Potty Issues - Seaford,NY

Hi There,
As far as the pulling up his pants issue, if there is no physical reason why he can't do it himself (ie. coordination or fine motor), then you are just going to have to lay down the law. Tell him he pulls them up and down himself, but a grown up can help with buttons/zippers etc. As far as pooping in the potty, it is very common for kids to not poop in the potty for MONTHS after they are pee trained. My daughter was completely pee trained for 5 or 6 months before being poop trained. She too would ask for a pull-up... the one rule we had was that bathrooms were for pooping, so when she had the pull-up on, she had to go in the bathroom. We always told her she could use the potty by herself if she wanted to. What finally worked for us was putting the little potty in her bedroom (she usually would go first thing in the morning when she knew she had the over-nite diaper on). So, I left the potty there, and said that if she had to poop in the morning she could do it herself and call me when she needed help. Sure enough that was what worked... I think they just need to be in control, and do it when they are ready. Just don't push it, and try to find a creative way for him to have the control...
Good Luck!

Get him sweatpants, athletic pants or clothes that he can manage himself. He doesn't need his pants pulled up and down. At that age, my kids (who trained right around their third bday) used the bathroom independently. Do not go into the bathroom with him, he should not need help to pee in the toilet. If you're not in there, he can't expect someone to pull his pants up and down.
I would get rid of the pullup. If he's not going in the toilet when he poops, then just diaper him. It's cheaper than a pullup that he's using as a diaper, and it's easier to clean up poop as a lying down diaper change than pulling up and down and hoping it doesn't plop out on the floor. Let him have the diaper to poop in when he asks, but let him know that he must sit on the toilet or potty while he is diapered to poop. He can transition over time to doing it without the diaper
Good luck

K.,
He's 3 and he goes to school and knows how to use the potty. So you've shown him well. When my boys were learning younger, I changed their wardrobe to include elastic band shorts and pants. That way, they had an easier time with clothes.

When you arrive at school, is there an opportunity to have son use the restroom? He would have the security of having Mom around and use the school facility at the same time.

Pooping was an issue with one of my boys. He would go into his closet (which was right next to his bathroom), turn on the light, shut the door and poop in his underwear. Pull-ups, underwear, it didn't matter. It was very frustrating. I made it a point to not let him out of my sight for a couple of weeks. When he looked like he had to go, I would persuade him to sit on the toilet. He did not sit on the toilet to pee so maybe he was still a little afraid of the toilet. We also went back to the sticker chart. And I did reward him. I can't remember what he received, matchbox car maybe. It took a few weeks but he eventually started to used the toilet to poop. I also stayed with him. You know, just sitting in the doorway, talking to him while he sat and waited for the "action" to start. I'm not sure what he needed to poop on the toilet, security, my attention... but for me, all that mattered was that he had moved one step closer to mastering the potty.

Try not show that you have are afraid. Show him that you are confident in his ability to go to school and to poop in the toilet. You are going a doing a good job, Mom.

Good luck.
~K.

My daughter was the same. She would never use the bathroom at preschool or even in half day kindergarten. She would go before school and wait until she got home. At age 3, she also had a hard time w/ her clothes. It got better, but even some 5 year old still have problems buttoning their pants, it's normal. She is now 6 and in first grade for the full day and she uses the bathroom at school every day with no problems. Don't fret, your little guy is ok not going in school. And trust me, if he really needed to go, he will and he'll manage.

At three no kid has mastered the potty and yes the kids are supposed to go on their own but they are supposed to help when needed. I do know they can't help by holding it down so as not to make a mess. My son is almost 4 and isn't always the perfect wiper and they will help with that when needed. Our daycare also helps teach them. You can't go from no potty to going both on the potty and not needing any help. It just doesn't work that way.

We were in a doctors office and he had to go (he was still in diapers), and I left the diaper bag in the car. His first time on the potty was to poop and so I got really lucky with that.

I have seen previous recommendations of cutting a big hole out of the pull ups and letting them wear them but put them on the potty w/ it on. He has the security of the pullup and with the hole it will go into the toilet. Then you can praise him for going in the potty. Once he sees its not that bad it will get easier. I don't personally know anyone that has done this but the mom that posted it was pleased with the results. Good luck.