Separation Anxiety - Zelienople,PA

If he really can't offer a reason for his anxiety, like bullying, then maybe you could just remind him that it's OK to miss you, but he still has to do his job. His job is to go to school, swim class, etc., and have a really good time. You miss him and Daddy every day, too, but you and Daddy still have to do your jobs, too. Then devote the first 15 minutes in the door in the evening to sitting down and giving him your undivided attention. This will let you both relax and unwind for a quick break, and he'll go on with his evening instead of whining and following you around the kitchen while you're trying to get dinner. The fact that this is new behavior says it's probably a phase. Good luck.

Full day 1st grade is exhausting for a lot of kids. There's a lot going on including eating a meal with little supervision. He's probably just overwhelmed by things right now.

He's old enough for you to sit down with him and chat about the situation. Let him know how proud you are of him and when a great job he's doing going from a little boy to a bigger boy. As him if a special treasure might help him feel better about being away from you for the day. Maybe you could get a coin or a marble or something small that he can put in his pocket to remind him that even though you aren't there where he can see you you are still with him always.

Hi S.. My daughter went through major separation anxiety coupled with other types of anxiety from preschool through first grade. We found some of the techniques mentioned by other moms to be helpful: the kissing hand, notes and stickers, a special "mommy daughter" necklace plus counseling. I also put a picture of our family in her folder that she can look at if she misses us, and created her own personal list of emergency phone numbers. I hesitated with this last one for fear that it might generate anxiety, but in my daughter's case it empowered her and eased worries that she may not be able to get back to us if something went wrong. May or may not be the case for your son.

If you choose to remove swimming as an extra-curricular, I would be sure to keep physical activity in his routine - maybe scheduled playground time that includes you? Exercise, nutrition, and time outdoors are really effective ways to curb anxiety. Don't let the mommy guilt-mongers get you down! This is about transitions and change that can feel threatening and overwhelming to little ones. My daughter and I spend TONS of time together and yet her anxiety far outstripped your sons. I really like the suggestion of giving him your undivided attention for the first fifteen minutes that you are back together. It makes the evening go more smoothly for my littles and for me. Good luck! Hard as it may be in the moment, this will get better

What about sending him with a gender neutral necklace or bracelet that you both wear? When he's missing you he can rub the bracelet and know that you are thinking of him too? Also, if he can read, send him with a little note for him to read when he gets on the bus. If he can't read, send him with a sticker he can open up when he gets on the bus. It sounds like you need to cut out all extra- curricular activities like swimming until he's more comfortable separating from you-- if he's at daycare and then school he's gone ALOT. Make sure the rest of the time he's with you and he'll be fine once he gets used to the new routine.

This happened to my son mid-way through kindergarten. Same thing-missed me. Took about 2 weeks and then he was ok. The counselor worked with him alot. Just last week his first grade teacher said that he started to cry and said he missed me. I really don't have any advice on how to deal with this but just wanted to let you know that you are not alone.

Hi, S.:
When, where, what amount of time are you spending with your son?
Just want to know.
Thanks.

D.

I am a SAHM and my daughter did this when she was in 1st grade also. She went to the nurses office 4 times in the first 7 days of school. Telling them her heart hurt because she missed me so much!! So heartbreaking, whether you are a working mom or not!!! Here's what I did...first I talked to her about it. Letting her know it was a big kid thing to go to school all day and as much as she missed me, I missed her but we HAVE to do this!! Everyone goes to 1st grade. Then when she went to the nurses office again I went to the school. I talked to the counselor and she was FABULOUS!! She talked to my daughter about having "schoolitis" and a "nervous belly". She would regularly go and check in on my daughter. So I would talk to the school...use your resources that's what they are there for. She is in 2nd grade now and absolutely loves school. It won't go on forever just remain consistent with everything. He will be fine. :-)

This may be too young for him, but I bought a book for my son called "The Kissing Hand" and it's all about leaving your parent to go to school but it talks about kissing the palm of your child's hand and every time they get sad they can put the kiss up to their cheek and know that Mommy loves them and then the child does it to the Mommy. My son still sometimes will say let's do the "kissing hand" and we do and he loves it because the kiss is with them all day. It may be a bigger issue than that, but it's still a very cute book.