Potty Training Advice - Aptos,CA

My kids did not potty train til they were 3. Most kids are younger. Once upon a potty is a great video with advice from a pediatrician at the end. It's very relaxing, the video and the information very helpful. I think they just recommend leaving the potty out for access and not pushing the child at all til later.

Tricia

I can only speak from the experience of potty training one boy. He did not pee in the toilet until he was 3 1/2 and for several more months still wanted a diaper to go poop. The family practice doctor I took him to at the time was not at all worried about any out it. I am of the philosophy not to force the child. Some are ready sooner, I think especially if there are older siblings and if you are at home with them. My next door neighbor at the time (who has five children) told me she didn't push the issue, while there are others who will do things that I do not personally agree with to get a child potty trained. Good luck and remember, if you can live with the situation don't worry about what others say.

Part-time working mom of a 12 year old. M. G.

Definitely wait - celebrate that he brings you the diaper when it needs to be changed, be open to the idea of him trying on the potty, but don't push it.

A lot of people will tell you that something is wrong if the child is not potty trained by a certain age. It's true that the child will be potty trained whenever he/she is ready. I downloaded a program to potty train my daughter and it was a stressful week. So I stopped for a few months. A month or two before she turned 3, I started again and I hardly had to do anything. She was ready and pretty much potty trained herself. Your son might be ready much earlier than that but don't push if it's too stressful. Wait a little while longer and try again.

Hi L.,
I was a little concerned when I read that your child is not drinking (except milk) or peeing very much. This sounds a little like dehydration. Maybe your child may be coming down with a cold or virus which is causing your child not to drink very much. I would be sure to offer a variety of beverages to ensure that your child is getting enough intake. As far as the baby putting the two together, I think that you can feel pretty secure that the baby has not figured out that drinking causes peeing. Potty training can take some time. I'm sure you are doing a great job! Give it a little time.

L., I started training my now 34 month y/o about 19 months. But he really didnt start doing it on his own until he was 2 1/2. I would just take his cues as to when he wanted to go. If he would bring me a diaper, I would go and put him on the pot for a little bit and then go ahead and change his diaper. We worked on it sporadically over that year. And finally when he was ready, he did it. The more you push it the harder it is for you. So let them lead you with it. If you are really in need of getting him trained them make a schedule of when to do it and be consistent. I hope that this helps

I am a SAHM of 2 boys 34 months and 15 months.

STOP TRAINING! He's not old enough! You'll know when he is ready. And then you must be careful to not make him feel that he has done something wrong when he pees or poos in the diaper. Potty training is a scary thing for little ones. They can be old enough to have a full on conversation with you, but still not "get it". You must never try to potty train a baby before the age of two. And many are not ready then. I'm a grandma of a two and a half year-old little girl (who has yet to be trained), although she is very bright for her age. I also have grown grandchildren and 5 great grandchildren. I really do know what I'm talking about. Your little one is trying hard to understand by bringing you a diaper for a change. That is enough for now. So stop worrying, Dear. Relax and enjoy your baby, changing diapers and all.
N.

Ninteen months is very young for potty training....boy or girl. Like the other moms, I say stop training, it will just cause you both frustration. Obvioulsy praise him when he tells you he needs clean pants & still encourage him to use the potty if he's interested but leave it alone for at least 10 more months, maybe longer. Good luck!

Even if he is bringing you a diaper it doesn't mean he is ready...Boys usually take longer and 19 months is really young. I would wait until he wants to try the toilet himself. I am the mom of four - 8,5, 3 & 20 mos. My 5 & 3 year old boys were both potty trained by their 3rd birthdays, barely. My 20 mo old tells me when he poops and says eww if he has pee but he is not ready for the potty... God knows I am but, if you force the issue you will regret it. My nephew was forced at 3yrs and had 'accidents' on a regular basis (nearly once a day) until he was 7!!!

I would say 19 months could be a little early--but I also think that every child/parents are going to have different experiences with this. My daughter started around that time to recognize when she needed to poo, and was also going pee in the potty around 2 years fairly consistently.

What we did was this: when it seemed like she was interested in using her little potty, we gave her opportunities to do so (she never handed us diapers). Pretty soon she figured out when she needed to poo (I don't think she liked having that in her diaper, some of her friends were the opposite and peed first). Then we gave her some time outside and in the kitchen without a diaper because we thought maybe she was ready. This did seem to get her started using the potty for pee and poo.

On her 2nd birthday she had gone a week without an accident. Two months later she started having fairly regular accidents (pee only). We kept her in underwear, because we wanted her to feel like she had "made the switch"--but we had to put up with a lot of clean ups.

By two years, 8 months, the accidents were getting to be fairly predictable (and therefore avoidable). This was around the same time that many of her friends started really using the potty.

If I had to do it over, I might have made the switch out of diapers a little later. In the end, however, it may have been good because she fully trained by the time her baby sister came along; and I think if she hadn't been, she would have regressed.

That's my experience.

I'm the mom of 2 4 year olds, and my short and sweet advice is to wait. 19 months is pretty young to be potty training. I'm sure you got excited over the prospect of it, but often toddlers show an interest, but they won't get serious for quite some time. Don't push it - it will come when he's ready. My 4 year old still sleeps in pull-ups even though he was day potty trained a year ago. His sister has been fully potty trained for almost a year. Every child is different. Just be sure not to make it into a power struggle.

I'd recommend just following his lead. If he wants to use the potty, great - but if not, I wouldn't push him. I waited until my son was 3 years old, and within less than 2 months start to finish, he was completely potty trained (including naps & nighttime). I know lots of moms who try to rush it, and end up potty training for over a year. For me, it just wasn't worth the stress on either one of us.

Hi L.,
I've potty trained 3 boys now. :-) If I were you, I would wait a few more months until he is showing a lot of signs that he is ready again. 19 months is on the really early side of potty training, so I wouldn't worry that he isn't getting it down just yet. The longer you wait until he is showing all sorts of signs that he is ready, the easier and less frustrating it will be for both of you. I trained my first two at 2 1/2 and my 3rd waited until almost his 3rd birthday! All of them trained pretty easily within a week, though, once we got down to business. :-) Kara

Sounds like you already know what you'd like to do and it sounds like a good idea. It makes sense to stop for a while and maybe try again later. Keep in mind that in general boys tend to potty train later in their development and most kids train seriously between 2 years 8 months to age three.

Whether your son is old enough or not is up to you. Every child is different. You know your son the best. My babysitter was putting our daughter on the potty before she was 16 months old. We did not pressure our daughter at all. Every hour she would put her on the potty. They would read, sing songs, learn body parts, so it was fun for her. And after a few minutes you'd hear tinkling. I think our babysitter would also run the faucet so she'd hear the water.

Now that she's 21 months old, we have started to actually "potty train" her. We try to put her on the potty every hour. If she sits on the potty for a good amount of time, she gets 1 sticker. If she actually goes pee pee or poo poo, she gets 3 stickers. She gets so excited to get those stickers! And now she's starting to tell us when she has to go. She says, "Mommy, poo poo, sticker!" And I know to put her on the potty.

I've also been told that Babies R Us sells training underwear, I think they're called Wees. They have padding for absorption but they feel the wetness. So the point is that they don't like the wet feeling and will learn to tell you when he/she needs to go.

And if your son just isn't ready, then he isn't ready. Eventually he will be. I think he's already ahead of the game if he's telling you when he wants his diaper changed.

Good luck!

Not sure if you were asking about getting more fluids in your kid or potty training. I just finished potty training my third child (23 months). I don't normally let her walk around with a sippie cup, but I did for the week of potty training to get her to drink more. And since she's not a huge fan of water, I let her drink 3 parts water, 1 part apple juice for the potty training week as well. Keep at it! If your kid's showing signs of wanting to potty train now, DO IT! It'll be easier than waiting until he's older and can assert a stubborn or independent side!

Hi there, I started potty training both of my children (one boy, one girl) at around 18 months. It was slow going but my daughter was completely pottytrained by 21 mo and my son by 26 mo. With my son I just took it slow. My suggestion is to make it fun. The biggest things were to. Take showers with him, while in the shower make a big deal if he goes pee. Tell him what he is doing like "look, you are going pee!" Let him pick out some fun underwear. And, as it gets warmer let him pee on things out side. (trust me, there is something about male DNA that thinks peeing on Mom's tree out side is VERY cool)I kept a potty in my kitchen so my kids would sit on it longer. When they would use the potty, we did a crazy dance around the house! Also, limit pull ups, for some kids they are more like a crutch. In potty training both my kids I found low pressure, in the begining, is the ticket. Good Luck!!! Some people my tell you your child is too young, but you know what your child is capable of!

Boys have to be physiologically ready (meaning--they can't train until they have the sensation-not born with it) to potty train. One way to tell is if the diaper is dry either after nap or for long peiods of time during the day. This means he can control his need to go. Good luck.

Hi L.,
Making the connection between drinking and peeing old might be a little too sophisticated for the average 19 month old. I would look at other reasons for not drinking. It is a good idea to not push potty training. Just let the opportunity be there if he want to use it. I started potty training my son around 1 year and he could do it as long as I watched the time and he did it without a fuss. However, it's also just as common for children 3 and even older to not be potty trained. I suspect you may have a child that trains early. Just let things happen naturally.
D.

Hi, I have a 4 1/2 year old son who was potty trained during the day and at night at age 2 1/2. I introduced himto the potty when he was 13 months and slowly potty trained him. I didn't make a big deal about it until one day he came to me out of the blue and said he had to go potty. I took him to his potty and he went number 2. After that it took a week of non stop concentrated potty training and he was no longer in diapers. My advice would be to slow down and take him to his potty once or twice a day until he gets used to the idea. then take it from there. I hope my experience helps. Good Luck! -M.

I would not worry too much about a behavior change that has only been two days. It could just be personal preference right now of milk over water. Make it fun and keep the potty interesting and go with the signs he is showing you. Remember too that in most cases, especially boys, 19 months is early to potty train, so don’t force the task. My youngest is 16 months now and she has been sitting on the big potty for about 6 months now, but it is all her idea and fun to her. Even though she goes potty about 90% of the time when I put her on the seat I don’t feel she is ready to stop wearing diapers or use the potty all the time. She knows what it is and what it is for though which is the important part. Good luck!

My daughter also would show off and on interest and capability in potty training from 20 moths all the way until now. She is three and a few months. Having 2 older boys that potty trained early, and all the talk of girls being easier... well, I had it wrong. The only way we finally had success was to abandon hope and back wayyyy off. Eventually, seemingly out of nowhere, (after I was convinced she would be in a pullup in highschool) she just went to the potty and went pee. Some not-so subtle talk from Gramma about not being able to be a "big girl" until she was diaper free probably helped too. Good luck

L., all children are different and ready at different times. Does he like to sit on the potty? That is key. If he likes it, go for it. I have three boys - the oldest was trained at 2 1/2, my 4 year old was completely trained before his second birthday, and my 19 month old is almost completely trained. The youngest has been telling me "pee-pee," "potty," and "poo poo" since he was 16 months old. He started sitting on the potty at 14 months with his clothes on whenever I went to the bathroom. I put him on the potty at 16 months, he went pee and it took off from there. Not all children are ready at this age - but don't let people tell you that your son is too young. Only you and your son can be the judge of that. And remember, when you do start training he is not going to be successful on the potty every time you put him there - and he will still have accidents.

Hi!
I understand your concern, but he might just being going through a faze. Sometimes my son goes through a faze, where he either isn't eating as much as before, or he isn't drinking as much and barely pees. Kids go through a variety of fazes, and as parent it is normal to be concerned, but I don't think that it is necesary at this point, unless of course it stays that way for a couple of more days.

Hello L.,
every child is different and I think that it's fine to try again a little later. I remember feeling stressed out about it but looking back I should have just relaxed because it will happen. We tried several things but it seemed my daughter really caught on when she was around other little children using the potty. Good luck

Don't push the issue of Potty Training...one day it will click.

L. I also have a 19 month old boy and we call it potty learning :) MY learning that is! I leave him diaperless as much as possible and have a potty available in every room and he pees in it 95% of the time. If he goes on the floor he shows me and I clean it up without any fanfare. No biggie.

He also will point to his diaper when we are out and about (which I didn't understand for the longest time, hence ME learning cues) so I take him to the bathroom and if I get there fast enough he is happy to pee in the toilet and proud of himself. Sometimes I say "it's oK to pee in your diaper, this might take too long" or something like that.

Follow his lead, make it relaxed and fun, and don't admonish him if he misses. It was mostly likely your miss, not his ;)

My Daughter is the same way. She hates to be wet or dirty, and would bring me a diaper so i can change her. I thought she was ready to be potty trained so i got her a potty chair and all. But she is just not there yet, so im not pushing it. I would suggest trying again in a few months, he is still young, and he will do it when he is ready!

I am not an expert but I do have a degree as a child care specialist.

Many resource books will say that boys are not mentally ready to be potty trained until closer to 2 at the earliest usually by 3. They usually can tell they have gone that is why he will bring you the diaper but may not have the capacity for the connection going in the potty until closer to age 2. But in the mean time:
1) Keep the potty chair out.
2) Make it a positive experience and do not fret about it as your child will since you are upset that it is not going right and then get flustrated and give up.
3) Make sure you ask if he wants to sit on the potty frequently. One suggestion if you are not self concious is to ask him to sit on the potty every time you or his father goes.
4) Make sure there is a book next to the potty one he likes to read.
5) I know boys and men usually urinate standing up but this makes an added confusion when the bowel movements need to happen. So try to teach him to sit first for all bathroom issues then when he has it down for both he can graduate to being able to stand up to urinate.

L. - I have two sons and boys typically will take longer at potty training. It is never a done deal at two days or even longer. Potty training is hit or miss and, for boys, be an ongoing thing for some time. It's important that you not stress during any training time. Your son will complete it when he's ready and not when you are ready. Keep diapers on hand and be ready to it to possibly take months before all is said and done. Oh and be prepared for accidents at any time....

Hi L., I just finished potty training my third child, and I would have to say that I think the whole purpose for potty training is to teach a mother patience. i think your instincts to give it a rest is right on. My oldest and youngest child both started showing signs of being potty training ready around two but then regressed a little bit and it became me doing all the work with a lot of frustartion and power struggles. When I finally gave up the struggle I gave it a rest. When they talked about it again I just stuck to encouragement and talked about it in a postive way.Eventually they came around and they wanted to get potty trained. You will probably be given a ton of advice about how you can get your son potty trained, but your mommy instinct is what will tell you the best time and way to do it. Whenever I felt myself feel worried or frustrated than I knew it was time to change gears. Sometimes that just meant to wait for a day that I felt more paitient and my child was more willing. I hope this helps good luck!