that I was not waiting. He decided to go with me and we both got a huge shock when they said it was a girl! It was a very special moment that I don't think I'll ever forget! Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

I wanted to know with all 3. Didn't care what I was getting but I wanted to know.
It made it easier to choose a name. It made it easier for me to decide how I wanted to decorate seeing as I hate that generic stuff is always either yellow or green, 2 colors I really dislike. I could refer to the baby either by name or he/she instead of ending up with "it" or "the baby" or whatever annoying generic things you come up with before baby is born.
My first 2 are boys, my third is a girl. I was certain it was another boy. I was so surprised when they told me she was a she!

There is no right or wrong here, so don't worry about that.

I have two boys, and I can only vaguely remember considering the possibility of having a girl. I mention that because once you know it's a boy or a girl, there's really no turning back. You said you were concerned that if you find out you're having a boy, you would "spend remaining 5 months with a sense of loss." I don't think that would be true. I really believe that you would spend the rest of your pregnancy dreaming about the boy or girl that will soon be joining your family.

When I found out I was pregnant with baby number two, I wanted to have a girl. One boy and one girl, right? At 20 weeks I found out I was having a boy. I have to admit, I was upset at first. I thought, "But I wanted a girl!" I look at is as a blessing. During the second half of the pregnancy I had the luxury of dreaming about my son. It didn't take me too long to start getting really excited about having another son and forget the idea of having a daughter.

Personally, I would want to know. My husband didn't want to know, but I did. So, I found out and didn't tell him. Now, he knew I knew, so I didn't lie to him. I just didn't tell him whether it was a boy or girl.

If you decide to find out, great. If not, that's ok, too. Either choice is perfectly fine. I don't like it when people make it sound like a moral decision. I also think the "surprise" argument is flawed. Yes, if you decide not to find out and wait for the birth you will be surprised. But if you decide to find out at 20 weeks, isn't it still a surprise?

We had this weird order.My 13 yr old was found out,9 yr old Surprise,2 yr old Found out and 19 day old was a surprise.

I would never find out the sex ahead of time. Why ruin the surprise!

Did you find out with the first two? If you found out with both, I think you should let your husband have his way this time and keep it a secret. If you've never found out before, he should let you choose this time around.

I had a boy first and we didn't find out. With my second pregnancy, we found out because, like you, I needed time to prepare myself if it was going to be another boy. I didn't want to be sad in the delivery room when my new baby arrived and I knew that, even if I was sad at the ultrasound, I'd be "over it" and thrilled by the time the baby was born. Luckily, I had a daughter.

I don't think you'll spend five months feeling loss if it's another boy. Maybe a few weeks, but then you'll start getting out the old clothes from your other sons and seeing your favorites, remembering them as infants, and you'll get excited to have another.

Default goes to whichever parent does NOT want to find out. Been there, done that. :-)

Find out! It will be fun for your kids to know too.

I have your exact some scenario. We waited for the surprise on the first two (both girls). And that was at husbands insistence. I wanted more time to do up the nursery. But the surprise was so worth it, even though all my newborn outfits were unisex and the nursery walls were white.
So for third baby hubby once again wanted the surprise. But we found out on my insistence this time. My reasons were a bit different than yours. I just needed to make space and know if it was time to move along bags and bags of little girls clothes or not, paint out the pink walls or not. And I wasn't going to pick out two sets of names again, that was way too much work for someone who hates the name picking process. So we found out and I'm glad. Its making my life easier. I don't think either one of us had strong gender preferences, but my daughter did, so I'm really glad she had time to adjust to the news of a baby brother. I think she cried about it the whole first week after finding out.
But if you know in advance that you are leaning towards a gender preference and this is your last baby then I say by all means find out and make your mental adjustments before baby comes. And its totally your turn to call this one. Your husband got his way the first two times.

I will tell you now, it's a boy!! J/k...kind of ;). I have three beautiful boys, but I have heard fable tales of those who have two of one gender and then the third is the other, it happens ;). I don't think you will feel a sense of loss though, seeing your baby in the big show is so exciting, seeing that nice developed spine, strong heart, fingers and toes is always a happy day :). I always wanted to know, so I totally understand you there, plus if it is a girl you could use the time before to get girl things and people will want to give you a shower for girl stuff! Sending you girlie thoughts!

I am always a fan of finding out. My sister's friend had two girls, and she "just knew" that her third would be a boy, so she didn't bother finding out. Guess what, it was another girl. It took her several months to get over it. I feel that was so not fair to that little baby, and it was unfair to the mom too. This was her last baby, and she spent the last months she would ever have as a mother to a newborn disappointed that she wasn't a boy.