at about 2 y.o., we quit nursing cold turkey and bed-time was the hardest. my dh put her to bed the first few nites... then i did and just stuck with a routine... ours is brush teeth/ wash face/ 2-3 books/ lullabies/ bed. she fussed quite a bit the first few nites... and i would go in and comfort her, but not get her out of her crib. it took a week probably... but she does wonderfully now.
i think the most important thing is to decide once and for all how you will deal with bed-time... it sounds like you are ready for a change. decide how to deal with it. (i'm sure you're getting alot of suggestions)..... and STICK TO YOUR GUNS!!! do the same thing every nite... and although it might take up to 2 weeks for your ds to realize this is the new plan... he'll get it!
ALSO, give him extra snuggles/ book reading/ mommy/daddy time during the day to make up for the lesser snuggles at nite... he needs your love still!
HTH
darci