Odd Facebook Message Sent by Husband

Updated on April 15, 2010
M.S. asks from Palo Alto, CA
22 answers

I'm curious. Now I know that facebook sends spam from people that don't know they are sending it to people on another persons friends list. I am always getting out of character messages from friends who tell me they didn't send it. Can facebook spam to people who are not on your friends list and send odd messages? There was no link for anyone to click on anything which is what I've normally dealt with when it came to spam. They try to lead you to some outside place so they can infect your computer with a virus. Just an odd inappropriate message was sent. My husband swears up and down he didn't write it. He sent out a mass email to his co-workers asking them if anyone was on his computer. Before I rip his head off I need to know of potentials out there. Any assistance you can give is appreciated. Thanks!

Oh here is what the message said:

Subject: hi Honey
Text: i love you

Those are words from people who have a closeness to one another. I sent a message to the girl asking who she was, and if she knew my husband. She immediately wrote back saying she thought it was spam and was confused. Hmmmm . . . . There were never messages sent to this person ever before. They have one friend in common that lives in another state. This girl lives in ATL and we live in the midwest. Just odd. So I have to investigate. My husband understands I'm ticked off and swore up and down he didn't write it. Men can be odd little sneaky souls so I have to be leary.

They do hop on each others computers at work. Ohhhh this whole thing irritates me.

Background: He has a history of casual flirting online (that annoyed me) so occasionaly I check his facebook and he was aware I had his password.

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M.M.

answers from Jacksonville on

The only way to eliminate it entirely is to get off Facebook. My hubby is a compuetr professional and knows the ins and outs of these kind of accoutns. He is not keen on me having one so I haven't yet. And you are just one more person who is being infected by these social networking accouns. I on't trust them.

1 mom found this helpful

F.H.

answers from Phoenix on

If he has a "history of casual flirting online" it should more than just "annoy" you. If he is doing that, he is playing with fire and it could lead to something more serious. I would definately be keeping an eye on him. Best wishes to you!!!

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J.D.

answers from Phoenix on

I think the question is why don't you believe that your husband didn't send i? Yes, computers can do things because they have viruses and what not, but why don't you think he is being honest about it? Before you try to get some computer geek to explain to you how it might have happened I think you should ask yourself why you can't just take his word for it and deal with whatever your answer is to that.

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J.B.

answers from Madison on

Sorry but it's not spam. First of all, facebook spam isn't sent to people off your friends list. Secondly, it would have been sent to a ton of people, not just 1. Thirdly, spam has a link. It says a lot that you don't trust him. I think your gut knows if he's lying or not. Trust your intuition.

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L.N.

answers from New York on

well, the virus ones usually have a link to it. not usually, but always. it's like 'check this out, i made so much money on it...' type in google something like "facebook scam subject: hi honey' and see if that leads you anywhere. and another thing, when it's spam then it won't appear on the (your husband's) facebook sent items. so if you found this message on his sent items, then it's not spam.

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

.

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S.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I've been on FB for a few years and never get any weird messages except the occasional "reminder someone has invited you to FB (when they're already on my list)"

I think it's from FB, scanning our email addresses and making sure that we get as many friends added as possible" (a bit of a glitch, I think).

But to be quite honest with you (and I'm someone who rarely jump to conclusion, but tries to give people the benefit of the doubt). But this spam you mention is very UNLIKELY. I equate it to when you see a transaction you don't recognize in your bank account and think, "could it be fraud?" Well, the chances are VERY SLIM to NONE that there's a fraudulent transaction, and you just don't recall what the purchase was for.

And you have to know your husband too. Because if it was on my husband's email, I would have to say that I would believe my husband because I really know him and what kind of person he is. But if you don't know whether to believe him or not and are on this site to help investigate then that's something you need to consider.

Btw, my husband never gets any emails from FB that's not legitmate.

Maybe you can try to change the privacy to make it strictly friends only. That should at least stop any illegitimate emails if that really is the case, and he's telling the truth.

good luck.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Not specific to your question but to eliminate that weird spam from friends who did not send it--change your F/B password. That should stop that!

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G.T.

answers from San Francisco on

This is very strange.
I'm aware of the scam detailed below (check this video. Cannot believe you did that on video) because my husband received it. He immediately knew it was wrong because it was in English from a Spanish-speaking friend.
Another one that happened to me: I received a email from a Facebook friend, who was stuck in London after being attacked, robed and sent to the hospital and didn't even have enough money to pay the hotel, plane ticket back... And nearly immediately, she posted an update on her status: "I'm fine at home. Don't send me money. It's a scam"
But in your case:
- no link to click (for spam or virus)
- no action to take (check the video/ send money...)
- she was not in his friend's list

Never heard of anything like that.

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M.M.

answers from Fresno on

I have had the same thing happen to me and several of my facebook friends. Infact one persons account actualy sent me a link which ended up being a Virus infected website... so Yes it can happen and it happens alot. If your hubby is a trustworthy man and hasnt had any reason to not be trusted dont let this bother you.... Have him change his passwords and do a virus scan on any pc's he works/uses on and all should be ok!

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H.J.

answers from Minneapolis on

I have never had this happen of FB but I know of a few friends who have had odd things posted on their account that they didn't do.

V.C.

answers from Dallas on

I am not sure about that. But this past weekend I got a message saying a friend had sent me a gift. This person does not do that sort of thing so I clicked on it to see what it was. There wasn't one and it proceded to send that message to about 12 of my friends. But it didn't send it to anyone outside my friends.
My friend didn't send it to me either it just went out when his clicked on it because his message was that it was from his wife.
Victoria

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A.F.

answers from St. Cloud on

I have gotten several odd messages from friends who have been "hacked" on facebook. It's actually very common. Your husband should change his password and contact facebook about his account.

It does not have to be someone who has had access to his account.

R.D.

answers from Richmond on

Um, I'd be mad as hell. Yes, I've heard of instances of that happening, but if that happened under my roof, I'd still be pretty pissed. ESPECIALLY if it only happened to one particular female, you know? Can we say DELETE! My relationship with facebook is totally love/hate... I love it for me, but I hate my boyfriends ;) It's one of those things I'm learning to lighten up about and brush off. How did you become aware of the message? If your man told you, it's probably innocent. If you found it, then chances are there was a reason you were looking (like you suspected something)... I don't know. I hope it's innocent. Either way, to make both parties feel better, I think it's fair to delete the person... or send her a message yourself asking what her affiliation is with your husband. If he has pictures of you and your kids plastered all over his page, I'd try my hardest to forget about it. I doubt this helped, but I wanted you to know you're not alone in stupid stuff like this! Best wishes!

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I've never received spam from FB. However, someone did hack into my hubby's yahoo and started sending me messages. It was funny, hubby was with me at the time and not on his computer.

I don't get bent out of shape on messages or anything hubby does and he doesn't get bent out of shape if I am receiving or sending messages.

Sounds like you are insecure in your relationship. I would never check my husband's account nor would he mine.

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T.P.

answers from Detroit on

I've been on FB for over a year. I've never experinced what you are talking about.
I'd deffinately investigate more before "ripping" anything off of anyone, but FB has never sent me spam, and Ive only gotten posted messags from friends on FB.

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V.J.

answers from Dallas on

I've experienced those weird messages from friends. They usually post in their status that it wasn't them that sent it. And I recently had a virus infect my computer from facebook.

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H.M.

answers from Cincinnati on

I don't think there's really any way to find out. There are so many facebook hacks out there it's really hard to say...did you get an e-mail from facebook or did you just see it on your fb page? If you got an e-mail check the 'from' - hackers are pretty good at disguising, but a lot of times if you look closely you can see it's from some random person's e-mail address or something else that can raise suspicions...

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R.P.

answers from Cleveland on

Did you find it or did he tell you? and just ask him who the female is first off, maybe see if they had any messages back and forth between each other and if he goes to fb on different computers there is a chance that his sign in stuff was left on and someone else did it, you will never knowm but the question is how much do you trust your hubby?

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S.H.

answers from Huntsville on

In my FB experience, the spam is sent by either posting on several of the infected account's friends wall, and/or sending a message to several of the friends. Not to someone who is not in the friends list. And it is always sent to more than one person. The message would be poorly written/typed and include an odd-looking link. Words are usually misspelled (like almost ALL of the words) and sometimes written with a letter doubled in each word.

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A.A.

answers from Denver on

Anyone who had access to a machine with your husband's account logged in could have sent it, as well as anyone who gained access to his login information.

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J.G.

answers from Chicago on

I would not be surprised if they could. They are able to access your email contacts if you have yahoo, gmail, hotmail etc. That is how some of the people you may know show up even when you don't have mutual friends.

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