Potty Training - Tulsa, OK

Both my kids were around 2 1/2 when they were potty trained. I knew they were ready b/c they were able to tell me when they had already gone, were able to pull down there pants, and such. They both would use the potty ever once in a while but not everytime. So the thing that worked for me was too be brave, pack an extra change of clothes and towel, and take them out somewhere in their underwear (not pullups). I took them out to for a meal and would constantly ask them if they had to go. When we went they could pick out the stall, flush them selves like a big kid. Luckily they both did well w/ this and I never had an accident. And after that I would just keep it up.

A.,

Congrats on your beautiful little ones & all the energy & love you have bestowed upon them to get them to this point!

My advice is: DON'T FRET! As my pediatrician reminded me with my first 3 kids, "they won't start school in diapers." Of course, I only listened after I worried for months on end! With my 4th kiddo, I relaxed. He had not interest until about 2 months ago (3 1/2 yo). We would talk about it & encourage, but never pushed. All of a sudden, it became his idea & we were fully trained within a week! It took MUCH longer with the others!

Please try to relax & give it some time!

I too had premature twin boys that took a long time to potty train. Patience and more patience did the trick for me. I set up regular times that I took them to the bathroom to do their business. I did not fight with them for we were only in the bathroom for 5 minutes. Kids have a very short attention span. If I saw that they were trying within the 5 minutes then we were in the bathroom till the job was finished usually within 10 minutes. After about 3 weeks of scheduled trips, they were grasping the idea of going on a schedule. Also, try rewarding them with their favorite pieces of fruit or cheese instead of candy. Good luck!!!

Hi A.,

I have two children ages 2 & 4 and I understand what you are going through. My oldest(boy) was the hardest. I finally took my brothers advice and I took him and let him pick out a great toy and a package of his favorite snack(he got Peanut MM's, my nephew used Choc. chip cookies) I put the toy up on a shelf in his room where he could see it and explained that he couldn't play with it until he had gone a whole week using the potty and everytime he used the potty i did a funny dance and clapped and made a big deal out of it then he got a couple of MM's. He was fully potty trained in a little less than a month. I will warn that it was a lot of work...he would tell me that he had went and pottied when he hadn't but it was worth it.

With my daughter, I let her pick out her potty and then I took har and let her pick out a couple of packs of panties. She is very girlie and this was a big deal to her. She was potty trained in less than 2 weeks. She still wears a pull up at night but she potty trained at 20 months. I don't know how to break them at night, my son just stopped a few weeks ago and he turned 4 in Feb.

My sister had a wierd notion and it worked really well for her....she told her son that when you flushed the potty it went into a pond and that is how you feed the fishies. She would ask "do you want to go feed the fishies?" insead of do you need to go potty. It really worked for her.

The most important thing is to be consistent. Ask them often and try to make it fun.

Good luck and Congratulations!!!!

The first peice of advice I would give you is to relax. My daughter is 2 1/2, and I have been asked since she turned 2 last July about Potty Training. I got all worked up about it, thinking she was behind and she should be going on the potty, but she was only interested if I was going to. Well, I decided to let it go. We keep buying those expensive pullups, but I am much less stressed about it, and she seems to have decided that she is finally more interested. I would say to let the girls watch you go potty, show them how great it is to go potty, and let them flush it. My daughter loves to wash her hands, so that's a big thing, too. If she goes potty, she gets to wash her hands. At 3, your girls are still young. Some kids aren't potty trained fully until 4 or 5. Don't give up, but just let it go for a few months, and see what happens. Good luck! I can't imagine having two the same age!! :)

You would know best if they are ready to potty train or not. If not, don't sweat it. Alot of stuff I've read on potty training say that kids will do it on their own when they're ready. I'm not saying you should discourage it or anything, but don't drive yourself crazy about it. Take them and let them sit on their potty chairs every time you go potty so they will get the idea, also sit them there before and after bath and first thing in the morning. Other than that, relax about it. They'll eventually get the hang of it.

My name is K. and I too am having difficulty with potty training. I have a 2 almost 3 (turns 3 on April 6th) year old son who was also born premature (10 weeks) and who, too, has been behind in a lot of the milestones thus far. He's health and happy, but just seems to do things when he's ready, not when you are. He too is showing resistance with potty training. He is, on the other hand, using the potty chair, he just doesn't do it all the time. It's like he started, then just decided, "Eh, this is good enough. I'll use it when I want and the rest of the time, I'll go in my shorts!"

We were told that a lot of children hit this milestone in their own good time and that each child is different. That's all fine and dandy, but I don't want to be the one with the 5 year old still in pull-ups. Makes me feel like I'm not doing my job as a Mom.

Anyway, we had suggested to us that you might try putting them in "real" underwear, or in your case panties and see how that goes. They will use the bathroom on themselves A LOT, but the theory is eventually the feeling of the wetness will deter them from just going and will have them letting you know when they need to go. So far, this is not working for us, but your girls may be different.

I hope that maybe even some of this might help or in the very least give you hope that you aren't alone! Good luck!

A.. Your last sentence says it all. You aren't ready. Any of you. So why stress yourself and them by pushing? I am trying to train my 27 month old and she just isn't into it yet. Every peice of advice I get from smart moms that I trust begins with "wait until they are ready". I am giving her every opportunity to potty, we have a seat for the 'big' potty and a potty chair. We have the Elmo video (annoying, but informative) and the vynil pants, big girl panties (which she likes to wear over her jeans). SHe just won't sit on the potty yet. I am keeping it light and positive and enlisting the help of Grandma and have a potty chair at her house too. (It seems everythng Grandma thinks is a good idea becoomes a good idea to my daughter) Why fight? They are going to decide one day that it is something they fancy, and then it will be possible to guide and train them. Until then, keep it fun, light and in their face, all the while keeping your fingers crossed that they will catch the potty fever. They will do it eventually, no need to beat yourself up, or worry or make them hate the process. Good Luck....remember good things come from patience. (Oh how I hate to be patient, but I am learning to fake it!)

A.,

It sounds like you are a very loving and attentive mother. Bless You! I have two boys (3 & 4). I understand that there is a difference in Potty training boys and girls. And what worked for one of my boys didn't work with the other. Stickers worked with one. the other didn't care about that. It wasn't until I kept him naked that he started going on his own...then I promised Thomas the Train light up shoes if he kept it up - and he did.

What I really want to stress is that if they aren't ready (and your instincts tell you they aren't, it sound like), then let it go. They will reach the point when they are and it will be easier. DON'T fight it - because it could happen that you are the one who is trained (anticipating their potty needs) and not them and you will be in another battle. Don't compare them to others...they are very special girls. My husband is VERY intellegent - and went through lots of developmental milestones early. BUT when it came to potty training he wasn't interested. In fact, HE told ME about when he decided to start going - not until he was at least 4. And he had big brothers! So just because they don't go now, doesn't mean they won't go later. And you shouldn't feel badly about that. Give yourself permission to wait when you are all ready for it. I'm not saying it's going to be a breeze if you wait a few months or a year, but it will probably be easier than doing it now. And you've at least introduced the idea to them. Good luck and God speed!
L.

Hi, A.

I had a hard time training my younger son, he was 3-1/2 before he got it, my older son, however trained shortly after he was 2. I tried several methods, but the one that worked for us was, I set a timer (kitchen timer) every 20 minutes and made him go to potty, when he did, I rewarded him with praise and we also had a sticker chart. After he would go, I would set the timer and 20 minutes later he would hear the timer and run to bathroom. it sounds silly but it worked for us, after about 3 days, he went on his own, only now if he is outside playing or having too much fun, he won't stop playing to go to bathroom so we have to discipline him when he does that because we know he is doing it because he doesn't want to stop playing. About the BM, 3 days is too long for child to not use bathroom, maybe change their diet, add apples or applesauce or juice daily to help with that or seek Pediatrician advice since they were pre-mature. Good luck and offer lots of praise..oh we also bought some really cool underwear and when he went to potty one full day we put them on him and he was excited about that...

One thing I can tell you which isn't necessarily potty training related is that if you're an anxious Mom you're children will know that and react accordingly. If you're frustrated, anxious, nervous, etc. all children sense that through body language, voice, and temperment...which in turn 'confuses' them. Calm, relaxed, nonchalant, this is how to approach children. So working on your own mellowness will help them as well. Potty Training....try writing down the times they potty...especially BM...these things tend to happen around the same time and even you can set their little potty clocks by repetition...when it is close to time set them down and read to them. How you get them to stay on the potty is as individualized as each child...the key though is stay calm and relaxed. And of course I had to sit on my own Potty while reading to mine cause they wanted to be like mommy. The only reward I ever gave was 1. Happy Dances and 2. Lots of hugs and praise. Anyway relax and enjoy...don't stress and train. I do feel I need to tell you that my youngest one didn't develop ?the alarm? that told her it was potty time and we dealt with that til around 6 or 7 years old. Her doctor told me it was quite common. And everything is fine now.
B.

Here's is one of my favorite websites. I have put a link directly to an article:

"Toilet training readiness checklist"

I signed up for the emails for each child and still look at them to see if we are where we are supposed to be. This week J is right on track.

http://parentcenter.babycenter.com/toilet-training-readin...

This one is not an easy one, especially with twins. Have you tried using what their favorite things are? For instance, my sister's little girl wanted some pretty panties that had Disney characters on them. My sister told her she would ruin them if she pee-ed or pooped in them. My niece liked these pretty panties so much that she didn't want to ruin them. So she didn't. Not saying she never had accidents, but she sure tried hard not to ruin them. You may also want to try making it fun for them like going pee outside, obviously where no one can see and where it is legal to do so. This is obviously easier with boys, but that is what I did with all my kids (1 girl; 2 boys). I made it a challenging fun activity.

Hello A.,

My pediatrician with my first child gave me the best advice ever..... If the child goes through the night with a dry diaper for 1-2 weeks in a row, then that tells you their "body" is ready to be trained. He felt like the younger children who were "potty trained" weren't really trained to go, it was their parents who were trained to watch. He said hardly any children he knew had ever gone to kindergarten in diapers and to stop letting society dictate how I felt about rearing my kids.

If your sweet girls have been dry, then maybe they are a little stubborn. Not a bad thing later on, but difficult at this age.

Also, if you and they are ready, don't do pull ups or diapers any time, night or day. That way, in big girl panties, they will understand what it means to wet on yourself or be dirty. If they don't like it, they will be more likely to tell you before that happens. If after 4-5 days, they don't seem to care, put the diapers back on and try again in a month.

Hope this helps!

C.

There has been great advice so far, but i'll add my two cents. i have a hard (and i mean hard)headed girl who is really smart. all those potty training books that have lists that say, "your child is ready when ..." she lined up with all of them, but she would NOT potty train. we realized it just had to be her idea. when she was a little past the 2 1/2 yr old mark (just 3 months ago) we decided we were sick of the pullups - so we went "old school" on her and went strictly panties except for naptime and bedtime. it was a HARD two weeks with a lot of accidents, but after 2 weeks she really started getting the hang of it. Now, three months later she hasn't had an accident in weeks and weeks. we tried the "old school" method when she turned 2 and she just wasn't ready - like she would spread her legs out so when she peed in her panties it wouldn't get on her legs. We rewarded with mini marshmellows in a special pink cup. now we don't even reward - if she mentions that she gets marshmellows (which isn't often) than we reward her, but if she doesn't mention them we just let it slide - still praise her, but act like it is normal because she is a big girl now and should be going in the potty anyway. hope that helps!

When referring to children with Down Syndrome, please do not use the word retarded. That word has a stigma attached to it. My son is a precious gift from God and is exceptional in every way.

Your children will let you know when they are ready. I watch videos and read books to my son so he understands the concept. I have been through potty training once already and it is not worth the frustration if they are not ready. Just take your time, enjoy your children while they are still little and this time will have passed before you know it.

I am sure that you are ready for them to potty train, but they just might not be. I suggest that when they wake up- they go "potty", 20 minutes after a meal, after a nap, and before they go to bed. My son was 3 when he finally got it into his head. He is 22 now.

Good luck to you.

A.,
Don't fret about pushing them to train. They will! My now 9 year old daughter had a very hard time potty training. I was hesitant to start with her little brother since she was so difficult, so he was about 3 1/2 when we started. The first time he felt something run down his leg, he understood it. My third child fell somewhere in the middle.

One other bit of advice is to find yourself a mom's group. Online communities are great, but having someone to meet with face-to-face on a regular basis is fantastic. MOPS is for mothers from birth to kindergarten. Check out the website to see if there is a group in your area www.mops.org

Best wishes!

Read the book Toilet Training in Less Than a Day by Azrin and Foxx. You'll be glad you did!

i also have identical twins. my boys are 5 now. they were also premature but were not delayed in anything however that has nothing to do with potty training! they will do it when they are ready like it or not keep introducing it and talking about it but dont force it. you need a break and they arent starting school right now so there isnt any need to rush things! its one of the few things they can control so keep letting it be an option and when they are ready and start to show interest take that and run with it!lol i hope this was helpful and feel free to ask me and twin realted questions at all not only am i the mother of twins i helped to start a twins support group in the town i live in so i have lots of resources. good luck

A.... my email is ____@____.com feel free to ask anything i would be glad to help!

If you are ready for a break and don't mind changing diapers on two three-year olds then relax. They will "get it" eventually. I tell friends all the time, "You know, they won't go to college still in diapers!" One day they will be ready. It doesn't hurt to continue to present them with the option and all the tools (potty chair or seat, cloth training pants, etc).

Girls can be potty trained around 2 years old and since your girls were premature therefore a little behind this would be a good time to start. They won't do it themselves at first. My daughter is 2 and just started doing it herself sometimes. She doesn't like being wet now but at first she didn't care. You just have to take them when you see signs of them having to go and if there are no signs then either set a scheduled time to take them based on when they normally seem to go. once you start this when they do mess in their diaper you just say "you should have told mommy you had to go potty. You are big girls now and big girls go on the potty." Act really excited when you take them to the potty and they actually go. They will be proud and want to do it more and eventually they will want to go on their own. This is when it can be fun because if they are like my daughter they will be impatient and take their diaper off and you will end up having to clean poo off the floor. If you have tried this and it still doesn't seem to work don't force it try again in a few months or so until it takes. All kids are different and it's better to have healthy happy kids than to make the potty something that they are afraid of. Good luck