Seeking Advice on Sleep Issues with My 3 and 7 Year Old Boys

My 3 year old had recurring nightmares and sometimes fights going to sleep at night because she is fearful. I taught her the Bible verse Psalm 56:3 “What time I am afraid, I will trust in God.” She says the verse and I personalize Psalm 4:8 and pray “Help Grace lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, Lord make her dwell in safety.” God is honoring our prayers. My daughter rarely has nightmares anymore and calls on God by quoting the verse when she is afraid, day or night. I am grateful she is already leaning on the Lord and I pray that you and your little ones will find strength in Him, too.

I can feel your pain on this one for sure!! You seven year old might benefit from a loud fan or other noise maker for constant noise, that would drown out the other noises. He is also old enough to bribe a bit. For one of mine, if she stayed in bed, she got choc. milk with breakfast. She loved that, so maybe find something that would work well for his personality. Now with the 3 year old you could try one of two things (none of which involve locking him in his room, which I personally could never do:) Maybe, lay a blanket and pillow on the floor in your roon, and tell him he can lay there, but not in your bed! He may lose interest after a while. Or, the tougher approach on all of you is just to take him back to bed..no conversation, rocking etc, and lay him back down. Everytime he gets up, just do it again. It will be a tough few nights, but it should work in the end. If he is obviously upset, then I agree that you may need to sit quietly on the floor for a bit, but if you can tough it out for about a week, the problem should resolve by then. Good luck..go take a nap:)~A.~

We had the same problem with our three-year-old. He's obssessed with trains (Thomas, etc), so I made a sticker chart with a picture of Barnes & Noble on it and told him that if he got five stickers in a row, I'd take him to B & N for a treat and some time at their train table. He had to sleep in his own bed all night to get a sticker. When we first started, my husband and I would take turns sitting by his bed until he fell back to sleep, but he had to be in his bed (no holding, walking, rocking). It was hard at first, but, eventually he went back to sleeping on his own. Although he knew about the chart, I don't think we gave the first sticker until the first night he slept on his own and we didn't have to sit with him.

Locking a child in their room would not only be cruel, but dangerous. If a child is really afraid, what can you do? You can't tell him his fears are silly on not real because to him, they are. I would buy an air mattress or make a pallet on my bedroom floor for him when he is afraid. He can just come in and go to sleep without disturbing you. If your 3 year old is upstairs, don't you have a fence at the top of the stairs? If not, I would get one because a child that young could fall especially in the middle of the night. I would use a reward system for staying in their bed all night, too. Once they earn 5 stickers for staying in their bed 5 nights, they get a really special treat.

Does anyone here watch Supernanny...do not make a pallet on the floor for them in your room. You are starting a habit you will never break.
If they wake up simply take them back to their beds. No conversation, no rocking, nothing. Lay them in bed. If they get up again, continue to repeat this. It will take a good couple of days for them to realize you're not going to let them sleep with you or even talk with them. This really truly does work. No 3 yr old and definitely not a 7 yr old should be sleeping anywhere besides their own beds.
The fan, or some type of low music would work great for your 7 yr old.

Try this, and it will work.