Santa Claus & the Tooth Fairy

If you teach her that honesty is the best policy and want her to always be honest with you, then admit to her you made a mistake about letting her believe something that wasn't real in the first place. Start anew and from now on alway be up front with the truth and she will most likely be the same with you. After all the old saying "do as I say, not as I do", doesn't work with kids. Hope this helps.
Sincerely, S.

Our motto is as long as you believe they still come. I would tell her that and let her know it is ok not to believe but they don't visit you if you don't. (not that my kids wouldn't get presents, but since I have younger children my 12 year old is just fine with that statement!)

Are you tired of playing Santa? If she knows, will Santa still leave her stuff or will that part of it be over? I guess that is where you decide how you tell her. If you really want to keep the tradition of waking up to Santa's presents going, then tell her it is her decision to not believe, but you would like to see the magic still be there. If you are ready for a change in how your family does Christmas, explain to her that parent's carry on the tradition of Santa for magic and surprise of it. Why would she be mad? Most likely she thinks she knows the answer to the question, but in the back of her mind is hoping it is all still real. As much as our kids want to be grown, there is still a part of them that realizes they are growing up. Baby dolls they don't play with, but don't want to give away...you know things like that..

Just my thoughts.. good luck with your decision!

My younger brother "believed" in Santa until he was 11. We later learned that he let us believe that he believed because he was afraid the fun of Christmas presents would stop. I think at 11 when he asked if Santa was real, my mom simply said, "well, what do you think?" and he said, "I don't think so". I think that opened the door to find out what he had heard, what thoughts he had going on...etc. Just turn the question back around and see what you learn.

My husband and I make sure that our kids understand that Christmas is a time of giving, of family and the celebration of the birth of Jesus - we try not to make it too much about presents and limit the number of things they get, especially toys! I love the idea of teaching the story of Santa (Santa Claus is coming to town is a great movie that does talk about the history - though I haven't researched to know how accurate) and will make sure we talk about that some going forward. Thanks for the tip.

My daughter is very concerned about the tooth fairy taking her teeth, so we told her that she takes them and examines them and mails them back home. My husband showed her the teeth, each bagged and dated. This made her happy. She doesn't part with things well. :D

Good luck in whatever you do. Kids are forgiving - she may be mad but it'll be short lived.
M.

Just be truthful with her. I have a six year old son and he knows that there is no such thing as Santa Claus and the tooth fairy. He knows that it's just mommy and daddy. The truth of the matter is he asked us were these things real and I felt we should just tell him the truth instead of of misleading him. Many people think they will "spoil the fun" if they tell the kids the truth , but there are many ways we can have fun with it without being untruthful. I hope this helps

I have two kids, a 10 year old boy and a 5 year old girl...Here's what happened: My 10 year old started getting teased at school that there was no Santa Clause...at first we told him that there was a Santa and we were his helpers, cuz he kept asking when he could see him....then we explained to his that there really was no Santa but that there was a man...St Nick...and we told him his story...giving presents at Christmas was just a way of showing how much we love him and of course for him not to tell his little sister until she got older...so he is pretty good and taking care of her, making sure nobody ruins her Christmas about Santa...I hope this helps...its really a miracle and you stay in AAUUHH when you realize that they do understand where you are coming from at that age....M.

I have a 9 yr. Old girl and she is the same way !
I just keep letting her believe !!!
Plus i have a 6 yr.old son too & do not want to spoil the fun
& excitement for him !
10 is still way too early to tell her !
Just keep it going as long as you can !
Being young is fun !
I would try to hold out till at least she is 13 or 14 !
Good luck ! ~

It is up to you to decide when to tell her. But when you do make it something that she is grown up enough to understand. Also do your research on the history of Santa before you do so you will know what to tell her as well. Many people don't know the history. I told my daughter when she was 7 because she was upset that some kids said that Santa got shot by some hunters but I told her that Santa lived long ago. Basically I told her the history of Santa and that we honor his memory and the lives of the children he touched by participating in a tradition of giving gifts to others with a spirit of love we can share unselfishly. From the point of her knowing the truth I told her she could still believe in the spirit of Christmas as long as she wanted. I also changed the way her gifts were under the tree. That year most of the gifts were from family instead of Santa except one or two gifts and her stocking stuffers. I usually made the thing I wanted to surprise her with from Santa with a smiley face on the tag. It was a clue we set up so her younger friends and siblings that didn't know the truth would not find out until they were old enough to question. We also did a secret Santa for another family every year (I had been doing this anyway but it gave her a special feeling to be able to participate and surprise a family that was less fortunate than us). The deal we made to be brought in on a "traditional secret" was that she had to promise not to share the information and still write her "letter to Santa" every year so the younger ones would not find out. See our family spends Thanksgiving morning with the kids working on Santa letters while the mom's cook lunch and they are read out loud during dessert time. This serves to let other families know what our kids have in mind without asking directly. We can also "mail them" from Grandma's house in the same envelope and Grandma then secretly makes copies to distribute to family after Thanksgiving. We then communicate with the correct parent on what they want us to get for my nieces and nephews. That way there is no duplication and we don't step on mom and dads toes by getting something they want or have already gotten.

Same thing for the Easter Bunny but I do the eggs while kids are sleeping and hide them in the house (weather unpredictable) and they know the things in their baskets are from mom and dad. I usually put trinkets, a little candy, maybe a movie or movie passes.

As for the tooth fairy, I basically told her that it was so that parents could keep and treasure the baby teeth. I have each one in a bag with the date it was lost.

My son is still "believing" so he hasn't been let in on the secrets yet.

Don't worry, this is just another stage of development that your children will go through. They will eventually find out the truth but it is in the presentation that you will either "let her in on the real fun behind christmas" or make her feel angry and betrayed. Most kids are accepting if you present it in a good way and tell them its part of the magic of growing up and our way as parents to make it last a little longer before they have to become "grown up".
C.

I know this may sound silly, but I stil believe in "Santa". I have known since I was about 13 that there wasn't a "real" actual Santa that comes down the chimney and stuff. I believe that you can believe in something and that the spirit of believing is what makes it more fun. Just like when we were kids and used to make believe all sorts of things!! If you teach her that it is more about the spirit of the holiday and not about what others try and make you believe then she may be able to enjoy holidays for a much longer time!

Belief is something all humans have to learn, and it's starts with things like santa and the tooth fairy and the easter bunny and stuff. It gives us spirit....and is something wholesome!

Maybe look into the story of the actual St. Nicholas. It's a very interesting story and it's the root of where "Santa" came from! I was told this story as a child and it made it easier once I realized "Santa" was my parents!

Hello,

i have already raised 3 kids (now in college) and i found that when they start asking is when thier friends are talking about it.
I suggest to keep and close ear to her and try to see what she is hearing from them. It is better to hear it from you or dad than her friends.
Usually around the ages of 11 or 12 is when they figure it out. Depends on their friends and what they know and if you have older siblings. My 2 daughters did not tell thier younger brother because they liked being part of the fun.
We did not tell them right out, they would ask and then say, its really not real is it mom? That is when i said well, what do you think? And then it is really on their own that they reason things out for themselves.- you will know when it is time to say whether or not. It is just instinct- i think.

I wish you lots of luck! We even have a 6 yr old and she is enjoying the fun and so are we.

S.

I am a truthteller, and I don't like to lie to anyone, especially a kid. I would rather take the chance of "spoiling" something for a short time, than be told for years that I lied and asked what else I have like about. What do you say?

Honestly, most kids can me rather philosophical about things. She probably already knows. I mean, she's 10, she goes to school, and since she's asking questions, she's probably smarter than you've given her credit for.

If you up and tell her, will she be angry? Maybe. But how would you feel if someone lied to you for years and then when you started to get suspicious finally told you the truth? Granted, most people separate regular lies from make-believe, but kids don't always understand the difference. However, at 10 she should be able to.

Here's what I would recommend. Sit her down and tell her--and when you do, explain why you did it (because of how much fun it is, etc). If she gets angry, apologize as sincerely as you can. She'll get over it.

Personally, my mom told me that Santa was just a man that dressed up, that it was all make-believe, from the time I was old enough to understand the concept of pretend, and I never had any heartbreak about it. As much fun as it is to believe in Santa, that is what I will do with my daughter. It's just easier--and then the kids don't feel like you've betrayed them.