Potty Training - Lexington,TX

Oh how exciting! You did good. I know it's hard to call their bluff sometimes, not know whether it's truly a ploy or not. But yay for you!! :-)

Hi A.,
I say fill him up with watermelon and belt him to the potty. He won't be able to hold it. What kid do you know can hold their watermelon. Worked with my daughter. And then when she went, we threw her a little party. She loved it! It sounds to me that he's afraid to poop on the potty. Like he's ashamed of the smell. I think you should get really excited about poop and tell him how much you would love it if he pooped and how cool it would be. Just some things to try. Good luck!

A.,

I completely feel your pain. My oldest son was like that too. He is a strong-willed child, and I found that all the methods given by the "experts" just didn't work. So my husband and I gave him as many prunes as he would eat and sat him on the potty. One of us was with him the entire time, and we had toys for him to play with, read books, and kept him reasonably entertained. He was not allowed to get up (except to eat lunch) and after about 5 hours, he finally went. We had to do this for 3 days, and after that it wasn't an issue, and he is potty trained.

Someone else mentioned having her son go bare-bottomed, which sounds like a great idea too. It wouldn't have worked for my son, he would have gone on the floor, but find what works for your son. You're not alone. Hang in there!

What worked for me was the Peter Potty (portable urinal). My son was 4 also. But he liked using and flushing the Peter Potty. They have it at Walmart, online, etc.

Well, I don't have a lot of advice to offer you, but I can sympathize. My almost 3 year old will not poop. Period. I have to give him Miralax and prune juice to force him to. He has pooped on the potty 3 times, and the whole time he whines that his booty hurts and he wants to get down. I just endure it and make him sit there. The times when he just can't hold it anymore are the times when he has gone on the potty. I've had several suggestions to buy him his own little potty, but I haven't done it yet. Have you tried this? Maybe he wouldn't be scared to sit on one that is small and doesn't flush. At any rate, good luck, and let me know if you find something that works.

A.,

My daughter went through something similar. I took a clear glass jar and filled it with M & M 's, put in on a bathroom self so she could see it but not get to it. Told her when she pooped she sould have a handful on M & M's. Her older sister would get M & M's as well. Took a few days but it worked. Good Luck

Have you tried taking Cheerios/Fruit Loops and placing them in the toliet for target practice? As for as excreting in the toliet... Give him a book maybe Where's Arthur. Good luck.

Well I thought my potty training days were over( my daughter is 9), but I recently remarried and he has a 3 1/2 year old who his ex wife still had in diapers. We tried pull ups, time outs....but the thing that worked was making him wear underwear when not at home and no underwear or pants at home. He didn't want to go on the floor. Then put up a 8x10 plain paper and everytime he would potty in the toilet he got a sticker. After 10 stickers he got a suprise(toy). It worked like a charm. And we are talking about a VERY STUBBORN boy!!!!! Hope it can help!

I went through something similar. I solved the problem by not putting any undies on my son. He had to go bare-bottomed which he loved, but when it was time for him to poop he wanted me to put him in some undies to do his business. I refused, I told him he can either poop in his potty or on the floor but he was not to poop in his britches any more. He held it for a day, the only foods available to him were high-fiber fruits, veggies and whole grain crackers and breads. There was a reason for that. After a day he begged me to help him put his britches on but i said no, reinstated my new policy, and he then pooped on the potty. At age 4 they don't want to poop on the floor, and most feel too big for a diaper. He had a choice and chose to use the potty. No other problems after that, and it's been over 6 years. Good luck!

Wow. I'm really not sure how to handle this--My 2 boys were potty-trained totally (day/night, pee/poop) at age 2 1/2 yrs...All I did with them, and my daughter (who was potty-trained a couple of weeks before she turned 2) was to buy them "big-boy" pants (training pants) and explain to them that "big boys don't pee or poop in their underwear". I never used Pull-ups--they are just glorified diapers...My kids never had a "poop" accident and maybe only one or two pee accidents--none ever wet the bed (and yes, I only used regular underwear from the start--putting diapers or pullups on at night only gives them "permission" to pee at night). My suggestion for you is to use some sort of reward/bribe if your son poops in the potty (trip to McDonald's, special toy, etc) but do not punish him if he doesn't go. Children mature at different rates but yes, 4 yrs old is way too old not to be using the potty. Are you still putting him in diapers or pull-ups? If so, STOP. Treat him like a "big boy" and I think you'll see a big difference in his behavior.

I don't think it is a power struggle. I know that many times the fear of pooping in the toilet is because the water splashes up and hits their bottoms and freaks them out. Have you tried the training potty. Once you get him to go in that comfortably (several weeks), you can add little bits of water to get him used to the sound/feeling of the water. AS for the tinkling, I would put my foot down now and let him know that you expect him to tinkle in the big potty and that he is a big boy. That he doesn't have to poop in the big one yet, but that he needs to tinkle in it! once you get that resolved again, then move on to the desensitization training in the training potty. Good Luck with it all and be patient and loving (but firm) the whole way!

My daughter who just turned 3 was similar to this and frankly, I just sat her down and was honest with her. I just flat out told her that I was tired of cleaning nasty panties. I told her she was old enough to understand that everyone, but babies pee pee and poo poo on the potty. I told her it was her choice to do it, but it was my choice as to whether she gets chocolate milk, watch tv, swim or tumble. I explained that until she chooses to use the potty, I choose not to let her have her chocolate milk. She loves her chocolate milk. I had planned on slowly taking away all the other privledges, one a week, as the days went on, but after 3 days of no chocolate milk, she made the choice that she wanted the chocolate milk more than not using the potty. We have been accident free since. We did have I accident 2 days later, but I think it was a test and whent he chocolate milk was taken away again that was it. She knew I meant business. Now during that time, when she did go in her panties, I made her help clean it. I put her in the tub with cold water only to clean her up. I wanted it to be very uncomfortable for her. It worked. She didn't like the cold cleaning nor did she like having to clean out her panties. So, I gave her options and let her find out for herself what was the best way. In essence I manipulated the situation so that she wanted what I wanted just as bad as I. It worked. Be strong and good luck.

A., WOW I feel your pain. What I did was take my son to the dollar store and let him pick out several things. I explained to him that those items were POOPY PRIZES. I told him that every time he went poopy in the potty he would get one thing out of the bag. I put the prizes up high where he could see them but not get to them. It took about four days and all of a sudden he came to me and wanted his prize. He was so proud of himself and had to show me and of course immediately wanted that prize. It worked great. I kept it up for about 4-5 months. On his birthday I told him that we couldn't do the poopy prizes any more because he was a big boy now and now big boys get to do bigger and better things. I handed him what prizes were left and told him he deserved them. No accidents since then not a single one. It worked for me and hope this might help. Good Luck

I agree with the power stuggle theory, based on my experience with my son. Let me warn you it can get much worse. My son developed a phobia with having a BM at all when he got constipated when he was 2 and decided at that time he just wasn't going to do it anymore. (Very strong willed) He would hold it for up to 10 days making it a monumental problem. We were seeing specialists, using laxatives, testing for things like Crones disease and Cystic Fibrosis until he was 4 when we tried Miralax which actually worked. When he would have a BM on his own (without an enema) we would have a celebration. When he saw that it made him feel better and made us happy the situation slowly improved and his bowels started working properly. I think your son will come around if you show excitement when he is successful, don't leave him alone on the toilet until he is ready and give him time. Don't try getting upset with him or punishment, it will not work, he is not trying to be disobedient but it might be uncomfortable and he is scared. My son is now 6 and healthy but he still only has BMs at home and after our nightmare experience for 2 years, that is just fine with us.