I would like to suggest a book to you to incorporate into your marriage counseling. I don't know what your situation is, but the little that you've said sounds like you could possibly be happy in your marriage again if you are both willing. When my husband and I got married we were given a book that I have found to be a great asset to keeping our relationship healthy. Granted it only really works the best if both people participate. Same goes for the counseling as well, if only one is trying then it is doomed to fail. The book is His Needs Her Needs by Willard F. Harley Jr. he is a successful marriage counselor right here in the twin cities. He also has a monthly news letter that you can subscribe to via e-mail. I don't remember the address right off hand but you can google it.
I have always looked at marriage like a job, because it takes work to make it successful and it isn't always easy and it's even harder when children are involved. My parents divorced when I was rather young and being on that side of the fence I can tell you that either way you need to be able to communicate to each other for the best interest of the children no matter how your relationship turns out.
You can make the money work if you have to, it is simply setting your priorities and be realistic about what you can afford and what you cant. That is good for any person no matter their situation.
The other thing is to not talk negative about your spouse in front of the children. negativity spawns negativity, don't go looking for it or creating it, it will just add to your unhappiness. If your willing to look for the positive in your surroundings you will find it.
children adjust better the younger they are, but it is still important that they know they are loved. Not just now of course but as they grow up, each of you need to express your love for them, whether that is together or separate.