Nighttime Routine

Well, I know first hand how hard it is to work and have kids, I have 4 and a full time job. What you have to remember you can make quality time in everything. Its how you do it, bathtime for example, while you are washing her sing,she will love that. Bedtime and dinner can be the same. Its hard, but you can do it.

You can have quality time together during your nighttime routine. Here's a routine that works for us.
If you want to get her to bed by 8pm or so, have dinner together as soon as you get home. You may have to finish your dinner later, but at least try to sit down with her while she eats. My daughter eats much better when I sit with her than when she's eating alone while I'm doing something else.
Then you can play or color together for a little while - something quiet, nothing that will wind her up, too much.
After that, we start our official bedtime routine. Bath, brush teeth, pajamas. Then we cuddle together on her beanbag and read 2 stories. After stories, I put her in bed and sing her one somg of her choice. Then it's lights out and nightlight on.
All of this is great time for bonding, since it's quiet one on one time and you have a enough time to do all of this without being rushed.
As for your 2nd question, you'll just need to start the routine and be very consistent about it (I even have babysitters do the same routine). After a while, she'll get the idea and will actually start to lead you through it ("Mommy, it's bathtime"). We've been doing basically this same routine since our daughter was a baby and it has worked pretty well for us.
Good luck,
C.

well V. it can be tough, but you have to make up your routine and stick with it, making only minor adjustments as time goes by. i would suggest this:
#1 when you get home, put away all your stuff(shoes,coats etc. it makes it easy to find in the morning
#2 Let her "help" you in the kitchen or laundry, whatever you need to do for about 30 minutes. even if shes just in the room with you and a toy.
#3Eating dinner together if you can
#4 bathtime for you both, i used to shower with my girls till they were old enough, now they shower on their own, havent taken a bath in their lives!!!!
#5 bedtime stories and off to bed for her. at first you may want to lay with her until she falls asleep, then limit it to ten minutes then five.
#6 after shes in her bed, alseep or not, you can get the minor things done, then relax on your own.

Make this MOMMY and BABY time, NO PHONE! NO TV! It's hard enough to be single, and you have to work too! SHE NEEDS YOU!! Give her that time! You will both enjoy it, i swear!
Good luck and try to rest at night, it will make your whole day smoother.

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I started my routine when my son was first born, but we also had to move in with my mom when he was about 8 months old until 12months old, so it was interrupted and totally broke him of all good sleeping habits so we had to start it again when we got into our new home. I do this:
5:30 pm eat dinner, after that straight to the tub (long enough bath so he gets clean and still gets time to play a bit, usually about 20 minutes), then we go in and get dressed for bed (Some nights I will dab a bit of calming lotion onmy hands and rub his belly or legs etc.), After we get in the jammies, we read a book (a decent bok not too long not too short, ie cat in the hat, cat in the hat comes back, dr seuss is good all around) He usually wriggles around a lot while I read to him but I hold him tight and dont let him down, and I never interrupt the book reading to him, (he needs to know I am not going to give in to his antics at bedtime) After the book I get up and turn off the lights, sit with him in the datk adn sing 4 or 5 luulabyes (twinkle twinkle, are you sleeping, rockabye baby, you are my sunshine, and end with i love you you love me and a kiss to bed). I leave the night light on, shut the door and listen to him aas he puts himself to bed (which does sometimes include a bit of crying, but I let him cry it out on his own. Sometiimes young kids and babies need to cry out their strsses from the day.) It took about 2 weeks before it sunk in to him that this all meant time to cool off and go to bed. The entire process is about 30-45 minutes long but he falls right to sleep now, and sleeps 13 hours through the night. The tiomes might not be th ebest for you with your work schedule but times dont matter it is the consistency that counts. Also, you say sometimes she passes out right when she gets home, mnaybe dont et her do that. It may be nice for you too, but getting her into a routine of the same activities everynight and the smae bedtime will greatly increase her ability to go to sleep on a schedule for the other days, and prevent her from having too much or too little sleep. Good Luck--C.

I recently went through the same type of thing. Since my son (16 mos.) and daughter were born (4 mos.) our family has had really no routine. My husband is a firefighter, so he's not home a lot. I have just forced myself to make a routine and stick to it. When we get home from work/daycare (around 6pm) we all get comfortable and then I turn on Hi-5, a children's show that I recorded during the morning and watch that while dinner is being made. We all sit down and eat dinner together. By 6:45pm both kids are in the bath and then from 7-8 we all watch Wheel of Fortune (my son loves to cheer on the contestants) and Jeopardy. Then we have our "wind-down" routine of reading a book and drinking milk and then my son goes to bed around 8:30-9pm. My daughter follows soon thereafter and then I complete the night by getting ready for the next morning which usually starts at 5am. It may not sound like much, but it's what I can do and it works. My son is finally starting to sleep through the night and my daughter, too.

I guess the major thing is to find a routine and stick to it. It may take some time to find the best way, but eventually you will.

A nighttime routine is great for bonding. She won't like going to bed most of the time and she will want to be with you, its just about that time in her age where she learns and acts out. But, the best advice I can give it stick to your guns. When you get home, have a little time where you and her do something, like color, then you put on dinner (or order in!!), eat, maybe watch a little tv (depending what time it is and what time you want her down), give her a bath, go in her room dim the lights and read her a story or two. I read my almost 2 yr old 2 a night just so it eases her into nighttime more, she knows she gets two stories and then I leave. So after you read, give her hugs and kisses, tell her sweet dreams and you love her and you will see her in the morning, and then leave. Have a nightlight in the room but not too close to her crib or bed. And then just let it be, if she cries just let it go. She will 1) be testing mommy and see how long it will take of me doing this before she comes in and 2)it will be a new routine for her, it will take time to adjust. But it is for the best for you and her. And soon her body will get use to a set bedtime with a set routine. Just like the routine she had before, mom got home and I get put to bed. But now its different and it takes different approaches. Good luck!

Congrats on getting your own place! It's wonderful your mom is there for you. And I'm glad your employer has a daycare so she can be close by! As for a routine, it will take some time but try writing it out first. Plan what you need to get done - come home & have dinner, about half an hour before bedtime, get a bath & a small snack, maybe some warm milk. Lay on the bed & read a book or 2 together. Let her know it's bedtime & you are going to look at the book & when you've finished reading she will be calm & relaxed enough to go to sleep. It doesn't happen right away & there will be times when she is wound up from daycare, depending on what they did that day. Good luck & keep us updated!

HI V.
My name is C. .. I have a 23 month old .this is our routine .. granted you sont get home till later but anyway , this is what we do bath at 5:30-6:00 dinner after that we sit down and read a book 4-5 times ( he likes book) we still make him a warm bottle of milk. give that to him and usualy he is out cold within the half and hr ... hope this helps .. I am very lucky though he likes to sleep .. again good luck
C.

it is great when you get to even spend time like that with them. I gave a job with a long commute to make sure I had time with our son just for that reason. but with it come then the problem of ensuring the time you spend is good time and that you still get to have time to do those things you need to do! What we have done (and it seems to work for us) is establish that "quiet time" - that is the hour or so before you want her to go to bed in which things are calmed down - reading a book, bath, sitting and cuddling and watching a fav dvd- stuff that calms her down and then makes her relax. Also, I have found that I if I ban suger from 5pm onwards, our son goes to bed much better! If she still likes her milk before bedtime, try a bit of honey in it... makes you relax as well. Hope this helps!