One Child or Two?

I am struggling with the same thoughts. I have an almost 3 yr old, and have been trying to get pregnant again. I concieved him through IVF, and have not had the same success with the subsequent infertility treatments. So, I am going to try again, but at the same time I'm trying to accept that I may just have one child. I think once kids grow up, cousins are not as close as they once were as kids. I see in my own situation that I am close to my siblings, but my relationship with my cousins are almost non existant and we used to be very close. So I get sad when I think that my son may be the only child, and not have too many people sorrounding him when he is older. I say if you are willing to adopt, then there is no rush. A one year old is a hand full, and he deserves your undivided attention. You can visit the adption option in a year or two. Good luck

I am an only child, and I am so close with my parents (due in part to being an only child) that I worry what will happen when they are gone, but I saw my FIL go through it - he's also an only child, and he had the support from his family and good friends. That is very meaningful.

There is a lot to be said of being an only child - only children benefit in so many ways, and really grow as people in ways that siblings do not. If he's an only child, he will have friends of all ages with which to share his life and celebrate and suffer with him, oftentimes in ways that siblings might not.

If you're meant to have other children, you will, but don't worry about him being an only. He will be fine.

Obviously this is entirely your decision, and I believe you will get a lot of strong opinions on this topic.

Whenever I mention that I might not have any more children people like to tell me that I have to have more than 1 child because otherwise he'll be alone once my husband and I are gone. I believe that he will make lots of friends and hopefully have a family of his own one day.

I am much closer to 2 of my girlfriends than I am with my brother. One of my girlfriends does not speak to her only brother at all.

My only point is that just because you have another child does not guarantee that they will be close later in life, although you hope they will. My brother and I don't have anything at all in common. We are happy to see each other when we are in the same town. We don't have anything to talk about unless we want to talk about my parents.

My opinion is the only reason to have a child is if you and your husband want a child and feel in your hearts that it is right. I don't think you should logically decide to have a child for reasons x, y, or z.

(I am constantly being told that I need to have another child soon, for all these different reasons that others think I need to have a child. And I need to try for a girl. I have put a lot of thought into this subject myself - so I know exactly where you are coming from.)

My 2nd daughter is currently dating a guy who's an only child. She's one of 4 kids so she has little background in being the only kid around. She observed that he has a ton of friends and his friends are his substitute brothers. He's always going out to visit with everyone. She on the other hand has a close circle of friends and really doesn't go out as much. Why? She thinks it's because she had sisters and a brother at home to play with. Lonely? Grab a sibling, pop some popcorn, and watch a movie.

I think there are pros and cons to both but please know that your child will not suffer no matter what decission you make.