Does it work? For how long?
Baby #2 is due in April / May and we really don't have a nursery solution yet. We have the bedrooms, but the way they're configured in the house (and the distribution of prime closet space =) gives me pause about getting her into her own before it's absolutely necessary.
We're prepared to have her in a bassinet in our room for awhile and then move her into the crib in my son's room. His room has plenty of room for his twin bed and the crib as well as storage, etc.
My son is 3yo. I feel bad bc his room is decorated w/the dinosaurs he picked out and I don't want to change it because I don't want to "take it back" from him just because his sister is here...I just can't imagine that helping the transition to having a new baby. I feel like he'll feel like his stuff is threatened and yet there is much I would like them to share rather than getting new stuff or totally upending the house. So I guess my question is...for how long can we expect that sharing his bedroom will work?
While we're at it, I'll take any general pointers on easing the introduction of the new baby into our house! My son is a sweetheart and a big helper, but I'm worried about being able to be just as "there for him" as I always have been so he doesn't feel threatened.
Thanks as always!
ETA: I wouldn't make my son leave his room, it would be a share plan. I was thinking we'd just keep his decor since she'll be too young to notice for awhile, right? Dunno...
Great, thanks everyone!
I would think a shared bedroom would work until one of the children hit puberty and began to feel uncomfortable with it.
Why would a girl have a problem with dinosaurs?
Kids can share rooms until puberty. Then, if possible, separate is better. But, I know people my age that shared a room with an opposite gender sibling until they left for college (maybe a sheet hung up in the middle of the room). You make do with what you have.
My two stepkids shared until the oldest was 11 (she was 8), then we were able to finish the basement and give him his own room.
One more for "Keep the Dinos!". Plus if you really can give her her own room and just share a closet from another room for her then go for it. She's not going to care where her things are kept. If you can have her in another room, I feel, would be better since babies wake up in the night and they're not quiet about it, your son will be disturbed. Heck, mine are in separate rooms and my daughter(6yo) still complains that she can hear her brother(5months) when he cries.
If you really don't have the room, then you do what you have to do. They can share as long as you need them to, but if you don't want complaints moving her before he's...10yo maybe, would be a good idea. :)
don't change the decor in his room until he gets sick of it, dinosaurs are fine for a girl while fairies and princesses aren't quiet so accepted for a boy. wait for the room sharing until she sleeps mostly through the night so that it doesn't disturb his routine as well, and it should work until well until it stops working.. (i know that isn't helpful). If they get along really well it could work until he's 10? ish, if they have more differences it might only last until he's 6. you won't really know until they have their relationship and you see how they interact with each other.
My two children are now ages 9 and 6 and they shared a bedroom until last year prior to us moving to a larger place to where they could have their own bedrooms. My daughter adapted well to having her brother around when he was born. From the moment he was here that was HER brother and HER friend.....they're still that way.
There's always going to be adapting going on between siblings and things may not always go well but I highly doubt that you'll have too much hardship being there for your son. The world is going to change to for him as it will for you all with your new addition; this doesn't mean it will be a bad thing at all. Try to include your son as much as possible so that when there are times that he cannot be a part of things(for whatever reason)he will likely have a good p.o.v. about it. I'm not being naeive and saying a 3 year old won't have meltdowns when it comes to life changes but know that so long as you do your best it will all work out. :)
Congratulations and best of luck on this new endeavor.
my brother and i shared a room. he moved with my grandparents when he was 14. our room was big enough so we have our own space at each side. my side has backstreet boys posters and his side was full of different local bands posters.
My sister's kids are 6 (boy) and 3 (girl) and they have been sharing a room for about a year. The boy has his Cars stickers up on the walls, and when his little sister moved in, she brought her butterflies and fairies with her. Her stickers are over her bed, his are over his.
I don't think you need to worry about splitting them up any time soon. As they get older and privacy becomes more of an issue you can be sure that they are not changing at the same time so they have privacy.
My granddaughter and grandson shared a room until the granddaughter was aware of her body and wanted privacy at 11 or so and her brother was 8.
They tried having my grandson share a room with the baby but it didn't work because she woke him up with her moving around and making noises. She was a year old. So my granddaughter now shares a room with the baby and it's working well. The room is decorated for my older granddaughter. As you say the baby doesn't care. It is still feminine tho.
I agree not to change the decor. Keep it as your son's room which he is sharing with little sister. You could still use baby girl bedding, tho.
Amy:
I didn't have this decision to make. I don't know how your house is configured, however, I would not move my son out of his room because his baby sister is coming...if you have the rooms - I would give her her own room and make the closet space work out.
Having a second is hard sometimes as you don't want to take that "specialness" away from the first one...there is more love to go around!! I promise!!!
I kept my children in separate rooms until my younger son wanted to be out of the crib. Then I put them in the same room. I have to admit that I would not have wanted the baby with my older son. I'm pretty sure that he would have tried to "play" with the baby and woken him up in the middle of the night. Once the baby was old enough to be out of the crib, it worked much better to let them be together. I don't know if you can somehow put the baby somewhere else until he's a little bigger, but that's what I would try to do.
Dawn
My children (5.5 year old daughter and 3.5 year old son) have been sharing a bedroom since he turned 2 months old. He was a great sleeper (she was not) and neither really woke each other up THAT much. There were times when it DID happen but not always.
My daughter's decor was pink/brown and we just added in blue/brown for my son. So I'd say keep the dinos and get some bedding for her and maybe play up the softer colors in it (if there is green, maybe get her green bedding and hang some bird type dinos over her bed (stickers or mobile).
We are going to be building a bedroom in the basement in the fall for both of our kids to share as we're expecting a third child (only have two bedrooms). The second bedroom is very small and we plan on having the baby in there for 2 years then depending on his/her sex, moving the baby downstairs and sharing with his/her brother or sister and allowing the other sibling to move back upstairs to their 'own' room. However, my kids really enjoy sharing a room and I have a feeling they will want to until one of them feels the need to have their own private space.
As far as making your son a part of the birth/new baby, buy a 'gift' from the baby so that when he comes to the hospital, you have something for him to open from the baby. Also when you need to take care of the baby (feed/change/put down for a nap), try to get him engaged in something the baby is too SMALL to do "would you like a cartoon? Baby is too young for that yet but you are big!" Or "How about a pudding after I change baby? She can't eat that yet but you can!" Have him sit next to you while you are feeding and read to him or color (we did A LOT of coloring when my son was born and my daughter was 2!!!). And it's okay to watch cartoons if you need some down time to relax while feeding the baby, rest, etc. Just being next to your son and being WITH him will be good!
Keep the dinos! Dinosaurs are cool for girls too. My 3-year-old neice has had me make her dinosaur cakes for her last two birthdays.
Anyway...no joke my SD is 15 and my oldest son is 14 and they *still* share a room because we've had no other space. We are FINALLY starting construction on a 4th bedroom in our basement next weekend so my oldest son will move down there, SD will move into the little boys' room and they'll move into the room the big kids share. By the end of March the teenagers will have their own space. I know it sounds creepy but they don't use the room for anything other than sleeping and storing clothes so it is what it is. Anyway...my example is a bit extreme but you do what you have to do. Nothing wrong with having siblings share a room, even of the opposite gender.
My kids shared a bedroom for about 4 years. My son was about 4 when sister came along. We had the crib in the room all along and so it was easy to put sister in the room after she was about six months old.
When we moved they got to pick their rooms and were on the same side of the house with their bath.
So don't fret about it at this age. Get a few baby dinos and softer colors and call it good for the next three years or sol. Baby won't care.
the other S.
PS In the olden days many kids shared rooms and they got along.
My kids are 5 and 7 and they still share a room. My son who is 5 is totally okay with it, but my daughter who is turning 8 soon wants her own room, so we are moving to a 3 bedroom house and the kids will have their own rooms. I suspect even tho she wants her own room it may be a difficult transition. And my son is not going to be happy being alone. I think my daughter will adjust quickly and love having her own room. But for the last 5 years they have shared and until recently they have been fine with it. I had a girl theme, and the room is still purple with hello kitty and ponies on the walls. However by my sons bed, I put Thomas stickers up when he was older and he has been fine with everything! It isn't as hard as it seems now. It will be fine, and you won't have to do much other than put the crib in there for now.
