Sex Drive - Albany,CA

You say he's "sick." We don't know what that means: cancer, the flu, Lyme disease, heart transplant...
If it seems to you that his sex drive is improving as his health improves, then it's likely it will continue to do so, right?
I don't mean this to sound snarky, but if he's "sick" then his health is the important issue. If you've been married for any length if time, you probably already know about and have experienced some "peaks and valleys" with each if your sex drives. Maybe before you lost weight, you weren't as interested? So how did your husband handle his end then? Is it necessary that he knows when you TCB? If it makes him feel bad, why share that?
Seems like your particular issue isn't "spicing it up" it's just a frequency imbalance.

Replace your shower head with one on a hose. (I forget what they are called but you know what I'm talking about.) =0)

I'm sure this is slightly embarrassing. I have to say that the best thing you can do for you both is get your husband healthy again.

He's been sick for 4-6 months (maybe that's just the sex drive)? Either way, that's a long time. Get into high gear working with specialists to help him. Once he's well, then go on a second honeymoon.

Don't keep telling him how horny you are. That just makes him anxious. Put your energies into healthy food, maybe veggie and fruit shakes, protein, etc. Get a nutritionist if you need to.

Good luck!!

That happened to me when I lost weight too, so I know exactly what you are talking about. What works for us is to only be together when the initiator wants to celebrate the partner, to enjoy making the other one feel good. If all one of wants is to, um, get there, we take care of ourselves (alone or together). That removes any expectation that it is his responsibility to rise to the occasion whenever you are feeling it. Not only that, when we are together, it's always great. We also do a lot what we call "saying hello," which is friendly brief intimate touching that is not intended to lead to anything, just more of an expression of appreciation for how wonderfully those parts work together at the times we both want that. That really helped to take the pressure off, since it established that intimate touching doesn't always have to lead to anything. If it does... bonus! :)

Get his testosterone checked! As well as a general physical . . .

Otherwise I would just be patient with him like he probably was with you.

why does he know when you TCB on your own? surely you can take a nice bubbly bath or a shower, or shut the bedroom door, or break out the vibrator while he's at work, right? unless you're under his watchful eye all the time, and he's jealous of YOU being you, i just can't imagine why it's an issue.
obviously his health needs to be addressed, and it will be nice when you're both in synch again. but surely you can gain a few private minutes a few times a day.
khairete
S.

Don't be afraid to take things into your own hands in his presence. Make it clear that it's okay if he's tired, but that you like him there with you. It will allow you to be less frustrated, and him to feel emotionally connected to what you're doing.

I hope he's well soon.

You can do all the work when he is sick....

Do you own a vibrator? If not, get one if it wouldn't bother him too much. There's nothing wrong with it. I always think of that quote by Woody Allen in Annie Hall- "Hey! Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love." In all seriousness, that will handle your problem without him feeling like he's letting you down. Once he's healthy, you can just put it away.