Poor Personal Hygiene

um, I don't know what else you could possibly do...short of going into her room and removing the dirty clothes so she can't wear them repeatedly. I remember going through a phase like that too...but not as severe sounding and certainly much younger. Do you think she may be depressed? Could something have happened where she wants to keep people or boys away? Is this a new phase or has she always had poor hygeine?
Good luck. I wish I had an easy solution...I'm at a loss too. I'm sure the counselor can tell she's not taking care of herself...but like you said you can't force her talk about stuff. :(

This sounds like the beginning of OCD/Hoarding. Get her to a therapist.

My seventeen year old daughter is similar - not quite as extreme but it's well over a week since she had a bath or shower and weeks since she washed her hair. She has to do her own washing, which she does do, but never wants any of it ironed. If I say anything it makes her more stubborn, and she leaves it even longer. She also wears the same clothes over and over again although she does wash them sometimes.She has improved, but she used to only wear scruffy jeans and horrid t shirts. I don't know the reason and I haven't really got any answers, but it might help to know you are not alone. Just out of interest, is there anyone in your family who is autistic or has Asperger's Syndrome. My son has Asperger's (high functioning Autism) and whilst my daughter doesn't, she does have some Asperger's traits sometimes, and I'd always put the hygeine problems down to that. My son only baths etc when told, but he doesn't mind being told, so it's not an issue. This may be nothing to do with your problem, it's just a thought.

This may sound crazy ..the way i handled the same thing your going through. I actually did not wash my hair for a few days and made my child smell my own head so she would now what people were smelling on her, this action did seem to help. I still smell my childrens heads as the come out of the shower and send them back in if they dont smell like they have used shampoo.

I don't think it's too abnormal, her "no bath" phase is just lasting a little longer than most. I remember growing up the thing I hated the most was getting out of the shower and freezing. Try making it a "spa" experience for her. Get her a cute little robe, some smell goods from bath and body works and see if that entices her.

As far as washing her not washing her clothes, I would take her favorite one's until she decided she could do a load of laundry. A couple a days of wearing some high waters should make her tighten up.

Also, don't underestimate the power of peer pressure. I'm sure she has friends and is interested in boys. Explain to her that nobody wants to be around someone with poor hygiene. Hope this helps

Have you tried to just let her be without showers and laundry? Since you talked to the counselor, did he suggest to you anything that you can do?

I say let her smell bad, let her go to school in smelly clothes. Let her friends or other kids pick on her for smelling foul.

Or you could point out to her the consequences of not caring for herself like getting a yeast infection, bladder infection, etc. Have her watch "How Clean is Your House?" on BBCA http://www.bbcamerica.com/content/100/index.jsp

I showed my son that on TV (mind you he is only 6) and made him watch it. They show all the germs and filth that is built up when people don't clean anything (it's really gross what lazy people don't do).

Or you could take her out to get her nails done and a pedicure - let her know how good it feels to get clean and sparkly. She doesn't have to go completely "girly" but this could boost her confidence. Let her know that she doesn't have to be a Paris Hilton to feel great about herself and that staying clean feels great.

Good luck!

Have you found a solution? I am going through the EXACT same thing with my 13 yr old. Going on 2 years of complete disorder and poor personal hygiene. I've tried ever method I can possibly think of and she absolutely refuses to talk to a therapist or take medication. She runs the shower and hides either in her room, in the bathroom, or in the back of the shower. I have found her fully clothed in the shower away from the water. I have to stand over her and watch her bathe and wash her hair and it's a roaring battle. I just can't do that everyday. It affects the entire household because she carries a stinch and the whole side of the house where her bedroom is stinks. She wears clothes several days in a row and sleeps in them. I wash them when she is at school but she often detects the smell of detergent and then refuses to wear them. I don't know what to do!