OK Moms help? I have a great little guy who is doing fine with the #1 will go to potty without being asked. BUT #2 ,well, I went ot big boy underpants when he would stay dry for 1 whole day and night. Wears them to his little 1/2 day Preschool. Goes Potty with the other kids, can stay dry through the night. Will not poop on the potty. Will not sit on potty and try, have put on potty after each meal, nothing. Finally got fed up cleaning up underpants and said"put on a pull up if you are going to poop". Well, he will take off his underpants and just poop in the pullup after he has changed into it and then asks to be changed. ALso tried moving a little potty to the spot where he usually hides to poop. Nothing he just pees in it. Any thing that you tried with you rlittle guys to motivate to poop in the potty? He will be 4 in 1 month. I am out of ideas.
go to the $ store and let him pick out 10 things he wants, then get one "big" present for him. put the toys he bought up high, but somewhere he can see them ALL THE TIME. like in the kitchen or something. then tell him every time he poops in the potty he gets one of the toys and every time he poops in his pants it goes back on the shelf. and if he poops in the potty 10 times in a row he gets his "big" prize. worked for my kid.
Check out this site:
http://www.rogerknapp.com/medical/pottytrainingrefusals.htm
This site will expand on:
~ Transferring all responsibility to your son.
~ Stopping all reminders about using the toilet.
~ Giving incentives for using the toilet ~ the RIGHT incentive for your son and the way you use it:
"Four conditions are required to make incentives powerful:
1) Your child strongly desires the incentive.
2) You give the incentive immediately after the child meets the goal (releases poop into the toilet, for example).
3) You allow your child access to the incentive for 30 to 60 minutes.
4) YOU, not your child, continue to own and control the incentive."
~ Make the potty chair convenient.
~ Replace diapers or pullups with underwear. (You still allow him access to pull-ups for poops only as you want do not want him to start holding it.)
~ Remind your son to change his clothes if he wets or soils himself.
~ Don't punish or criticize your son for accidents.
This method works with stubborn children, and it isn't hard to implement. Putting the responsibility on the child and the power incentive are (I think) the mainstays of the method, wish I'd thought of it.
A friend of mine bought a few packs of underwear and simply threw them away if he went in them. She also decided that no matter what they were about to do, if he pooped in his pants they would drop everything to clean him up and make a big production out of it. She's big on "natural consequences," so she would say things like, "I guess we're not going to playgroup today, because we have to get cleaned up now."
I really like the rewards idea. It really worked with my older son. He would actually ask for a diaper. I was really lucky that he only asked for it once or twice before he accepted my answer that the diapers were gone and he had to use the potty. Not sure how much longer I would have held out, because I certainly didn't want to cause any health problems. Sorry I'm not being very helpful. Good luck!
The approach described here seems very much in line with everything I've read about how kids tick: http://www.rogerknapp.com/medical/pottytrainingrefusals.htm
Oops, I see GrammaRocks has already given this link!
I second Susan H. I used a similar method to get my very stubborn 3.5 year old to poop on the potty.
I took him to KMart and told him to choose any toy he wanted. I said I would buy it for him, but he could not play with it until he pooped on the potty.
He chose a Transformer thing that had 2 big Transformers. When we got home, I put it on the top shelf of my closet and told him he could have 1 Transformer when he pooped on the potty. Next day he bugged me about it a few times and I repeated that he could have 1 Transformer when he used the potty. A little bit later I heard him tiptoe into the bathroom, sit on the potty and bingo! A perfect poop. I gave him the 1 Transformer and said he could have the 2nd one when he pooped on the potty again. Next day, same thing - I gave him the 2nd Transformer.
After that, I told him if he pooped on the potty for the whole week, I would take him somewhere special. We did a couple weeks of that, and then I was able to drop bribery altogether. He has never had a #2 accident since.
Good luck!
He knows exactly what he is doing, so it may be time to try punishment. First try offering something cool like a new toy if he poops in the potty for a whole week, and if that does not work, than start taking stuff away when he purposely poops in his pants. Stop with the pull ups, you are just inableing his bad behavior. It would be one thing if these were accidents, but clearly they are not.
Have you asked him what the problem is? I think it's time to break out the rewards. Nothing big but give him a super special treat. My son would get gummies or fruit leather when I was potty training him. Is there anything your son loves that is inexpensive, maybe stickers if not food items. Then, if he stays clean for a few days you can go to the toystore and pick out a toy. You were smart to move the potty to where he goes to hide. Does he poop during a certain time of the day? That can help you be more aware of when it might happen. What about letting him watch his favorite show during pooping?
It's been a while since I've done potty training--my youngest is 16--but I always tell everyone I can not to use Pull-Ups. I have six kids and the first four potty trained fairly easily, all by 2 1/2 (and they're all boys). But I used Pull-Ups with my last two and they were still having accidents at age four. Can you still buy plastic pants? I used to put those over their underpants--for the oldest four (the youngest of whom is 22). That way, they really felt the mess and were quicker to learn.
My daughter has been the same way - great with #1, and longer with #2 to decide that using the potty was the way to go. I figured out some special rewards for going on the potty and if she chose to go in her pants, I told her "Well, now you don't get XYZ...you need to go in the potty to go XYZ." Some of the things we have used include a handful of M&Ms, glo-bracelets (the kind that you have to crack to activate and are super-cheap at the dollar store), and getting her toe nails painted after a bath (not suggesting that to you for your little guy, but you get the idea). She has had some issues with constipation and withholding poop, which made it painful for her to go, further increasing her reluctance to use the potty. I've had to periodically give her Miralax, and really up her fiber intake and decrease her eating of dairy and bananas, to help her along. That would be something to keep in mind that unfortunately can develop if they develop a fear of the potty. I've had to keep a close watch on her because she isn't always great about letting us know she needs to poop and sometimes when I notice that she is getting that "look" on her face or suddenly decides she wants to hide in her room with the door closed, I lead her over the potty, make her sit on it for a few minutes, and remind her of what she supposed to do. So some careful observation may be in order.
One friend of mine got her 4 year old to go poop on the potty by not letting him play the Wii each day until he pooped. It worked for them because he was just plain stubborn about it - he's the kind of kid that automatically says no or "why?" initially to whatever you want him to do. So whenever he got up in the morning and wanted to play on the Wii, his mom told him he couldn't until he went poop. He was mad about it for about 2 or 3 days before he finally gave in, and then everything was fine.
