My sweet little boy is starting to worry me regarding his behavior. Recently, he has started hitting and kicking me and does not want much to do with me. Whenever he gets hurt or wakes up in the morning, he wants his daddy. He even pushes me away or says no when I try to console him or hug him. A few mornings this past week, he has even pushed me away and ran to his daddy. I have been putting him in timeouts whenever he hits me. The good news is that he does not do this at daycare. A lot of mothers have told me this is just a stage, but it hurts me emotionally. I do not know what to think anymore. Any suggestions or anyone else feeling this way. I have never heard of a kid not wanting his mommy!!!
My 3 year old wants daddy all the time. My other children wanted me. My 18 month old prefers me, but also takes her daddy's comfort. The oldest 2 prefer me. Each child is different. Is daddy gone more out of the house? This may be why he wants daddy's confort more?
It's a phase, I will assume since you are pregnant, maybe it's more defined. In his mind you are having another baby to replace him. Just a thought. Don't let it hurt your feelings- we are big girls, we can take it. My son used to tell me he wanted to go live with his dad- because dad let him drink Mountain Dew- ok whatever- but my son was totally serious at the time. Anyway- very little canbreak the bond of a mother and her son in the long run. You will be ok, and remember- he's also entering that "terrible 2's" stage.
I'm sure it is just a stage. Our 2-1/2 year old daughter is the same way. She has always been a daddy's girl and there have been times when she has wanted absolutely nothing to do with me. Even when she was a tiny baby there were times when I couldn't comfort her at all but as soon as daddy took her she was fine. At this age especially they are starting to develop their own independence and develop their personalities. I know it's hard not to take it personally but it will get better.
Hi B.,
As soon as i read that you were expecting it all fell into place, your little boy is upset about the baby that is coming. My daughter did the same thing to me when i was pregnant with my little boy. HE is jealous and afraid that you will not have time for him once the baby comes, try to reassure him and explain to him how HE will be able to be involved with the new baby --make it exciting for him, keep him involved in all that is going on so he feels a sense of security. He is also probably scared and unsure of the unknown, what is going to happen to you and what will happen to life as he knows it once the baby is here; if you can start talking about it all with him now maybe he will not feel so unsure of this big change. Hang in there i remember how hurt i was when my daughter went through this, i promise it will get better:)
B.,
It sounds to me like a couple of things are going on, none of which are your fault or abnormal. One of the issues is that he is choosing daddy over you because kids do that. They choose different times in which each parent is the preferred parent. It also can be due to the fact that he has you more often than dad so he wants to get his time in so to speak. Another factor could be jealousy of the new baby that you are carrying. Kids are really smart and I am sure you and your husband have been talking about the baby and some of the things that are going to happen when the baby comes and so he is feeling that the world is being turned a bit and mommy is carrying the reason. He will adjust and you again will be his chosen parent before you know it. If he is anything like our son he will choose when it is most difficult (wanting to be held while you are feeding the baby).
Good luck, congratulations. This too shall pass and don't doubt that you are still the one he will want when he isn't feeling well.
My son did the same thing as far as the hitting and kicking goes. He will be 2 1/2 next month and is getting much better about it. He will run to me when he gets hurt and not daddy. He is a daddy's boy but when he's hurt or upset he only wants mama. He will push daddy away if he tries to hug him or anything. Im sure its just a stage and would not worry about. He used to hit me and kick me all the time to. He never has done this with dad or at daycare or anyone else but me. I think it is because i am with him more (my hubby works 2nd shift so we only see him on the wknds) and do most of the disiplining. He is getting better and learning how to control his emotions better. We used just do the timeout also when he would hit me. I think that stage lasted about 4-6 months. Now he will hit a wall or throw a toy or tip a chair over but doesnt hit or kick much and is learning how to better control his feelings. I would not worry just be consistant in letting him know that its not ok to hit or kick. Im sure he will grow out of the only wanting daddy stage to. It is good he is close with him and wants him. It will help you a bit when the baby comes. I am 31 wks prego with a little girl, so it will be interesting to see how everything goes in the begining. Just be patient and it will get better, but dont take it personally, im sure its just a stage.
