Too Early to Potty Train? - Philadelphia,PA

Updated on August 18, 2006
A.O. asks from Philadelphia, PA
16 answers

My son is 21 months old and refuses to stop pulling off his diapers. He has even gone as far as to poop on the floor twice. He has peed on the floor many times. The problem is that he won't tell me WHEN he has to go so I can potty train him. He doesn't go to the bathroom and if I put him on his potty, he doesn't do anything in the potty. Are these just the first stages of an interest in potty training? I am worried that if I don't hop on this opportunity that he will change his mind but at the same time, I don't know if he is 100% ready. I only had sisters-all of you moms out there with boys, please help!

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So What Happened?

Thank you everyone for the excellent advice! I think I will provide a potty in the living room and do the pull ups thing for the time being. After my second baby is born, I might try a little harder but for now I am going to let nature take its course. At night I will put his diapers on backwards (pure genius by the way!). In the meantime, I am going to get a mommy potty training book and some books for my little guy so we are both prepared to deal with this in a few months. It is coming at a hard time for all so I hope in a few months he is still interested. Thank you again!!!

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S.L.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi - the advice I used with my son was this: when he's ready, he'll do it.

My son's father used to take him into the bathroom with him, showing him how it was done but (LOL) it did take a little bribery to get him to at least start and try. (M&M's worked for me and him, by the way).

Every child is different. When he's ready (or properly bribed - giggling) it will be a breeze.

Best of luck - **smile**

S.

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K.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

If the potty in the living room doesn't work, you could always put his diapers on backwards. That could help with the pulling off at night or when you're away from home.

K.

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B.M.

answers from New York on

Hi, Relax....I have never seen a child go to 1st grade in pampers. Your son is experimenting. He just figured out that pulling off his pamper is fun. If he is pulling it off and then going to the bathroom he may be teaching himself a form of potty training. He knows he doesn't like the feel of a wet or icky diaper. The trick is to catch him right after he pulls it off and see if you can even get a drop in a potty. Remember to praise and give a small reward (cookie, icy). I have raised three boys and a girl. Boys are a little harder with the potty training. He may not be ready to sit and have a go at the "big boy stuff" but he is letting you know that the time is coming soon.

You're doing a good job by observing his behavior. You'll be sure when it's time to get serious.

Good luck.

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R.

answers from New York on

my son was born in nov 04 and I just bought him an elmo potty hoping he might want to go he thankfully doesn't pull off his diaper but my neighbor's son who just turned 2 does. I don't think its a sign he's ready HOWEVER if you are! I wouldjust place him on the potty every 1/2 hour and make it fun read story sing a song.

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A.D.

answers from Washington DC on

My son is 3 and still not trained. When he does use the potty he gets a Hershey Kiss. 1 for pee, 2 for poo. It works 75% off the time.

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J.B.

answers from Allentown on

There's definitely an interest in potty training- now all you have to do is make it fun! A friend of mine was told by her pediatrician to put a cheerio in the toilet and to tell her son to aim at the cheerio!! You could also try the reward system. We had to do that with my daughter. Everytime she peed or pooped on the potty, she would get one M&M.

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T.W.

answers from Philadelphia on

Your son is showing early signs that he is ready for potty training by feeling discomfort when his diaper is soiled! This is great because often kids don't feel discomfort because the diapers are so absorbent. A child has to be both mentally and developmentally ready for successful potty training. I know this is a busy time for you but don't expect too much. I would begin by buying a small potty seat for him and placing it where most of the accidents are occuring. Often parents will put a potty set in a playroom or den where the child spends most of his time. Children have very little time betweeen feeling the urge and urinating. Also, large toilets can be intimidating to a small child and he may prefer his little potty. I tell parents to keep a basket of books near the potty to help pass the time while waiting for a poop. Try taking him to the bathroom every morning when he firsts wakes up, and hour after meals and just before bed. Usually you will "catch" him at some point and he will see the connection! Kids usually get very excited when they see their pee in the potty. Have wipes near the potty for convenience and to properly teach him how to clean up. Try putting him in "pull ups" because it will be easier getting them up and down. Praise him when he goes but don't over react when he doesn't. I have found a sticker chart placed in the bathroom is a great motivator! Expect lots of accidents and remember he is just in the beginning phases. when he begins to have dry diapers upon waking potty training will go a little easier.
T. RN

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A.B.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi A.,
At first when I read through your request I thought GO for it! but then I saw you have another little blessing due to arive any day . I would not start the potty training until after the dust settles from having the new baby. Many times these little ones change their minds after something big happens, like a new baby, a new house, or something big like that. I wouldn't make a big deal about things now . If he wants to try on the potty chair let him. Until then, put his diapers on backwords and that might slow him down from getting the tabs pulled off.
I hope this helps! Good luck with the new one too!
A. B.

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L.

answers from Pittsburgh on

A.,

Boys don't like diapers, and potty training boys is harder than potty training girls (I have one of both so I know). My suggestion is to try pull-ups, or taining pants. He may keep these on more than diapers. It does sound like he is ready to start potty training, but make sure he is being trained and not you. I have seen so many momns being potty trained. Make sure that he goes when he feels like he has to go, do not continually pick him up and take him in. This will develop into a pattern that is harder to break than the diaper ripping off. The biggest clue as to whether he knows he has to go is when he hides somewhere when he has to go poop. This indicates that he recognizes the sensation and knows what it means. Trust me, boys are more difficult, especially for "no.2". They feel like it part of them and do not like to see it flushed down the potty. My suggestion is to boy one of the potty books. There are a lot of good titles. I think sam's club even carries one that has the sound effects of the flusing toilet. Read it to him often. Also, every kids show (blue's clues, bear in the big blue house, etc.) has a potty episode for just such an occasion. Order one and have him watch it often. These two things really helped my son. Especially with the peeing.
Good luck.
L.

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M.

answers from Philadelphia on

My son loved the potty power dvd and also read him some potty books too! But he'll let you know when he's truly ready. My son showed interest about 22 months then lost interest until he was about 32months of age. I just kept the potty out and tried to keep him in pull ups when we were home. We call them big boy pants, like daddy's. Also made a sticker chart and showed him what kind of big boy underwear he could have once he learned to go potty. Spiderman, superman, bob the builder etc. Good luck.

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M.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

I'm doing the potty training with my son too and the pediatrician told me if he wakes up dry from a nap it is time. He will sit on the potty and pee only. I'm trying a few different things. I been putting him on the potty every hour and also tried letting him go naked, apparently that is to help them reconzied that they have to go. He seems to be catching on. The naked method works best outside atleast that what the parenting book saids.

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J.

answers from Boston on

I don't think so... I used this following book with both of my boys, now 6years and almost 3. Their personalities were completely different but it worked well with both boys. The forward/ch1 of the book helps you determine if your son is ready with easy to answer questions. If your son can follow one or two word comands like get the doggie or bring mom the puzzle he may be ready! Don't let the title fool you - it does take about 1 week, however, most of the "work" is done in 3-4 hours! my recomendation is to follow the book directions to the letter. let us know if this helps! "Toilet Training in Less than a Day" by Nathan Azrin, and Richard Foxx.

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M.M.

answers from New London on

A.,
I worked at a day care and I did notice that it does for some reason take boys longer to potty train.I have always been told that when they start waking up from their nap with a dry diaper then thats a sign of more control and that maybe they are ready to potty train. My little boy is only 6 months so he haven't had to worry about the potty training but,my sister's boy is going through the potty training experience right now and she has to duck tape her little boys diaper on him because she is expericencing the same problem you have. Her boy is 28 months and she has started giving him a M & M everytime he sits on the potty and he gets two if he goes in the potty. At the day care that I worked at we would give the children stickers when they went to the potty. Good luck with everything.
M.

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H.

answers from Philadelphia on

use a pull up... they don't have tabs on the side and will be harder for him to get off. I have 2 kids and both potty trained around 3 and a half. It is much harder too do when they are so little. Personally I think it is easier to wait till they are totally ready.

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D.G.

answers from New York on

I don't think it's too early to potty train. We started teaching my daughter when she turned two but she never wanted to go on the potty but we would always try to put her on for 5 or more min three times a day so that she woulld try to make an atempt. She still isn't potty trained yet and she will be 3 in nov but she has gone on the potty and sometimes tells me when she has to go but i didnt push the issue because i just had my son july 7th and everyone who i talked to said that she might regress when the baby comes because thats what todlers do with new babies around. I feel that when she is ready she will become potty trained. Now that my son is here we are pushing her more to be potty trained also.

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K.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi A.-

Think of it as a positive sign and when he pees or poos on the floor have him get an old wash rag and clean up his own pee rinse with alittle water and wring it into his potty. For poo put it in a diaper and a big potty w/ potty ring and tell nice try but this is where pee pee & poo go have him wash hands and say that was a very good try sweetheart w/ a big hug. My daughters Sarah 10 were trained at 2.5 Chrissie now 3 REFUSES to poo on the potty but will go pee on it. Please don't worry it's great he's showing an interest- try big boy underwear and teach him how to put them on and pull down. Reward w/ stickers or matchbox car toy. I know I have girls but no matter what he'll be fine. Sorry for your messy times-
I feel your frustration but someone once told me DON"T WORRY he won't graduate H.S. wearing diapers. Not too early but don't force him to. Pull ups also not a good idea in my personal opinion.
Hang in There!

K.

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