Hi J.!
Congrats to you for going natural even with a pitocin-induced labor at the hospital! I have one baby boy who is almost 11 mos old now, and another baby boy on the way due right before Chistmas! I chose to go have my baby at the Birth and Family Place Birth Center in Holladay, Utah. I was DETERMINED to go natural my first time and felt I would have a much better chance at it to have the baby outside the hospital, where an epidural was not even an option unless I transferred, but also where natural birth is the norm and I wouldn't have to fight to get our birth experience the way we wanted it! My midwife. Rebecca McInnis, didn't even need to read my birthplan, because they way they do everything routinely there is exactly the was we wanted it. My water broke at 10:30 at night right when my hubby and I were going to bed, and by 3 am we went up to the birth center because the contractions were 2-3 minutes apart and painful enough that I didn't want to lay down through them. I thought at that time that I was fully in active labor, at that point I didn't realize how intense it was actually going to get. I was sitting there on the birth ball through contractions, rocking back and forth to help keep myself calm and relaxed and thinking "this isn't so bad, I can definitely DO THIS!" Well, then Becky asked to check me because I was still smiling, laughing, and joking in between contractions, and when she found that I was still dialated just as much as when I had come in two hours before, and since my water had already broken, she told me wenned to GET THIS LABOR MOVING. She had my husband and I go into the big tub and do nipple stimulation in between contractions (its basically just rolling your nipples in between your fingers) She told us to do it til I got a contraction, then once it ended do it again til the next one came...Well, honestly I don't really know why hospitals even USE pictocin, because after just 4-5 minutes of mipple stimulation in the tub, that next contraction that came BLEW MY MIND. It was like jumping from a 2 in intensity to a 10 all in one step. I almost threw up from the sheer force of it! After it ended I was basically quivering in the tub going (in my head) "OH CRAP, WHAT DID I GET MYSELF INTO?!?!" And My midwife came in, knowing that I had had a good contraction since she had heard me the whoe way through it, and says "Okay, so now that you know what a REAL contraction feels like, tell me what you want to do...Do you want to stay here and continue to get this labor moving even better, or would you like to go to the hospital and get an epidural?" Honestly I could NOT answer that question myself, I had to turn to my husband and have HIM say it. I was like "Well, what do YOU think we should do?" and He says "I say we stick to the original plan" And I just turned back to Becky and said weakly "Yeah. What he said..." While meanwhile I was going in my head "HOLY CRAP, HOLY CRAP, HOLY CRAP..."
Well, Thats what we did. We stayed and it honestly did NOT get any more intense after that first HUGE contraction. they stayed about the same in intensity, but it was just those first few that were the hardest to handle (until I got to pushing anyways). I found that vocalizing and moaning my way through each contraction REALLY got me through them and kept me relaxed and breathing slowly. The reason I think that it didn't get more intense is because my body was better equiped to handle it after that first one. I knew what to expect, and I honestly just drifted off into Labor Land. I was falling asleep in between contractions, moaning the whole way thorugh them, and passing right back out again in between. There is a scientific reasoning behind it too, that makes a lot of sense. During a natural labor without any interventions, your body slowly builds up endorphins. the longer your labor, the more endorphins are released. Endorphins are like nature's painkillers - they dull your awareness and your sensations and also dull your memory of the event. Within just a few minutes of my baby being born when I tried to look back and remember how it felt I couldn't, I just knew it was very intense. I wouldn't even call it "painful" because it wasn't the sharp, stabbing pain of an injury or anything like that, just a rolling wave of intensity that washes over you for a minute or so and then leaves you feeling perfectly normal in between until it washes over your again. It was the same pain, over and over, but with breaks in between that really help you get through it and take it one contraction at a time. By no means is it EASY - I can clearly remember sitting in that rocking chair in the middle of a contraction going (in my head) "I can SO understand why women get epidurals!" But, the neat thing is, your body can do it. and if you relax and just let you body take over, it will and althoguh you are just along for the ride, you can do it and your body WILL do it if you don't fight it. But yes, because of those endorphins building up, most of my labor after those first few shockingly intense contractions is a fuzzy haze im my momory... it all just blurs together. I was in active labor from around 5:30 am to 11:30, I didn;t even notice when I went through transistion - I was so out of it by that time that I didn't even notice the contractions were coming almost on top of eachother - and then I was fully dialated and ready to push.
Pushing is another step UP in intensity - I screamed during every push, and I pushed for 2 and a half hours so I totally had no voice for the next few days LOL! The long pushing phase was kinda my own fault. I had read over and over that you shouldn't push as HARD as you can while crowning so that oyu have time to stretch and avoid a tear.... so I was pushing, but not PUSHING-PUSHING for the first 40 minutes or so. Then finally I asked my midwife where the baby was, since all the birth stories I had read said pushing was generally like 15-30 minutes, if that... and my baby's head was STILL no where to be seen, when I was expecting him to basically start crowing RIGHT AWAY. She was like "You're not pushing?! You need to push him around your pubic bone before he is even going to START crowning, and that takes ALOT of effort!" So yeah, after that I pushed with everything I had and each and every contraction I would ask if he was around that bone yet... that took about 20-30 minutes more, and it was really neat that I could FEEL HIM movie down with the pushes. We did take it nice and slowly during crowning and Becky was great helping me not to tear. Finally after what seemed like absolutely forever since I was so exhausted by that time he arrived - Head and body out all in one contraction! I wouldn't have torn at all, but he came out with his fist in his mouth, so I did end up with a few stitches anyways unfortunately!
It was amazing to be able to hold our baby and get to know him RIGHT away after the birth - he was passed to us RIGHT away, and we got to look into his eyes the first time he opened them and hold him and cuddle him for over an hour without having to give him to anyone else. I loved how gentley and smootly everything went after the birth. They made us both a big meal and did Gawyn's weight and measurements and tests all right on the end of the bed. He was born at 12:55pm and weighed 7 lbs, 5 oz and was 20 inches long - average sized, and healthy and bright eyed! He barely even cried!
I was absolutely blown away by the whole experience. At first I felt almost a little bit bitter (that's not relly the right word) at the intensity of it all, since it was SOOOO much more intense than I had expected it to be, but within just a few hours and especially after a few days had gone by, I just because more and more blown away by the fact that my body was able to MAKE this perfect little baby all on its own, and I would look at him, and think "Oh, he's so tiny!" and then I would immediately think "Oh my gosh, he is HUGE!!! How did he ever fit inside of me? and how on earth did I push him out?!" But really, its a miracle, and you literally do feel like you can do anything at all after sucessfully going through the experience, even if its tough!
I was so glad that we stuck with our original plan and did NOT go to the hospital to get that epidural - I knew I had wanted a natural birth more than anything, and I would have felt that I let myself down if I had done it any other way. not to mention ALL the people would would have been saying "I told you so!" Afterwards if I had - Most of them were MEN who were like "You're crazy, blah blah blah..." or "just wait til you feel it..." I now have MANY women who have had babies and had epidurals talk to me like I'm some sort of super woman for doing it natural without any sort of drugs. I definitely don't feel like a super woman. I feel like an average woman who just trusted that her body was able to do what it was made to do on its own and then went along for the wild ride. I think its aweful that american society has seemed to sucessfully convince women that their bodies are not strong enough to give birth on their own. No wonder why post-partum depression is SO common nowadays. I was FLYING HIGH after my natural birth - SO AMAZED by what my body could do and so blown away by our new little baby it created for us!
I'll definitely be going all-natural again with my second baby. I know what I'm signing up for this time, and I also know that I can do it, regardless of hiw long it lasts or how intense it gets. Of course, I hope that the second will come faster (or mostly just with LESS pushing, now that I know what I'm doing) But I am prepared to go through with it exactly the way it was last time too. I know it wont be, but know that however it turns out, I can do it! Yes, labor is definitely the most intense experience I have ever had in my life, but its also the most empowering, most amazing thing my body has EVER done. I am very excited to experience it again!
I hope my story helps a little - I told myself I wouldn't write too much since you asked for 2nd+ birth stories and that was my first one... But of course I got carried away! And who knows, maybe a first-time mom will read this too! My best advice is mostly just about the fact that your body releases endorphins all through your labor ONLY IF you do not have other drugs in your body that interfere with it's natural chemistry. The endorphins are nature's was of blocking out the pain and dimming your memory or the experience... and they really help you get through it. My most painful contractions were those first few big ones, and I think its because they jumped up in intensity because of the nipple stimulation so quickly that my body's endorphins didn't have a chance to catch up for a few more contractions. After that, I was living in the moment but off in my own hazy zone. I was out of it completely and the rest just completely blurred together. It certainly didn't feel like 6 more hours of contractions to me, If i didn't know what time I went in the tub and what time I had the baby to work out the math I never would have known how long I sat there for... and it definitely helped too not to have my midwife checking me every hour or two either because then I wasn't feeling discouraged. She only checked me three times - when we got there at 3am (4 cm), at 5 am (4 cm still) and then at 11 or so and I was a 9.5 and in the middle of transition. Just a few contractions later I was pushing. I'm glad I didn't have all those in-between checks to make me go "UGH, I'm only a _____?!?!" and then start wondering how much longer I would be sitting there for and getting discouraged.
Well, Good luck! I'm excited to hear how your second birth goes! congrats on baby # 2! It's so exciting to grow your family, and I know you can go all natural the second time around - I bet it will feel MUCH more bearable than your first labor!!