Hi T., I understand you are very frustrated and need to rant. It does sound like he has pretty much checked out of this marriage.
But, please, before you do ANYTHING, go to a consult with a family law attorney. Many will offer a free consult, but keep in mind you get what you pay for. Pick one out of the phone book if you have to.
Most will charge a small-ish fee that will be used towards their overall fee if you retain them. $200-400 I'd say.
Then you will better understand your rights and responsibilities in the event of separation or divorce, ok? Write down your questions, find the answer to all your What Ifs. Every situation is different, so it's hard for us to tell you how it might be for you.
Another positive effect of this, is you may feel like you finally have someone on your side.
I see no need to tell him about this meeting, especially if he tends to get angry.
Until then, lay low, ok? Go through the motions, I know you have Just About Had It, but it's clear communication between you has already broken down completely.
Be good to yourself, maybe go see your own counselor, ok?
:)