Secondary Infertility- Help!!!!

Updated on December 30, 2008
S.P. asks from Temecula, CA
17 answers

I have been trying to get pregnant for 15 months now and can't seem to conceive. I have a 4 year old son and had absolutely no trouble at all getting pregnant with him. We haven't tried any infertility procedures, but we have tried acupuncture, Chinese herbs, and supplements. I check my Basal body temperature every morning, and have already seen my OB/Gyn twice in the last 6 months. He wants to try clomid or something more severe soon. Can someone out there give me some suggestions? Did anything work for you that was out of the norm?

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

I would see your OB/GYN.
My Doctor told me, that if after 6 months of not conceiving, then to consult him. When I got pregnant the first & second times (naturally), I was over 35 years old. So age is or is not a factor. And, my OB/GYN always tells his patients to continue taking pre-natal vitamins prior to wanting to conceive.

It could be anything. The "problem" could even be with your Husband. It is not always the wife.
Even just "stress" alone, can prevent a woman from getting pregnant.

The thing is, just taking herbals or whatever is rumored to help... can also "not" help. And what is good for one person, may not be for the other. So, it's just not GUARANTEED.

You also want to be sure that your periods are regular, and your ovulation symptoms. You can also track your Basal body temperature every morning, and keep track of periods and ovulation symptoms.

The best thing, is to consult your Doctor. Get an exam, make sure there are no other problems. You have waited 5 years already, with no results... so I would now check with Doctor.

All the best,
Susan

1 mom found this helpful
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C.A.

answers from San Diego on

The same thing happened with my 3rd child. With my first two, I got pregnant rather easily. We wanted to start trying for another one when my daughter turned 2. We tried for 18 months with no luck. I finally got to the point where I was just so tired from trying, I didnt want to try anymore. We sat down and just decided maybe we should look at other options in a couple of months and to not worry about it. 6 weeks later, I found out I was pregnant again. Your body will know when the time is right for you. For me, it was just loosing a few extra pounds and not trying so hard to conceive, as if my life depended on it. Good luck to you!

1 mom found this helpful
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B.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

I had secondary infertility as well. Over 18 months I had 7 chemical pregnancies (pregnant but it fails in 5th-6th week). It was very disheartening. My first pregnancy was a cinch (pregnant 2 months after trying and it stuck without issue). For the second pregnancy I went to an OB who specialized in fertility stuff, and I went through the whole gamut of tests. They found nothing wrong. I tried Clomid and it did wacky things to my cycle. I did acupuncture, energy work, health food... I finally gave up after 18 months, and the next month I got pregnant and it stuck. I know it sounds corny, but maybe trying too hard does cause stress.

I know you want to do something though. Have you had your thyroid levels checked? Often they are out of wack after a pregnancy, but go undetected. I would go to a reproductive endocrinologist and have a full panel done. Also have your husband checked. I actually made my husband do that first before I went through the gamut of tests, but he was fine.

I know how hard of a struggle it is. And the medical community makes you feel greedy because after all, you already have one child, right? That makes me mad because I know how much I longed to have two. Do not give up hope. No matter how many times it didn't work for me, I KNEW in my heart I was meant to have at least one more child. Hold that thought through it all.

Take care,
B.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Good luck with conceiving. Just wondering .... any stress? It took us more than 8 months to get pregnant with our second .... my brother-in-law was dying of cancer and although I was not totally aware of it, I was feeling the stress of it. I conceived maybe a week, or two at the most after his funeral. Until then, I had no idea that I had been so stressed about the situation - I just thought it was the hand we had been dealt and I was coping the best I could for our entire family. In hindsight, I realize that is probably why it took us so long to conceive.

Look at aspects of your life and make sure you aren't dealing with too much stress - as that does play a major role.

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J.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

I'd suggest seeing a reproductive endocrinologist (RE) rather than your OB/GYN. Most OB's don't have the expertise that an RE does, and they use clomid like it's candy. They may not monitor you as closely as an RE, and it's very possible to end up with HOM's - high order multiples (think the McCaughey septuplets or 'John and Kate plus 8'). Besides, clomid might not even be what you need. Many RE's, including the last one I went to, will give you a free consultation. Good luck to you.

J.....6.5 months pg with twins from IVF cycle #9 and mom of a 4yo daughter from cycle #7. This will definitely complete our family!

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K.G.

answers from Las Vegas on

Hi S.,

I had the same thing. No problem getting pregnant with my daughter, but when we tried again for years, nothing happened. My problem was that I had very high prolactin levels. The levels indicated to my body that I was pregnant even though I wasn't. I was still producing milk even though I never breastfed my daughter. Once I got the prolactin levels under control thanks to my GYN and medication, I became pregnant very quickly with my son. My kids are ten years apart. Its a long shot, but just one more thing that you could check on. Good luck!

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G.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hey S.~

Hang in there, you are not alone. Many women struggle with infertility. It took me 4 years to get pregnant with my first and then when he was 6 months old I got pregnant again...go figure! Come to find out my hormone levels were too low to conceive but we didn't find that out until we went to a specialist (Huntington Reproductive Center in Pasadadea is wonderful).
I took Clomid for a few months prescribed by my regular OBGYN and when that wasn't working we went to the reproductive center where I had to give myself shots for 9 days in a row and I went in every couple days where they did vaginal ultrasounds to closely monitor the size of my follicles...anyway, if you are able to see a specialist (at least for a consultation) please do since they are experts in the area and can spot problems quicker and easier than a regular OBGYN. It's frustrating to hear people tell you to relax etc. because that seems impossible when it's what you're soo focussed on, but for me, charting my temp etc. everyday made me concentrate and stress about it more. After a year I stopped doing all that stuff because it was consuming me! Go to a specialist and let them take some of the stress off your shoulders. They will start with the least evasive and move on from there according to what you are comfortable with.
If you believe in God, then know that He has a perfect plan for you and your family. He knows your innermost thoughts and wants what's best for you. That helped me to relax about it as well.
It will be great to look back on this someday, until then keep a positive attitude and enjoy each day with your son!

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K.Y.

answers from Los Angeles on

I agree with the other poster on all counts...see your OB/GYN, stop the herbal supplements, and relax. Stress can be a huge factor too, including weight and general health. Best wishes for success!

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C.D.

answers from Honolulu on

Try putting your legs up in the air after sex. It worked for me when I tried having my first baby.
Good luck!
C.

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K.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

I used clomid the second time around and it worked for me. I charted and could pinpoint my problem down to late ovulation. Is that your problem? Do you know that you are ovulating each month? Just wondering if that is why your OB wants to try clomid.

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M.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think it's time to stop trying for a while, and just concentrate on enjoying your special time with your hubby. Your baby will come.

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J.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

I actually believe in an eastern/ western approach.
I used acupuncture and clomid. After two rounds, I got
pregnant with a healthy son. It sounds like you are not ovulating, and that is what clomid is for. Clomid must be taken at certain times of the month (your doctor will explain), so I received acupuncture during those times.
Please e-mail me, if you have any specific questions.

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C.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Have they checked your pituitary gland?

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W.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Have you had your Thyroid checked, it plays a huge roll in fertility and I know that a lot of women trying to get pregnant can't because of the Thyroid. If you can find a holisitic MD that will prescribe Armor, it is a great way to go. Check out the Basal Body temp. chart for possible thyroid problems and see if it can be playing a roll.

Also, you can try Royal Maca, found at health food stores or purchased through a health care Physician, my husband carries it in his office, he is a Chiropractor and has had great success with his patients using it.

God bless you~

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S.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

My sister had the same problem, she found a great book that helps explain when you should really be trying and how to figure out for yourself if there is an actual problem.
"Taking charge of your fertility" Toni Weschler, MPH

She figured out that she ovulates late, so that was the problem. My niece is a happy two year old and she is 8 1/2 months pregnant again.
Good Luck.

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V.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hello S.. I wanted to let you know that a number of moms in my group (March 2009 babies) said that they used Metformin (prescribed by their doctor's) to get pregnant, or assist with conception. I don't know how it works, but like I said, a number of them used it. I was taking Metformin for about a year, a couple of years ago, because my doctor prescribed it to me for Metabolic Syndrome. I don't know if one had anything to do with the other (I don't think it did since I haven't taken it in quite a while) but I was told I would never be able to have kids again, and I am pregnant - my youngest is almost 13! On the flip side, after my first, I was told the same thing, that I would never conceive or carry to term, another child, and I had a second one after that, so I really don't know why I have been able to. Best of luck to you, and ask your doctor about Metformin. It doesn't hurt to gather information :)

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V.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Classical Homeopathy for you and your husband.
Good Luck
V

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