Need Help with 22 Month Olds Wacky Bed Time Routine!!

You have gotten a lot of good advice here and this may not apply at all but I wanted to share it for what it's worth. My 2-year old daughter used to wake many times in the night since she was a baby. She has allergies so in the past couple of weeks I have cut out or way back on dairy and it seems to have done the trick. She now sleeps through the night.

Well, T., I dont envy you right now. Yikes! I have a 2 year old and she got into the habit of waking several times a night just to wake up after we had been waking her once a night during night time potty training. She would drag out bedtime til 11 some nights by calling for us or crying for somehting/anything silly. SO, while I was out scrapbooking at our local church for an evening my husband let her cry it out. He did tell her that he would not be going back in the room for anything. He made sure she used the potty and that she had her usual bedtime lovies with her and he made sure to pray with her like we always do and that she had her mandatory rendition of Twinkle Little Star before he left the room. He said she SCREAMED her head off for about an hour but he just went to the kitchen with his computer and blasted his Itunes...lol. He only did it because I just kept putting it off and it did start affecting her behavior because she was not getting her sleep. I would go to the hunting/weapon section of your local store and buy your hubby some noise protection for his ears. Sorry to say but he sounds like he is being a bigger baby than your actual baby. Just kidding!! I know he is your husband and you surely love him but if he loves you at all he will deal with this for a few nights so that you BOTH can have a decent night. I hope something works out for you! Stay strong and know that you ARE mom!!

PS- About the paci, we got rid of paci by about 6 months old with both of our girls. I have friends that have limited it to only naps and bedtimes and then just bed and then all together.

Maybe offer her a little snack before bed with a little milk. She may be waking with true hunger. If she wakes during the night, offer her only water. My son who is 3 still gets a little snack on the nights he does not eat a good dinner. At 2, for a short period of time he delayed bed time by asking for a million things. We made sure he had a snack and had his cup of water for his bed side before we tucked him in.

I know their are some nights when I wake up extremely thirsty, so I get up and get a glass of water and then settle back in to bed. I eat enough during the day and at dinner that I usually do not wake up hungry. Just something to think about.

If she was a tad older, I would recommend putting the 2 girls in the same room. The younger one would probably sleep better.

Good luck to you ;)

It may sound mean but when you get rid of the paci don't give in to the drink or coming to the room when she wakes. She is playing you and she is winning. This will be hard on both of you but it will not not long maybe a few nights. Let the other people in the family and the neighbors know what you you are doing so that they will understand the crying. It will hurt both of you, I know been there but it does work.
Good luck

I've noticed my 17 month old goes to sleep better if he knows that his 3 year old brother is going to bed too, and that their routines are similar or the same. They both get pjs on, brush teeth together (then the family rule is only water after this point, or its back to brush teeth again and my guys hate this :) then storytime with dad or mom. The little guys have been doing picture books with mom then bopping out for kisses and laptime with dad while he reads to the big kids, for maybe 5 min. (If little guy is being a terror he goes to bed right away...its usually his signal for being exhausted) I tuck in the little one first, singing while I walk towards the crib. (I usually don't spend a long time doing this) As soon as I say "Dear Jesus..." that's his signal to fold his little hands and I say a one sentence or so, prayer and maybe a baby blessing. I say, "Mommy loves you. Goodnight" as I cover him with a blanket, turn out the light and head for the door. Tonight I caught him climbing out of the crib. So I put him back in and told him, "It's time for bed" and tucked him in and got big brother in as fast as I could with a similar routine as far as giving a blessing and pulling up the covers. Both went to sleep easily after that. We never started the paci, but we started the routine after trying not to nurse to go to sleep. It sounds long but we try to move quickly for the little guys.
Dad tends to read a long time and wears the older kids out. They go straight to bed after storytime ends.

Send your husband away for a night or two (maybe 3) and let her cry it out

My son is 30 months old and still gets up 1 time during the night to get a bottle. I know we are trying to ween him, but with his sister being 17 months and his baby brother being 2 1/2 months it was easier not to fight. I don't want him steeling the babys bottle and he used to crawl into his sisters crib to get hers. anyway, he got sick with mono and had to isit the hospitol. He started waking up 4 times a night after that. we took him to visit a friend of ours who is a child psyc. and she said he was having nightmares from being so sick and they could last for 3-6 weeks. We started a new bedtime routine and got a special stuffed animal and I slept with him and the animal in my bed for one night and then the next night i laid with him and the animal. The third night I put the animal (dinosour) with him and told him that it would keep all the scarry things away just like mommy does. It took it down to 2 wakeups per night and has helped alot now so that when he wakes up he makes noise and yells a little for me, only until he grabs the dino. We can hear him talk to it and say things like "ok we're better now. Mommy hears us and we're ok"

Hope this helps, it's always worth a try. Also my husband is a huge grump when he is woke up in the middle of the night so I know where you are coming from. I find it best to tell him to go back to bed otherwise the little talking becomes screaming on both ends.

i agree - she is playing you!
tell your husband and daughter that there is going to be a couple of rough nights and they will have to deal with it.
offer her her last drink of milk just before bed, then tell her there is no more till morning.
when she wakes up and screams, go in and pat her back, lay her back down, say its time to go back to sleep and leave - of man will she ever scream then!!, you will have to do this several times for the first night, probably a couple more the second and third, then she will get the message and sleep through.
sometimes a disturbance in routine or illness can trigger sleep problems - but you can get through it.
i had to do this with my daughter after we went on a trip to the uk. when she came back she would wake every 2 hours wanting to feed, so i had to do the above.
it was rough for a couple of nights but it is worth it.
.
she sounds like she has a strong personality and its hard to deal with stubborn children - but you are stronger - you are the mom - let her know who is boss! - be persistant and always act in the same way so she feels secure, dont give in and lie in the bed with her.

Hi,

Not sure if this will help at all.... but my son gets out of his routine every now and again and I end up getting up at all hours of the night to calm him down so my husband can sleep.

What i do now is i sneak in after he has gone to sleep and put a sippy cup of water in a corner of his crib. I also put a sippy cup int he same corner at nap times so he can see where the cup is. it takes a little while of me getting up to give him the cup and then he realises it is there and finds it himself during the night (make sure it is a very well sealed cup as you don't want to be changing all the bedding during the night)

I also tell him that his waking up at all hours is making mommy sick and then i can't play with him during the day. So if he sleeps all through the night and gets up when it is morning then we can have more fun because mommy and daddy are happy and not soo tired.

He is almost 27 months old and i have been having this discussion with him on and off since he was 18 months old. Usualy his sleeping gets messed up when he is teething or has a cold or some such thing. i have learnt not to let him repeat the waking up for more than 3 nights otherwise it seems to be harder to get him back to sleeping through the night.

Also, I slowly weaned him from a full milk bottle to a water only sippy cup over a number of weeks so that his tummy could adjust to not having food during the sleeping time.

Hope I haven't rambled on too long.

C.

T.,
I bet you feel like the meat in a sandwich, being chewed both ways. Husband is a bigger problem. You know what to do for the child. she needs to hear that she cannot have milk in the middle of the night and that it is sleep time. "Not now, bedtime" until she gets the picture. You need him to get on board so your stomach doesn't churn with fear that he is going to get up and make things worse. Perhaps do it on a Friday night when there are no work constraints? If he can't figure this out, then he (and you) have bigger problems than the 22 mo. old.
RE: the pacifier. The mom who suggested limiting it to the room, naptime then bedtime is right on. If this child is having sleep problems, I wouldn't worry about the pacifier right now. Straighten out one problem at a time.
Good luck!

I know your going to receive lots of great advice from all the moms out there and since my daughter isn't of that age yet I don't have anything valuable to add in that department. However, I just can't help but put my two cents in about your husband getting mad at everyone because he was woken up. Did he expect to get full nights of sleep when ya'll had kids? He needs to suck it up and stop making it harder on you while you're working on fixing this problem with your daughter. Tell him to sleep on the floor or like another lady put it, send him somewhere else for a few nights. Sounds to me like you're playing to your daughter AND to your husband.

Maybe I'm off base. I hope I am. Good luck!
Jen
http://www.mommysjoy.com

The best way to get your child to stop waking up all night is to stop responding to it. Every time you go in & give in to the undesired behavior, your reinforce it. I learned this quickly with my son when I stopped responding to his negative behaviors. He realized that my husband and I did not support what he was doing, so he eventually stopped since it there was no more reason to wake up. I recommend waiting until a weekend to work on the change (if no one works then) and explain to the rest of the family that there may be a few days of your daughter crying, but you are all working together to help her and everyone else get better sleep and you need their support.

What to do? Simply state to your daughter that "it is "night night time and everyone is sleeping. Please go back to sleep". Leave the room - let her scream. If she gets out, just walk her back to her room & put her in bed. Repeat as necessary. Do not give her milk - she doesn't need it at night and it is bad for her teeth. You could leave a sippy cup of water next to her bed instead and explain that if she is thirsty, she can drink that. If she is still in a crib, hang a cup holder on her crib to put the sippy cup in so she knows where to reach it. She will continue to wake up as long as you go in there, but it should only take a few days for her to get the message that no one is catering to her demands once you stop doing it. I had the same thing happen with my son, so I completely understand this situation. He is 2 1/2 now and sleeps all the way through the night (and he is in a big boy bed and could get out if he wanted to). He has occasionally gotten out of bed not long after we put him down, but we ignored him (we were downstairs & he was upstairs w/the gate at the top of the stairs) and he eventually went back to his room on his own when he realized that no one was paying attention to him.

Best of luck to you - just be strong for a few days and I promise you it will pay off!