Hi,
Now we've got our toddler using his "big boy" bed with a little rail to make sure he doesn't fall out at night. He's been there since Jan 1, and every night at bedtime, we have to bring him back to bed between 8-15 times before he stays there to sleep. We have a good bedtime routine including a bath and some lullabies, and we don't "discipline" or yell at him because he comes out of bed (we don't want to make it a power struggle), we just calmly put him back in bed without talking much and give him a few kisses. I think this is a good method, but I'm a bit weary of taking him back to bed so much (since I'm 38 weeks pregnant, it's hard to bend down to put him down in his bed!!!), and am wondering: is there a good way to put a toddler down in his bed once, without him getting up? He's 20 months, and doesn't do a great deal of talking, so we can't really "reason" with him about it. We also don't lock or gate him into the room.
I've often read that the way to handle kids getting up is to go in and put them back in bed without saying anything or cuddling them/kissing them. Kissing or cuddling is a positive response to a somewhat negative behavior (since your goal is for him to stay there). If you kiss him or cuddle him, he will think it's a game and continue to get up. Maybe try your method without a few kisses . . .
We put a gate on our childrens' door so that when they got out of bed and tried to walk out of the room, they couldn't. They then resorted to wandering around the room and, like the other post, we'd listen on the monitor. Eventually, they would just stay in bed.
M.
Good method, but you might want to add a gentle "No, It's night night time." or whatever term you usually use. That way he knows he's doing something wrong and that it's not a game. He may not be talking but I think he's old enough to understand a good bit of what you say, at least enough to understand that "night night" means stay in his room.
Good luck!
My SIL passed this tip on to me and it has worked both times. Put a little treat in a baggie behind a picture (either a photo or one you draw yourself) of his bed. Tell him if he stays in bed all night then in the morning he can get the treat in the baggie (we used 3 M&Ms, stickers, etc). You might want to start bigger with something he really wants for a few nights until he gets the concept then back down a bit. But it really seems to work. Good luck.
Hi M.,
We just moved our 21-month-old to a toddler bed at the beginning of January too. He got out of bed a lot too and we put him back over and over. Now that he's a bit more comfortable, I'll wait 10 minutes or so before putting him back, like you with kisses and silence, and usually he'll go back to bed on his own. He'll just get up and walk around, but he's not crying.
As long as your son is safe in his room, it can't hurt to let him wander about a bit. We listen in on the baby monitor to make sure he's not getting into anything.
But, more often than not, he'll just stay in bed. Wandering lost it's appeal after four or five days.
Best of luck!
M.
My son has been in his toddler bed since about 20 months also. At first it was no problem, then I think he figured out he could get out. We did have a few power struggles until I just let him do his thing in his room. He fell asleep once by the door, but otherwise has gone back to bed himself and been asleep in about 30 minutes. Sometimes I let him take a car or Little People or book with him and that seems to keep him in bed. He plays there instead. I get the toy later so he doesn't roll on it. (I know this may not work for every child, but it does for him.)
