Pacifier Issue

Dear M.,

My children are older now (12 yrs boy and 8yrs girl)but oh how I remember where you are at right now. I can tell you what worked for me and maybe you can adapt it to fit your needs. When my son was a baby my husband was away with the Navy and I was quite young but I quickly realized that I could not take care of him the way I needed to without getting the consistant rest I needed. What I started doing very early on was not pacifying. Meaning...I did not jump right up and give him what he'd lost (binkie, blankie or other comforts). It may sound cruel at times when you hear them cry and don't respond right away but trust me...its harder on you to hear than it it is for them. While you are not getting much rest now it is a good time to try waiting it out. There is no harm in letting the baby fuss it out some without giving something to pacify. It could take a few days or weeks but each time you try (and time it) the baby will fuss less and less and before you know it he or she will be able to comfort themselves because they'll know that when its serious and they really need you you are right there. The first time you get a decent nights sleep you'll be happy you tried this out. Sometimes the baby can fall out of the pattern either from new surroundings or maybe having had a cold but be steadfast and you'll be a better more relaxed Mommy with the rest you need. My son had a bed time of 8 and then I had time to regroup for the next day! Its a wonderful thing and my children both love there sleep to this day. They had wonderful bedtime routines and still do! Give it a try and let me know if it works!! Best Regards, D.

M.,
Been there...Both of my children were breastfed babies. They both started sleeping through the night (with a few exceptions) by the time they were 4 months old. The key for me was making sure they got enough into them during the day. Babies stop sleeping because they are full around 4-6 months of age and begin sleeping because they are tired.
They were also both "binky" babies. My cure for the middle of the night lost binky...I always had several binkys in the crib. That way they could find it themselves and get it back in. my daughter was harder with this then my son, but it worked.
Good Luck, sleepless nights take their toll on you. Get your rest and take care of yourself!!
S.

I see that you received alot of advice. Just wanted to say that I know it is a whole different ballgame when you share a room. Even if replacing the binky or breastfeeding immediately will only keep him knowing you will run as soon as he makes a peep and delay any progress, sometimes it is the easiest thing so that everyone gets some sleep.

We had trouble with the same issue, and now that we have resolved it, if she loses binky or wakes up, she soothes herself back into sleep. Once you reach this point, it is wonderful. Good luck!!!

Hi M.-
Is your child eating any cereal yet? If your baby was a little fuller at night..maybe that would stop the every 4 hrs of breastfeeding. I fed my daughter cereal a little earlier than what my ped MD recommended. I'm so sorry about the lack of sleep-a full night would do wonders for you!!! Good Luck!!!

All I can say is give it time I did not breast feed but I did use the pacifier and I believe that somewhere between 8 and 9 months my son would finally find his and stick it back in on his own. I would maybe stick a couple more in their bed to see if they will find it.

From: J. K
I had that problem with my daughter. I had to use the " crying it out" method. Its seems very much like torture at first but it worked. Eventually it became less and less until my daughter stopped crying when she knew I was not coming in to replace the binky or give her a bottle. I also strted using this nice story about how she needed to give her binkys to the binky fairy for other little babys because she was getting bigger and didn't need them anymore that was about age 1 or so and she actually did well. Now potty training is my new night mare!

I dont know what to tell you about the binky because we never used one. But a breastfed baby waking several times at night is perfectly normal! This will help your supply stay up, help keep "aunt flow" at bay and help him regulate his sleep patterns. I think its great that you "share sleep"! Try nursing him instead of giving him a binky when he wakes. It may be an issue that he needs some warm milk (which has sleep inducing hormones in it) to help him fall asleep and stay asleep better. Maybe he won't wake so much when he gets more milk in his little tummy! :)

I am having the exact same problem. My son is 7.5 months old and he still wakes every 2 hours to nurse. ive just recently stopped nursing him all night, just 3 weeks ago and only go in once to nurse him around midnight and then again around 5 or 6 am...just last week i stopped going in to give him a pacifier and he's still fussing and crying a bit but its only for a few minutes then he goes back to sleep. My friends who nursed have all told me that he may want to nurse for comfort, not because he's hungry and that I should just stop. My ped says he may still be hungry because breastmilk isnt as thick as formula, but you know, he's my little baby and he will only be little for a short time so I just go to him when he needs me. I am also feeding him 3 very big meals during the day so ...I feel your pain, I havent slept for more than 3 hours at a time in 8 months :) Feel free to email me if you want to talk more. D.

Breast milk does not stay with children as long as formula, so the feedings are completely normal.

As far as the binky goes, it is his comfort, and he just cant seem to keep ahold of it. As much of a pain as it is getting up just to find the binky, I think it's normal and as he continues to grow and have more cntrol you will have to do this less and less. Try keeping spares around so instead of digging for teh old on you can pop a new one in his mouth and make it back to bed as quickly as possible. This will pass, you will sleep a whole night again sometime soon ;)