Potty Training Driving Me Insane.

Updated on January 12, 2008
M.C. asks from Bay City, TX
12 answers

Ok... My daughter is 2 this month and has the idea of what it's all about. She understands that when she goes to the restroom it is "whoo". As in stinky. That is for both pee and poop. I take her to the restroom with me everytime I go and she understands the when mommy sits on the potty it is "whoo".
She'll even go to the restroom put her trainning seat on the adult potty, take her diaper off, ask me to put her up on the potty. She'll sit there for a moment (not peeing or pooping) then ask for some toilet paper, wipe herself, get off the potty and flush it.
We used to sit her on it for a while until she went and so she should have an idea that there is where she can "go" besides her diaper. But now she waits until we take her off and then goes on the floor not even a minute later.
I am going insane and losing patience with this. Any ideas or any experiences you can share with me?

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So What Happened?

Well... it took about a week and a half but we finally got it. The first major factor for her was that the potty chair that we had gotten as a present from someone didn't look like the "Big People Potty". So we bought one that looks exactly like the one Mommy and Daddy use and she immediately began to pay more attention to it. Then it took Mommy using the "Big Girl Potty" a.k.a. her potty chair to give her that little shove in the right direction. I've realized as a mom there is no room for dignity.
It wasn't even a day later that she began going potty in her chair all on her own. And now it is no problem for her. She really enjoys it alot and gets excited every time she goes. I guess I really shouldn't have gotten so impatient with it because I realize that she actually picked it up quite fast for her age. And I am really proud of her.

Thank you everyone who took the time to share your ideas and experiences with me. Now we just need to learn to add the "Big Girl Undies" to it.

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T.D.

answers from Houston on

I have 3 girls and I had all of them trained by the time they were 18 months. We gave them M&M's. Some parents don't like to give their children candy, however suppliment it with something she likes. Make a game out of it. If she sits and goes she gets some thing as a reward. We had a little M&M guy and all my daughters got to use it and pull his hand for a treat only when they pottied! Once she was used to it, we started reducing the candy and it worked.

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A.J.

answers from Houston on

The best thing I know to recommend is deep breathing techniques for you. *smiles* A deep breathe when you are at your most frustrated can really help.

I have a two year old son who will be three in April, and it took nine months for him to get the hang of this potty business, and he started showing interest in using the potty when he was 18 months old. (he has just started wearing underwear full time within the last three weeks) Patience is the key. Stickers and small candies are great for rewards. I would give my son 1 M& M when he went #1 and 2 M & Ms for #2. At one point I was so frustrated that offered him 50 M & M's if he would just poop in the potty. I put my son and I on the prayer list at our church as well, asking everyone to pray for our potty training venture. I don't know if you are a church going person or not, but if you are you might want to try that, I believe it helped my son and I immensely. There is a video called Elmo's Potty Time, my son loved it, and it really helped put things in a fun context that kept him interested.

Patience though, that is the biggest thing, she is still young, and showing interest in potty training is a great start. It sounds like you are doing a great job thus far, so just keep plodding on, it is a hard job, this potty training business, but keep you chin up, because it will happen, probably sooner than it feels like it will.

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C.J.

answers from Austin on

Hi M.,

Just turned 2 and showing these signs is GREAT! Below are some suggestions I send out on March 1st to another mom on momsource. Plus, I love KayS's response...

It does sound like she is getting ready. Just take your time with her and make it fun. So many people get in such a hurry then the kid gets stressed, because the parents get stressed and then it can become a battle.

So what I did was get lots of potty books. With my son, I got potty books from Babies R Us and sent him to potty with his daddy! With my girl, I did the same thing. I got her Girl Potty Books and took her with me to the potty and let her know what I was doing. As well, I rewarded them when they had potty success. I kept a jar of "Smarties or Skittles" in the bathroom. When there was anything, #1 or #2 in the potty they would get a little treat! Some people don't beleive in the treat system and they create a reward posters and use stickers as the reward. All I know, is my kids potty trained quick. The book my dughter really liked is, "Once Upon a Potty" by Alona Frankel. I am sure you can find it at Babies R Us, Barnes and Noble, maybe even half priced books or possibly even at a childrens consignment store. Oh also, there is an adorable Elmo toy, Elmo Goes Potty. It is great! Elmo has a sippy cup that he drinks from, then he gets an urge and goes potty on his potty. Elmo even has a potty book, too! The entire set comes together and it is less than $20.00 at ToysRUs. I bet it could be found at a childrens resale shop, too. Once she gets used to the idea of going potty and when get to where she can keep pull ups dry for long periods. You'll need to realize there will be a period of time that she will need big girl transition panites (also found at BabiesRUs). She will have accidents in these panties and on her clothes. Keep in mind that is part of the last stage of training. However,the concept behind having accidents in her panites is that... she won't like the way it feels, she won't like the mess, she will think it is yucky and she will learn not to have messes in her panties and clothes.

Good Luck!!

CJ

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B.

answers from Houston on

My daughter was doing the same thing. Pick up whatever you can off the floor or diaper (pee and poop) and have her watch you dump it in the potty and let her flush it. I think that really helped my daughter put two and two together.

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J.S.

answers from Little Rock on

is she communicating well (like full sentences)? my daughter figured it out right before 2, then forgot about it, then at 2yrs 3 months woke up one morning, took her diaper off and has been trained since than. Actually, i did nothing, she did it all. keep in mind, that was also with a new 4 wk old baby brother. as long as she knows about it, and what the potty is for, i would just wait and let her do it herself. i think girls are pretty much like that. my son, and i know a lot of other boys are usually 3 before they're trained. with a new baby and to save a lot of frustration, i would wait. she's doing good to be doing that much. good luck.

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B.C.

answers from Houston on

I have a 2 1/2 year old who was doing the exact same thing when she turned 2. She LOVED to pretend to go to the potty. Our house was on the market then, and our schedule a bit chaotic, so I wasn't really trying to do the potty-training thing full-force until we were moved and settled in a new place. So I just took her to the potty when she asked, but didn't do much to encourage her outside of that. But over the next months, as she got better at communicating and understanding, she got much more accurate about when she was asking to go, and I started rewarding her with two little m&m's every time she went to the potty and really did something. It was amazing to see how much better she got at it all on her own over time.

We have just moved and settled into our new place, and so now I will have the time to be more proactive about potty training with my daughter. (She will be 3 in May) But I think it sounds like your daughter is moving along just fine!

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M.S.

answers from Houston on

When you do your thang in the potty let her see it while you are doing it. If she knows when she is peeing on your floor I always said if you pee on my floor you will be in trouble that helped. It is still a good thang that she is sitting on the potty and trying. While you are at home I would put her in real pantys and set the timer for 30 min. and let her sit on the potty and if she does not go set the next round for 15 min. Make sure to tell her what a good job she did how proud of her you are even if she did not go, so she don't give up. Good luck If you have any more ? feel free to ask

M.

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K.S.

answers from Fayetteville on

Showing signs of readiness and putting all of those signs together to actually do it are 2 different things. Be patient with her, try when she wants to, but don't make a big deal out of it. She is still very young, and I'd bet you'd have a whole different response from her in 6-12 months.

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S.C.

answers from New Orleans on

I highly recommend you reading Toilet Training in Less Than a Day, by Azrin and Foxx. My daughter was 18 mos. when she became interested, but I was pregnant and did not want to fool with it. When she was 21 months I used the techniques in the book, and she was potty trained. My son was a different story, he was 2, a little more challenging. My children are 9 and 7 now but I used this method for both of them. Girls are easier than boys when it comes to potty training. A side note for when it is time to train your little boy, sit him on the toilet to pee, facing the wall. This will help with aim.

I hope this will help you.

S.

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A.M.

answers from New Orleans on

I would read Potty training in 24 hours by Foxx. You may not do it 24 hours but there are some great ideas. Such as rewarding them every 10 minutes for having dry pants, cause that's what you really want. And when they do have an accident, you practice different scenarios such as, "You're playing legos and you feel peepee about to come out what are you going to do?" The child answers run to the potty and you run to potty, and go through the motions of pulling pants down, sitting down, wiping, pulling pants up, do a fake hand wash and practice somewhere else. "You're watching t.v. and you feel like you have to pee, what are you going to do?"

It really is a great book with ideas on how to tell if there ready.

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M.D.

answers from Houston on

M., my youngest is almost 2 and does the same thing. She enjoys emulating mom and big sis, however, the floor has been a common place for her to go.

I've started only letting her flush the potty if she actually tee-tees in it - ha ha, like that's such a reward, but it works. If she doesn't tee tee, she gets a diaper right away now, not giving her time to hit the floor.

Unless you're able to work with her hourly to every hour and a half on using the potty, she isn't necessarily going to grasp the concept. I'm not ready to devote the time as I'm not totally sure mine is 100% ready to do this, so for now, if she asks to go I'll let her, but not really going to work on it for a few more months. Not that I enjoy buying diapers, but pull-ups are more expensive and I don't want to move into those until I think we are all serious about it.

Good luck.

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R.H.

answers from New Orleans on

My daughter (now nine) did EXACTLY the same thing! I tried lacy panties thinking she would not want to mess them up, I tried letting her go naked around the house, thinking she would not go on the floor. I finally gave up and went back to diapers, and left her alone about the potty, thinking even with all her interest she must not be ready. A week or so later, we talked on the phone with her cousin who was about six months older than her. He told her "Mackenzie, I go pee pee on the potty all the time now!" She said, "I do too." and told me she'd go on the potty now. Went from diapers all the time to panties all the time overnight, no joke. The trick was her deciding she wanted to... and me letting go of the big deal I was making of it. She's been this way about lots of other things too, weaning off the breast, learning to tie shoes, learning to do monkey bars. When she gets motivated, she does it, but I find that when I stress out over it, she backs away. There's a balance there between letting her do things in the way she feels comfortable and enforcing rules that need to be followed. It's like walking a tightrope! But sometimes I've found that the more upset I get over things, the less motivated she is to do it my way. HOpe that helps!

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