Potty Training Blues

hi i have 2 kids a 4/1/2 yr old girl and 18mo ond boy. and i have been a nanny for 14yrs in all that time i have learned that all kids learn it in time. But the best thangs i fond was for boys is to make shaped out of tissue paper and let them sink them. and reminging with out forcing them helps. and letting them run neked if you don't have a problem with that hope this helps to S.

Mine is almost 3 (in Feb) and has a slight interest in potty training. He does it when he wants to. We just keep reminding him that big boys go in the potty. We also throw cheerios in there and have him try to pee on them..
Its gotta be when he is ready.. do you have some books for him to look at about potty or bear in the big blue house has a video on it.

My advice would be to stop trying. My girls both potty trained - pretty much on their own at the age of 3. Keep the potty in the bathroom, talk about it, but don't push. If you let them self-train, it will be much easier all the way around. I did get a potty training music video which helped without me pushing. I just feel like if you push them before they are ready, it just frustrates everyone. And it was SO easy when I just let them take the lead.

I agree with the others. Your son will be ready when he's ready. The more you force it the less he will want to try. My son is 3 1/2 and is just now willing to go on his own, without prompting. I know boys that are 4 and still are not entirely potty trained. Boys also potty train later than girls do. Boys don't really mind being wet/dirty. Girls do. It's a process, but one that shouldn't be rushed. The more comfortable your son feels with his body and it's functions the more likely he is to respond to you. I started by taking my son to the bathroom every 1/2 hour, and the sitter did, too, just to have him sit on the toilet. If he actually went while he was on there, we made a big deal about it. We've been doing that for at least 8 months. He switched sitters, and started going in his pull-up again, but now is back to going on the toilet. He even tells me when he has to go, and will go in the bathroom by himself to do so. He calls it his "private time". He still goes in his pull-ups once in awhile, but that's okay. I don't know any man still in diapers, so I know he'll be completely potty trained sooner rather than later!!! :)

I suspect his body isn't ready to be able to hold his urine. My grandson wasn't potty trained until he was 3. My granddaughter tried when he was around 2 1/2 but it just didn't work. When he was around 3 he gradually got the idea over a month or so. Up until then it was real effort for his mother. I think that if you just wait it will be much easier.

2 1/2 is usualy when boys START showing an intrest. My suggestion andthis has YET to fail, is to make it interesting when YOU can. What we did, and what I highly recommend is racing him. Boys LOVE compitition, they love to race, theylove to win, so make it fun for him and see if that works. You can go into one bathroom, he can go into another, or you can get a stop watch and time him to see how long he can pee......

I tried to potty train my boy when he was that age, and it only made things worse. My boy is almost 4 and finally decided he was ready! A goofy video helped, some books helped a little and some role play with stuffed animals, but the real trick was waiting until it was HIS idea :) I know it's hard, but it will happen. My son apparently didn't want to use a potty either, just the real toilet. I got Dad involved too. Had Dad make a game of it shooting at O's, but again, I think he was 3.5, so he was finally ready. Hang in there! K.

Don't worry. My daughter is 2 1/2 and has no interest at all. It is fustrating because I am ready for her but the more I would push the worse she would go. I am going to wait awhile and try again. I think it will just happen when the child is ready. Good luck

I know exactly how you feel my son did the exact same thing at that age. There is good news however. I tried and tried to no avail to get him to do it himself or even tell me when he had to go but he wouldn't. I finally just gave up and started thinking that when he was ready he would let me know and about 4-5 months later he did by telling me that he wanted "big boy underware" and he has had only 3 accidents since then. So don't give up hope. Maybe try letting him pick his own big boy underware. Good luck

I have two boys 3 and 2 both potty trained. I also potty trained a 2 year old boy that I watch every other week. This is what has worked for me: First I tried the pull ups, then the underware but they never worked. I think my boys just thought both felt like diapers therefore they thought they could wet them. So for one full week with my two (three full days with my in-home child)....I let them run naked. They could feel it coming....yeah there will be a couple of accedents, Give them a lot to drink. After each glass of water (juice, etc.) wait ten minutes then take them potty. After that every 25 minutes. Set a timer if you have to. BE CONSITANT. This has worked for me three times. Please know your childs readiness and you will be able to adjust to what is good for them. A three day weekend would be perfect and then just let the daycare know what you've been doing.
I hope this works for you, I know you'll be getting a lot of responses.

My son is 2 and as well. I'm a stay at home mom and we've tried potty training a coulpe of times. Our son isn't ready yet, and it's ok. I've heard if you push too hard it will delay potty training even longer! So for now he's in pull ups and he picks out make and print, currently huggies with CARS is his choice(interest is a positive direction). He's physically capable of being trained; but is reluctant. It's all good. His dad has him go before bath time everyday so that's a start. He has Thomas underwear which is is favorite for inspiration . I'm confident he'll let us know when he wants to take on the big boy resposibility. Until then I ask him periodically and he replies no.

I used potty stickers for my 3 kids ages 17,15,10 also for my my friends kids when I was the sitter..Just put a paper with the childs name on it tape it up in the bathroom where they can see it..For each "potty" they either get to pick 1 or 2 stickers and put them on the paper themselves..It worked great..even for 1 that refused to to sit on the pot..might get a small seat that fits on the toilet and a stool or a potty chair just for them..You know it is scarry when your little self is perched on the edge.You just can't concentrate on going when your hanging on for dear life..hehe..:)

R.

I raised two boys and both were not potty trained until about their 3rd birthday - I think the important thing is not to stress out about it - they will pick up on that and try to gain all the control. Just let it happen - boys definetly take more time, my philosiphy is they will do it when they are ready! Good Luck & don't stress about it!
L.

Keep trying, but be patient. My son had just turned 3 when he finally did, boys take a little longer than girls for some reason.
I have a daycare child about the same age as your son it sounds like... turned two in July... his mom was going nuts trying to train him, I was helping out during the day, etc. He just wasn't getting it, didn't care, etc. for the first 3-4 months... then one day, he just started going (1 and 2!) AND gave up the pacifier at the same time... threw the diapers and the binky in the garbage and told me they were "yucky... for babies, I'm a big boy!".
It will come when he's ready. One thing I did notice though, we have less accidents when I take him to the bathroom and get him dressed the minute he wakes up... don't let him hang out in his jammies and diaper to eat breakfast, etc. He knows the first thing he has to do is go potty in the morning... if I do this, I rarely have a problem during the day. It does seem to be though, if I get busy and forget to take him right away, he seems to wet himself now and then after he is finally dressed. Must be something about the routine.

I have a son currently 2 1/2 who is just starting to take interest in potty training. I haven't really pushed anything. I did get him a potty chair when he went from tryign to pull toilet paper off and decorate the house with it to pulling toilet paper off and putting it in the toilet. I even took his diaper off and had him sit on it once or twice. He didn't seem interested in going in it at all. He loved to sit on it in his clothes though...He thought that was great fun! I had his daycare tell me since around september or october that he is holding his urine. They wanted me to try, but i refused because i knew he wasn't ready. I just figured he would tell me when he was ready. Eventually, the potty chair got put in the bathroom and where he could not get it, but could touch it and point to it because it was being used as a stool. I have the added trouble that my son cannot really talk much yet. He goes to a daycare where they speak Korean. I love that he is learning a second language, but when children learn more than one language, it takes them a while to sort out which sounds and words go where and who understands what.

I eventually took my son to Target and we picked out a potty ring together. He loves to try to do everything that we do, so i began to wonder if a different type of seat might help. I held up one that was plain white (just like mommy and daddy's) and the only one that had "boy colors" (was blue as opposed to Pink). He grabbed the blue one right out of my hand and threw it in the cart. When we got home I took it out of the package, told him what it was for, placed it in the bathroom ontop of the potty chair, showed him where it was and left it at that. I never made him sit on it at all. I just figured that somehow or other, that he would tell me when he was ready. I think they started trying to train him at school middle of november...About a month ago, they told me that he would stand there like the other kids, but just wouldn't do anything (promise!) and on December 24th, I got a surprising christmas present. My son went into the bathroom, grabbed his potty ring and brought it to me. We went in immediately and he sat on it and had his first successful attempt at the potty. He has had lots of unsuccessful ones since then, but I went through 2 different potty chairs and a ring before he found something he liked. Also, most rings and chairs come with those splash guards...I read somewhere that using those things is one of the worst things you can do...for one thing, your son will be more interested in "sinking cherios" or aiming at different things that it won't be needed and the other is that if he hurts himself on it while trying to sit on the pot, it will delay training for quite a while. Good luck to you!

This is my first experience with responding on this site. I wish I had something like this when my oldest was a baby! In my experience (5 children, 3 of my own and 2 stepkids) kids will tell you when they are ready to be potty trained. Girls are a little earlier than boys for whatever reason. My girls were about 2 1/2, and the boys about 3 - still one left to potty train - he's 2 1/2 and not showing many signs yet. I always talk to them about it, and set the potty out so it's in plain sight, but let them tell me when they are ready to use it. Good luck - all kids are different, but they all get it sooner or later.

My son is 3 1/2 about to 4 in April and yet to be potty trained-boys take longer. My Mom gave me the best advice just encourage and let him be with you in the potty(or the man of the house) and he will eventually get it. She also stated when I sighed at that -that they can't walk down the ahile(at graduation or wedding) in a diaper. Patience. I heard that cloth diapers or no diapers works well too. It s cold her in washington so I am waiting for Spring to try that method.
E.

Boy can I relate to this fustration. Both my two oldest children were a pain. My oldest daughter refused to potty train. We tried everything from rewards, sticker charts, candy, to putting the potty chair in the living room so she could sit on it while watching tv. Nothing worked so I gave up. The potty chair was still there so she had the option to go but we didn't force the issue. When she went in the potty chair we made a big deal out of it. If she didn't we acted like it was no big deal. After I while she got the idea. She was trained by age 3. My son is another story. He wasn't potty trained till he was 5. He had a mental disability we didn't know about. We found it thru testing done by the school district. He went to a special pre-school and about three quarters of the way thru he finally got it. He liked sinking cheerios and changing the water( we put blue or red food coloring in the water). I hope this helps.

ok well i have never potty trained a boy... but i learned with my daughter that when they are ready they will let you know.. i tried at 2 1/2 to get her wanting to use the potty it was a no go... she turned 3 in november of 2004 and started using the potty feb 2005.. and fully potty trained by march...

My daughter did'nt start till she was 3 but succeeded in a few months. Nighttime potty is a dif story were still working on that and she will be 4 in march. My son is 2 and I bought him a potty just last week and he has shown interest but I don't think he knows what goes in it yet. LOL he will pull his pants down and sit on it and a second later get up and say all done and this will go on for hours.LOL its kins cute but frustrating.

Well, to start off with, you can not MAKE him get potty trained in your time frame. They do it when they are ready and when they feel that they are being forced in any way, they usually rebel against it. It is natural. Boys, especially, take a little longer to potty train. Not sure why, but it is a pretty accurate theory.

Also, it might even be hurting his self esteem if you are trying before he is ready. He knows when he has disappointed you. If his body is not ready, it is unnecessary guilt.

Many boys don't train until they are 3-3 and a half years old. Frustrating, I know!!! Argh! But, I know you want him to be a happy and secure child. Just be patient and don't try so hard.

You will find that it is easier when they are ready.
Good luck!

I had to try every trick in the book to get my son interested at all...the final idea was to hang a cork board with snack size baggies of treats by the potty. When he went and showed us he got a treat. We used graham crackers stickers for #1 and then the big guns for #2 we had gummy bears, worms, etc. We only needed to put threee or four little treats in each bag and a paper that all the stickers could go on...When we filled the page with stickers we went to ice cream on afternoon or evening...Good luck I understand the frustration.

Hello,

It is really best to let your son tell you when he is ready for potty training. Otherwise if you try to train to soon you will create more problems than there needs to be. My experience with this is my son didn’t potty train till he was 3 ½ and by the time he turned 4 he was complete trained. We had weeks of fights and days of me crying because I just felt like I was failing. The DR’s all told me to let him pick just because my nephew was trained sooner or the neighbor kid was doesn’t mean my son is ready. So long story short my advise to you is to relax and revisit the idea later. Let him forget this round, and when you are ready to start make up a chart that he can put stickers up. (my son would fake going potty (you know say he had to go when he just went) just to get to put up stickers) Have a row for potty, pop, washing hands, and every time he does something let him put a sticker up in the right spot. I personally hung this in the bathroom so he could see his progress. He also had a potty training elmo, so he had to potty train his elmo doll, and that helped so much.

I know how frustrating potty training is but don’t push him to soon, as I found out by letting him wait it can make the training so much easier. My son had it down in a week once he was ready on his own terms. Best of luck to

My lillte ones enjoyed blowing out a candle as a reward for going potty. I would lite the candle when they went into the bathroom so they knew they would get to blow it out when done. Potty training was probably the hardest thing we had to accomplish. My oldest boy took forever to catch on. I thought he was going to kindergarten in a pull up. Good Luck you can do it!

i have a 9year old son who was in a group sitting situation at a house..the combination of me training him along with the sitter and other kids being around who were trained were all the help. the one thing i thought really did the trick, was letting him run around without pants on (no training pants, no diapers) when possible at home..and without pressure or stress..obviously there are alot of things that can contribute to a child not getting trained as soon as we think they should...is he around alot of other children? what are their ages? also, being a single mom, and guessing about everything, i decided to be very open with him..including him watching mommy go potty..i explain alot also..i got him a small insert to go on the regular toilet so he could use it on his own too..good luck mom! tho you don't need it, just love which it sounds like is plenty in your house!

I started to potty train my daughter when she was about 3. I went and bought the potty chair and the potty books/videos. I even went and bought her something big the first time she went poop in the potty. I tried on and off for the next 3 years and nothing. Finally it was about a couple weeks before she would start kindergarden. I told her that when it came down to her last pull up she would have to start using big girl underwear. I put her in underwear and about every hour i put her on the toilet and had her stay there until she went potty (which wasn't very long). After about a week of doing that she started to know when she had to go. So at 6 years she was finally potty trained. Not saying that you have to wait that long. So u could try that and see if that works, if not then i would say just to wait a few months and try again.

P.S. Does he ever follow u into the bathroom because that would probably help out a little, like if u explained what u were doing.