Screaming 3 Yo Son

There is a great book, "How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and How To Listen So Kids Will Talk"

They have fabulous ideas that are very effective.

Someone mentioned to me, about words (such as NO) that you don't want them to use... have them write it on a paper (or with your help) and put it in a ziploc of water, and freeze it. Then, it's 'frozen and can't be used' ...it's a very hands-on, interactive tool that helps them understand the process of 'putting a word away not to use'

Another idea is to have him help you make a list of words he CAN use instead of NO. When he says NO, you simply state what he doesn't want, by putting it in positive words for him (this also validates his feelings) Validating feelings is important to them because it lets them know you UNDERSTAND them and LISTEN to them, but doesn't have to concede to misbehavior, you can validate yet still stand firm.

message me any time, I'd love to know how things are going.

Is your son really getting enough quality sleep? I ask this question because of your unusual sleep schedule. As someone who used to work at night sometimes, I know what effect trying to sleep during the day can have on your mind and body. The internal human clock is designed for you to be up during the daylight hours and asleep when it's dark. Of course, many people who have to work nights learn to cope, but a chid's body is not as mature. A child who is sleep-deprived is more prone to have behavior problems. I don't know if this is the case with your son, but it's something you might want to consider.

Well first let me say that I have shared your situation. My son is 4 and has sleep apnea. He is getting his tonsils removed this summer. So the first thing is you must have a consequence for his actions. And at that age the best thing is time out. My son used to do the same thing and just screamed and wouldn't sit still when he was in time out. But over time they get used to it. It took my son 6 weeks to stop getting up out of time out. This is the way to do it. When he does something he knows he is not suppose to do, do not give warnings for things he knows are not okay and give only one warning for other things, take him by the shoulder to the time out spot. Physically sit him down so that he can feel your hands directing him. Then kneel down to his level and without using your figure pointing at him, explain in a stern voice what he did, that it's not exceptable and how long he must sit there. Now this is a big key. Use a timer that beeps when it goes off so that your not the one making up the time. Let him know after three minutes when the timer beeps he can get up to talk to you. After he gets up explain again at his level what he did that was not okay, try to not use the word no with him, and he must apologize. And immediately give him a hug and tell him he's great and that you love him. Then move on. Now this wont work at first. If he screams let him, if he gets up continue to sit him back down over and over. With my son the first two days I think he was in time out all day. But that's what it takes. The other thing is to try to spend more quality time sitting and playing. This will give more time for other things because he will feel content with his one on one time. And last I want to agree with something another mother said. It doesn't matter if your husband works at night. He has to sleep normal hours and have a normal nap time. Our bodies are not designed to sleep when the sun is up. That would be a problem for a child without sleep apnea. And if you don't think it's a problem to have him sleeping weird hours read up on it. I have been doing a lot of reading about children and sleep. And it is very clear that it is not good for them to go to bed anytime after 9pm. I hope this helps some. It's going to be very hard at first. But you have to step up to the plate for your son.

I don't really have any advise on how to get your son to stop screaming but I would suggest that you talk with the neighbors that you share a wall with. Explain the situation to them and apoligize for any occasions in which he has woken then up. I think if the neighbors know that you are working on the problem and value their sleep time they will be more understanding to any disruptions that you can't control.

Best Wishes!