Neighbor Kids Driving Me Crazy

Never change your rules or standards - especially in your home. Tell them if the argue or fight they will have to go home for the day. STICK TO IT. Your daughter is watching too.

Eventually they will learn to behave in your home. If not, you'll have to stop worrying about being friends with their Mom. Keeping peace in your home and setting a good example for you daughter is much more important. Besides, do you think they will get better as they get older or worse??? You do not want your daughter to learn from them.

I had kind of the same thing at our house. With the bus, I have told my 6 & 8 yr old that getting on the bus first is not a big deal and that one way they can show that they care for their friends is to always let them go first. They were sad at first but now the enjoy it and even tell their friends that they like getting on last.

As for the part about playing at the house. You need to put down a firm hand and tell them that they just can not play like that. If they do, then they have to leave. It took about 3 times of this with my neighbors and not its not a problem. I even over heard one child say to mine, "Boy, your mom really means what she says." I think they don't get that at home so its strange to hear it other places. Kids need consistency. I hope this helps.

Most kids drive me crazy - especially ones that come from homes with a lack of discipline...however, that is YOUR home and the neighbors should understand that and not take it personally when you set up rules for your house. I tell the neighborhood kids that only one friend per child is allowed in the house if my husband is not home. Sometimes I don't even let the one in unless he is there - that is added stress on me, and not necessary - whatever happened to playing outside? So, when I do allow kids inside, I put a limit on it - one girl has multiple brothers and sisters and they younger and would just walk into my house without permission! So, I put a stop to that and told them only 1 at a time...it's not your job to babysit the whole neighborhood. So - in your case, I would say that they are more than welcome in your house, but they have to take turns and work it out before they get there, so only one of them is there at any one time. You should not feel guilty about this; you have tried to speak with the mom about it and she blew it off, but you don't have to put up with the bad behavior. You also tried sending them home, but as a mom, you know nothing stands between sibling rivalry! :)

I am a twin, and when we were in middle school, we both liked to hang out with the same person. Soon she was closer to my sister then me, which I thought wasn't fair, since we had been friends first. One night when we were both over there, we, the twins, had a big fight. The Mom sent us home and said that from then on, only one of us were allowed to come over at a time. It was like that for close to a year, until she gave us another chance to be in the house together and we proved that we could get along.
M.

It sounds like your neighbor friend does not discipline her children as you do yours. You probably cannot change this. But you can put limits on how often the children come to your home. Social contagion is real. If you do not want your six year old daughter to pick up their fighting ways, you will have to limit her time with them. Invite them to church. Maybe that will help. Pray for wisdom. AF