Hi M.!!
As a mother of 3 children, ages 11, 8, & 18 months, I've had plenty of experience with pacifier weaning. My oldest was what I call a "binky-head". She LOVED her bink....but I refused to accept that she'd be a toddler walking around talking with a binky in her mouth. She was around 18 months old when a family member just came right out & said to her "You're a big girl...too big for a binky. Binkies are for babies...you should go throw that away." And she did. Granted, she looked for it frequently over the next week, but we reminded her that she threw it away and then help her through her fussy times. It wasn't too bad. My 2nd child never took to the binky, so it was never an issue with her, but my THIRD child LOVED the pacifier. She was ALSO a "binky-head!" I stayed home with her during her first year, but I decided that I wanted to de-bink her before she started day care at 1. I couldn't stand the idea that she might do some binky-swapping and sharing at school. Yuck! So I decided to stop giving it to her throughout the day & instead planned to only give it to her for nap time & bed time. Ironically, the first day she went binky-free, it was because I FORGOT to give it to her. I used to have it attached to a bib that I'd put on her right after she got up in the morning. The bib was to catch her teething drool, and the binky was just there at her disposal. So she used it. When I forgot to put her bib on one day, her binky just wasn't readily available. Out of sight, out of mind. She didn't even look for it, nevermind cry for it. It wasn't until AFTER her nap that I realized I'd forgotten to give it to her...and that's when I realized she probably didn't even need it to sleep! When she went into day care, she had been off the pacifier for a week! I was afraid that when she saw babies at day care with them, she'd want hers back, or worse, take theirs! She never did. In fact, the teachers told me that whenever a baby drops their binky, she picks it up & puts it on the counter next to the sink for them to wash off! I couldn't believe it!
Anyway, I think the best advice I can give you is this: You have to determine when your son crosses the threshold from needing the pacifier physically INTO needing it psychologically. When they're infants, it's a soothing mechanism...so it's physical, but at a certain point, it shifts to a mental need...and it becomes a vice. The trick is to wean him off of it BEFORE that point. The baby can find other ways to soothe himself physically...but it's much harder to stimulate them mentally when they're focused on that pacifier. The physical void is easier to deal with than the mental. I think that's around 1. Every baby's different though, so you'll have to try some things to figure out when that happens, first thing being just withholding the pacifier for as long as possible & trying to distract him with other activities. See how that goes. He just may surprise you, like my baby did!!!
Good luck!!!
-W.