Pottytraining - San Jose, CA

Unless he's showing interest, I would wait until he does or is about 2 1/2 as it would be too hard right now with a new baby to potty train him.

While you get past the first few months with a newborn, DO start conversations with him about being a BIG brother and a BIG boy. Tell him that BIG boys use the potty and use daddy or someone else he idolizes as an example. Read him lots of potty books (Once Upon a Potty was my boys' favorite and it clearly explains why baby's wear diapers and big kids don't). Send him into the bathroom with dad or if you are okay with it, allow him to watch you use the potty. Talk to him about how nice it is to not have a yucky diaper, how the potty is cleaner and how fun it is to flush it away. After you change a poopy diaper, take him into the bathroom, dump it into the potty and let him flush and say goodbye to it. Get him interested and prepared and let him know that if he tells you when he thinks he has to go, you will help him use the potty.
Good luck getting him prepared for the potty training...he will be easier to train if he is a little older and is really ready to do it!

I do not know moms if you guys right.. my son is 3 right now and he was out of a diper sins 24 monts old. and he loved it going to a bethroom in a right plays like a big boy.. i think you just need to fined a right way to traing him. geve him a big hug when hes don tell him how cool and good it it you know. make him feel like he did something good and right.

Hi there! I have three boys and through experience, none of them were ready to train until after they were three. I know that seems late, but it really truly made it much easier. They are also 18 months apart, so another baby was "around the corner", so I opted to just wait and let them get settled with the new little one and then try. I found that role playing and star charts worked well when they were ready. So, my advise is to just wait until after baby is here and he's a little older...it truly will be easier! I hope this helps!

J.

hi E.,
I will give you some advice based on over 20 years of working professionally with preschoolers. Your son needs to be physically ready in order to be capable of being potty trained. Does he have a dry diaper for several hours on a regular basis? Does he indicate awareness that he is wet or that he is about to urinate? Is he verbal enough to be able to communicate to you in some way that he needs to urinate (or poop)?
Even if he does not show any of these signs, you can begin by offering him the opportunity to sit on the toilet each time you change his diaper. This is just exposure. Do not force him to sit there any longer than he wants to. You are just giving him the chance to sit on the toilet like a big boy. He will probably not urinate because he has already urinated in his diaper. That's okay. Keep it fun. Get a small potty seat to put on the big toilet if he feels it is too big. A stool for his feet is good, too. Some children are afraid of the adult toilet & need a child's toilet. Others do just fine with the adult toilet.
The one thing you never want to do in potty training is to get in a power struggle with your child. Potty training is the one area where the child has total control. You can't force the child to go & the child knows that. Once you get into a power struggle the whole process will take much longer.
Boys tend to take longer than girls to train, though not always. More mature boys who have a calm personality & a good ability to focus catch on more quickly. Active boys who have difficulty focusing will be less aware of their body's signals & will take longer to train. 28 months is still fairly young for a boy.
If you are thinking that you will get your son potty trained before the second child is born, that will most likely not work. Even if he catches on quickly, he will only have been potty trained for one month when the new baby arrives, and it is very common that potty training slips when a new baby is born. A little jealousy & feeling like he wants some attention will be all that is needed for him to begin having accidents. Never get angry when he has acidents. Just calmly change him & remind him to let you know next time he needs to go.
Change his diaper every 2 hours and offer himt the opportunity to use the toilet each time. This will make it more likely that one of these times he will need to urinate at the time he is sitting on the toilet and will have some success. Praise him profusely when he is successful. If your son is able to stay dry for a few hours and is interested in and cooperative about using the toilet, you can try using training pants when you are home. Do not use pull-ups. They feel the same as diapers to childrn ans they pee in them more often than they do in training pants. You want to get the thinck absorbent cotton training pants. Get them a little bit too big so they will be easy for your child to pull down when he has to use the toilet. Dress your child in clothing that is easy to pull down. Overalls are not good for a child thar is potty training because they are too difficult for the child to remove. Jeans can also be difficult to pull down. Loose pants with an elastic waist are best. When you are home for the day & it is warm enough, you can try having him wear just the training pants without pants over them.
If you try all of these things and your son shows no interest at all in using the toilet, it may be better to wait a few months and try again, escpecially since the new baby will be arriving soon. It will be more frustrating to deal with a new baby and a 2 year old who is having accidents, than it wlll be to just change diapers on two chldren. If this should hapen, you can continue to offer your son the opportunity to use the toilet each time you change his diaper, but continue to put a diaper on again after he has sat on the toilet. Good luck!

www.3daypottytraining.com

This was recomended to me on mamasource about 4 months ago. It works.......I swear!

Personally, I would wait til after the baby arrives and everything gets into a routine/settled. I have seen friends try to potty train before the baby arrives, and usually the older child regresses to wanting diapers.

the fact that you are referring to your 2 1/2 year old's age in months sends up a red flag for me. Are you sure you want him to "grow-up" and be potty trained?

Advice to date is spot on. You didn't mention if your son is showing any signs of being ready for potty training. Both my boys trained after 3- neither showed signs of readiness until then. 28 months is still young, especially for boys. Wait until after the baby comes and things settle down. You don't want to turn this into a control issue/battle of wills right off the bat.

They all go on the potty eventually. :)

Congrats on upcoming baby.

Hi E.,

It is not unusual for a little boy to not be interested at your son's age. I believe the average is 35 months for a boy. I have three children and the 3 year mark seems to be magical for the potty training thing. I would start him off, when he shows interest, by sitting on the potty at the same time each day or a few times each day. Once it starts to click, he will become more interested naturally. Take it slow and I'd wait until you are settled with your new baby. Once they start training, it does take a bit of work on your part, so no rush!

Best wishes, L.

Estilla, I totally agree with Larissa. Besides, 28 months is still quite young. I trained mine later, he was 42 months, so there's not any harm until waiting until he at least turns 3 years old, especially for boys who are known to be slower than girls in this matter. And yes, he sure will regress when the new one comes along, so he won't need the extra pressure of potty training. when you do train him, find a way to reward him for going to the potty, this and a bit more maturity will go a long way.

I wouldn't worry about potty training your 28 month old until a few months after your baby is born. 1) You don't need the stress right now. 2) Even if you manage to potty train your son, he may regress after the baby is born. My daughter did that. We had to start from the beginning!

Good luck!

I wouldn't worry, I think most boys are potty trained sometime before 3, or even around 3, my son is also 28 mths old and I'm going to start with him around the Christmas holiday when he will be home with grandma. I also have a 10 mth old. My only suggestion, would be to start the potty training now, or wait until the new baby is maybe 2 or 3 mths old. he may regress when the baby gets here because it will be new and different, plus teh new baby will be wearing diapers, etc.

good luck!! I KNOW I'm gonna need it.

-K.

Hi E. i too have a 31 month old son & wants NOTHING! to do w/the potty scene, he tells me when he has gone 'poop' when he has just pee'd but doesn't tell me when he has pooped, matter of fact when he does poo & i ask him he generaly will say NO he hasn't. i put him on his potty chair before we get in the bath & EVERY single time he waits intill he gets in the bath to pee (which is always immediatly) i have raised 2 other boys (now 25, & 22 ) as i recall! (it has been a few yrs lol) they too were apporaching 3 but were pee trained by there 3rd bday poop trained took a bit longer. so all i can say is "this to we shall pass" i do think you might be wasteing your energy w/a new 1 coming he just might want to ware diapers to get your attention, i don't know him but this is what my 1st 1 did when his brother arrived, they were just shy of 3 yrs apart. mine loved his baby but he already required alot of my attention & i was blessed w/a wonderful content 2nd son, i think he knew his brother was much more needier then he was. thank god! best of luck & patience T. proud momma of 3 boys.

I potty-trained my FIRST son at 20 months and was so happy...but when his baby brother came (at 25 months) he regressed, so I think I would wait too if I were you. Incidentally, I now have a 30 month old who is not potty-trained mostly because of lack of interest on his part and because I haven't had the time to work with him. I've decided to wait until I am home for the upcoming two-week holiday break.

Good luck to you!

Seems to me that 28 months old is really young to be worried about him not being potty trained yet. It's a rare child (though not unheard of) who is trained that young. I'm guessing that the more pressure you put on him now, the harder it will be after the baby is born. Relax and wait a while. He will definitely potty train, they all do it eventually.
L.

If you want to run around chasing him or babysitting a tot on the toilet, go ahead and train him now. Otherwise, just wait. Most boys aren't ready to train till after 3 anyway.

My son was "late" (after 3 1/2) but he was not one of those potty trained for pee, but still pooping in his pants like many other earlier potty trained boys. I dont know about you but I much prefer to deal with poop in a diaper rather than in underpants.

I started him off by getting him to the potty every morning when he woke up, and before getting into the bathtub. If he can do that (if he wakes up dry- that is a big indicator of when they're ready) then you can transition to watching him in regular cloth underpants (pull ups didnt work for us) and learning to watch for the "wiggles" and sending him to the potty.

It will not be too fun to have two in diapers, but it will not be fun chasing one around to get him on the potty and cleaning up after his accidents when you have a baby either.

I am a great grandmother who is also a nanny and early childhood educator. The easiest and pleasantest potty training I have experienced was with a family who put a basket of her child's favorite books next to the potty chair in the bathroom and also a low stool so she or daddy or nanny could sit and read with the child while she sat and relaxed and enjoyed the one on one experience. This lasted several months. It was not fast, but being a special time alone with mommy might make up for the fact that there will be a newcomer vying for attention of mommy. with boys, going to the bathroom with daddy sometimes help wanting to be like daddy and use the big toilet if there is a safe and convenient step stool and aiming and making bubbles is a fun game...good luck. Eventually all will be out of diapers.

try a reward system to encourage your son, one m&m chocolate candy for successfully going pee and 2 m&m's for going poo poo in the potty. You can even give one in the beginning for just trying. Keep encouraging him and watch for his signs that he needs to go and ask at least 2-3x's/ hr
good luck

I TOTALLY disagree with most of these moms! I say do it and stick to it. You have a solid 3-4 weeks to get him used to it. If he does regress after the baby is born, don't freak out- just deal with it. My son was 22 months old when we started with him because we were a month away from baby sister being born. I did not want to buy two sets of diapers nor change two butts, so I trained my son without him showing any signs first. He is old enough for you to talk to him about it now and put the emphasis on being the Big Brother. Most children thrive on accomplishment. My son was so proud of himself and we gave him so much praise, that it went well. I did not want him to get used to going every 20 min, so I didn't train him by taking him every 20 min. Take him to the toilet when he wakes up and then before and after eating and before taking a nap. This system worked for us fail proof in less than one week. He was really good at it for about a week before my daughter was born. He had an occasional accident for the first month, but that is to be expected anyway. Since 24 months, he has been sleeping through the night without diaper/pull-up and will wake up to use the bathroom if needed.
I think it makes your life with two little easier, not more difficult. Sometimes we forget how smart and capable our kids are and underestimate their capability. I also think that some people are afraid to see their babies grow up too fast. Your son with love the independence and so will you.
GOOD LUCK!

My kids are 29 months apart, and my son had just started to be really interested in the potty about a month before his sister came along. After her birth he completely regressed back to diapers even though he was almost completely potty trained. The doctor actually said to completely back off the whole thing for 6 months and then start over when he has adjusted to life with a new sibling. I did what she said. We still made the potty available, but never even suggested he use it. He would once in awhile just go on his own, but nothing consistant. Right before his third birthday he asked to wear underwear. He seriously has been potty trained day and night since. We have had very few accidents too (mostly at other people's houses when playing outside and not sure how long to give himself to get to the potty). It was the easiest most stress free way to potty train. My daughter is now 30 months, and we are taking the same approach with her, making it available but not pushing. The last thing I want is a major power struggle surrounding the issue. My friend went through this and her daughter began to withhold her poop for so long that she was actually vomiting. Not fun and it took her almost a full year longer to train than it did us. Right now I know my daughter is capable, when she is naked all day long she will use the potty without any accidents, but she isn't interested in doing it every day so I am just waiting for her to be ready. I know eventually she will do it on her own. Good luck with whatever you decide.

I really wouldn't hurry if I were you, especially if you're due this month! I read that kids don't potty train on average until three (meaning half do it before, half do it after), so give yourself a break and make this a friendly process for all of you. Unless there's some hard core reason he has to be potty trained, it sounds like too much pressure. And yes, interest in this waxes and wanes. Good luck!

I would wait. He probably isn't ready. My son decided he wasn't ready until he turned 3. Having a new baby can also have many effects. Good luck.

We moms are anxious to get our children out of diapers because of the extra mess, work and expense. But my experience working with children over the years tells me what we are doing when we try to start them too early is actually delaying them from being successful. Absolutely I'd wait until after he's three... and until he's used to and comfortable with having the new baby around.

I think it's a bit too early for a boy to be potty trained. Yes it does happen on occasion, however boys usually start later. And also, even with a girl, if there are too many changes and stress going on in the home, they will not respond. My second (a girl) was interested then stopped when I got pregnant she didn't respond until after I delivered my third. My third (a girl)was about to turn two right before the holidays, I was trying to train her before I went back to school and I read that the children will not respond to changes and stress going on in the house. So I waited until after the holidays and within 2-3 weeks after she was full on potty trained. good luck!

I have 2 older boys and neither was ready to potty train until their 3rd birthday. My advice would be not to rush it, it goes a lot smoother when they're really ready and he's got a lot of adjustments ahead of him.
Good luck and congratulations!