Potty Training Nightmare - Please Help!

My son wet his bed well past 6. Not regularly but he was not completely dry forever till he was almost 7! Some kids are just deeper sleepers. He is an adult now and dry all night! lol... No really, not to sound light about this ... I remember how crazy making it seemed and worrying I would be sending him off to colllege with a box of pampers but they do eventually grow out of it. His dad was also a deep sleeper. Less drinking after dinner seemed to do the trick and getting him up before we went to bed helped but in most cases it is how deep they are sleeping.

Boys always take longer and are older. I know several that were 4y+ before they got it. For my brother, (4y+) it took the promise of a special half his size truck before he got it. Being overly intelligent does play a role in that they've learned how to play the parents, but doesn't really come into play here.

First I would have him checked to make sure that there isn't a medical issue. Bladder is too small; UTI; etc.

For my son, it was that he didn't like going into the bathroom where it was dark. So he'd rather mess his pants then go in there. For that I placed the little potty into the open laundry room. No doors or dark spaces.

Secondly, when he would mess, I would rush to clean up the mess on the floor or furniture first. He would stand there getting upset because he was wet and uncomfortable. I didn't make him wait long, but like 5m until I finished cleaning up the location. Then when it was his turn, we'd have to go ALL the way up to the 2nd floor bathroom, take a shower to clean up, and put on fresh clothes. He got tired of taking showers. 'well, each time you mess your pants, you get a shower'.... it was only a few days before we were accident free during the day.

Change his clothes ONLY in the bathroom. Not his room. Not the living room. ONLY in the bathroom.

Hugs
M.

With mine, i talked to him during bath time and told him that he was no longer a baby, but a little boy and little boys use the potty like big boys and grown ups. i told him he no longer uses a bottle, a paci, or diapers and that when he needs to pee or poop, the toilet is the only acceptable place to do it. He could do it on his own or tell me and i would go with him, but either way that is what i expected. After the first accident, I cleaned area and then took him to the bathroom and cleaned him, but i used cold water. Yes! uncomfortable and not pleasant at all. when he asked why it was cold, i told him that warm water was for bath time only. When he came and asked for non essential things like chocolate milk instead of plain milk, I would ask, "did you pee in the potty today?" his answer dictated my answer. He got that right away!! and then he would start to ask for all kinds of things only to get the same question time and time again. after 3 days, he figured I wasn't letting it go and poof, magically he had no more accidents...Did this with my daughter first & she was harder than my son. Best of luckk.

As for night time, i had them go at 8 (bedtime) then I would get them both up to go again at 10-11 when I went to bed, then I set my watch alarm for 1:30am and had them go again then they made it till 6am when we got up for the day. After a couple months, they told me not to wake them and that they would do it on their own. i agreed to let them utnil the first accident and that never happened.

Give up and wait...not what you want to hear, but it was the only thing that worked for our second son. I was fairly certain I would be buying him Depends as a wedding gift, but he snuck through and started right before kindergarten at 5 1/2. At 7...he still has the ocassional accident. No medical issue...some boys really ARE that hard!

It sounds like you just described our daughter. I finally bought a "Potty Watch" (got ours at Babies R Us). You set the watch to go off at 30, 60, or 90 minute intervals. It put the responsibility of going in her hands rather than me telling her to go all the time. After she got used to going when the music played, we started rewarding her for staying dry between bathroonm trips. That watch was a $10 investment that was money well spent. Best of luck to you and your little guy!

I think boys take longer. We are going through same issue with our son, who turned 3 at the end of February. His sister, who is 4 1/2, was drawing it out until we did the sticker chart. After 5 stickers, she got to go to the toy store with Daddy and get a toy. After 5 more, she got a special trip to the ice cream store, etc. She never missed an opportunity to get sticker after that. Our son got his toy for the first 5 stickers, and then didn't care.

When we stopped being concerned, he started potty training again. He is not as good as his sister was at that age, but he is coming along.

Good luck!

V.

You said when you first started the second time that he did well with telling you when he had to go-I'm guessing that meant urinating too? It sounds as if physically he is ready (at least during the day) but mentally he is not quite there yet. I would have him checked for a UTI just in case so you know that it isn't a medical thing at this point. I would go back to pull ups and wait another few months and try again. You are refusing to do the pull ups but he is refusing to use the toilet so he is ultimately "winning" this game of stubbornness because you end up doing more laundry, clean more messes and are stressing out over it. I think kids have true control over very few things in life and this is one thing they can control.

My daughter will be 3 next next month and I'm due with #3 any day now and I'M so ready for her to potty train! I occasionally try and offer incentives and ask her if she wants to use the potty, but I know when she is ready she'll let me know. Then it'll be over with in a day or two and it won't be a drawn out process.

Just tell your self that he won't go to college in diapers. (Though I tell my daughter she is going to feel awfully silly wearing diapers in college) ;)

Good luck!

Here is a website I think will help:
http://betterkidcare.psu.edu/AngelUnits/OneHour/ToiletLea...