Roomate/husband

How long have you been together? It sounds like quite a long time. It seems like you have fallen into the "same old routine" both individually and as a couple.

I know how you feel about sometimes just not wanting him to be arround. I love my husband, I'm still in love with my husband, but truth be told, sometimes I just want time to myself or I find having him arround is annoying. I only feel this way occassionally and have never thought of having another relationship or leaving him.

You've stated you enjoy his company, you go out and have a great time. Then do these things. They make you happy. The problem seems to be when you spend long periods of time together, so make them shorter.

There's no reason why you can't and shouldn't be happy now. You just need to find what that is and I'm sure it includes your husband.

A few years ago, this could have been something I have wrote. My Dh and I originally got married in 1995 and around 10 years of marriage....it seemed like the love dwindled away and we both felt lost in our relationship. I think what happened is we started to question who we where and what we wanted out of life....and our communication got terribly stuck in a rut. We couldn't figure out how to come together in our lives anymore without compromising who we believed ourselves to be.

We ended up separating and divorcing...for a few months. We didn't know we'd end up remarrying each other. A few weeks after the divorce was finalized we ended up back together and almost a year later we remarried.

What happened is we realized that we really do still love each other and we reassessed what our goals where in life. What was really important. We had to relearn on our communication. Lol, yesterday Dh and I where standing in the kitchen chatting. He says to me, "I love how I can just listen to what your saying and give some time (in answering some questions that I've been asking about things I think I'd like to do) and usually you end up changing your mind in the end." LOL....kinda neat really.

wishing you and your Dh a lovely Valentine's Day!

Sounds like the years of not seeing each other on a regular basis is catching up with you. It's so sweet he wants to spend time with you and makes time to take a day off and wants you to take a day off, too. Really, so many men wouldn't think of that. Your marriage is certainly worth it - not just for the house and kids, but for you two. Have a photo of you as a family at work and another in your wallet that you see when you open it. Plan time together as a family - not doing things that cost lots of money - just going to the park or a walk or throwing snowballs. It's the little things that add up - both the lack of a few hours together a day and the good things that you do to make traditions and interconnectedness.

It is worth it! You can do it.

You sound pretty young, although you've been with your husband since 18 years of age. How long have you been feeling this way? A friend of mine married at 16. After so many years of being with each other she asked her hubby to leave because she had lost that loving feeling. She dated another man for about a year, then realized that she missed her good friend/husband/lover. They got back together.
I'm not suggesting you go out and do the same thing, but think about what you might be leaving behind if you do decide to leave him. He may not take you back if you feel you made a mistake leaving him. Be 100% sure about your decision, because it could hurt the both of you in the end.

You got some good answers here. I just wanted to chime in and say that I think you're completely normal. It's just that life, marriage, are not like the movies. You live with that person day in and day out, warts and all! Many of my friends have admitted to feeling these same feelings you describe--I think any woman who has been married awhile and tells you she has never felt that way is lying. I don't know what religion you are, but there's a great resource for marriage and family, go to familylife.com. I subscribe to a daily marriage e-mail they send out--makes me realize I'm normal too, but that if I work at it, things get better. Good luck and happy valentine's day!