Naming a Child as Executor in Your Will

Yes.
It exacerbated already bad blood between me and a particular sibling.
My mom is still alive and my sibling views every interaction I have with my mother as jockeying to increase "my share".

Because, siblings battle.
Especially at times like that.
It can get, real ugly.
Even if, while the parents are still alive, and the "kids" know who the Executor is, versus the other siblings. And all the siblings will want to know WHY... that sibling was chosen over the others.
But it needs to be, known.

I told my mom I'd be her executor, but only if she removed me from inheriting property. (She wanted a 4-way split) I told her I didn't want to co-own anything with my siblings because it would be a pain in the neck for me. Also that she needed to explicitly list people by name and state exactly what they were to receive. That way there could never be any inkling of a misunderstanding.

If the child is under 18, I don't think they can be the executor.

I also know a family where one sibling was made executor and did not distribute to the other siblings as was specified in the will. Long story short: It got messy, and some of them are no longer speaking to each other. This was once a very close family. It's a real shame. I would ask you not do that to your children.

You just need a responsible, trustworthy person. Preferably, one who lives near by, would be helpful.

It's a lot of paperwork for months and then hard feelings if another sibling feels the distribution wasn't right.

So if a child isn't trustworthy or doesn't want the hassle dont do it.

sure. if you've got a kid who's not good with that sort of detail, or there are jealously issues that will create drama, or your kid is already overwhelmed with life details and can't take on that degree of responsibility.......
there are lots of reasons.
khairete
S.

An Executor acts for you after your death, since you won't be there to dispose of your own money and possessions.

If naming one child for the job would cause a problem within the family - and the very thought of wills and inheritances brings out the worst in some of the nicest folks! - or if no child could be counted on to do the many jobs of an Executor, it would only be sensible to name someone else - perhaps a professional who would do the work correctly and impartially.

And don't be afraid to do that, either. It's the decision of the individual making the will, and some grown children would be tickled pink to know they didn't have an Executor's responsibility.

You also want to make sure your will says exactly what you want it to say, and doesn't say anything you *don't* want it to say, before you put it in the hands of an Executor.

As long as they are at least 18 at the time the will is drawn up.

Also, you should have agreement of all children over the decision. For example, I am a twin, and oldest of 4. My parents ask me and my twin to be co-Executor. My twin said no thanks.

My Aunt named her daughter the executrix of her will because she was the responsible one. Everyone in the family agreed that she was the best choice. When my aunt died, her daughter did not like some of the terms of the will and refused to give certain people things that my aunt wished distributed. Small things that weren't worth people hiring attorneys for, but sentimental value is a big deal. She made a complete mess out of the sale of assets and her brothers ended up having to threaten to sue her to get her to finally settle the estate. It was a huge mess, it ruined her relationship with her brothers and it hurt several of my aunts long time friends. In hind sight everyone now agrees the responsibility should have been given to a neutral party. My aunts wishes would have been followed and my cousins would all be on speaking terms.

SH says it as I do. When parents are terminally ill, out comes bad behavior. Hire a neutral professional person, not a neighbor, not a church member but maybe one of your former co-workers who knew NONE of your children.

The best reason not to name a beneficiary(assuming the child will also inherit) of a will as the executor is that there is less potential for family drama. If you have good reason to believe that all of the beneficiaries will be happy with whatever they receive, if everybody gets along nicely and always has and your family is not prone to drama or fights over material things - I think it's fine.
But in most families there is potential for drama when someone dies and leaves behind a considerable inheritance. Relationships that seem fine turn sour really fast and some families will find themselves in long drawn out court battles or mediation that leaves relationships beyond repair. If there is a considerable inheritance involved it would be better to choose an impartial executor like and attorney, even if you are going to have to pay a fee - or at least a family member that can handle possible family feuds.
Good luck.

Depends on the siblings. In my dad's family, he's the oldest of 7. For a while he was the executor but that didn't make sense because he has another brother who lived 2 blocks away from my grandparents, was involved in their day to day life, is financially responsible, intelligent, detail-oriented, very ethical and business savvy. So this uncle became the executor long before my grandmother passed away last year and has done a marvelous job of handling her estate professionally and fairly.

In my family, I am the executor for my parents (I have three living siblings) and it makes sense because I am the oldest of the children who lives in state and I work in finance. My older sister would have done fine with this - she runs her own business - but lives out of state and was relieved to not have this responsibility.

If none of the children is qualified to manage the disbursement of an estate (accurate accounting skills, filing taxes and court documents, selling real estate) or if there is bad blood among the children, it makes sense to hire a professional. I know of several families where the executor was fair, competent and transparent but some other bitter adult child with issues constantly harassed the executor, accused him or her of being unfair, dishonest or incompetent, etc. If a parent knows that one child will cause problems, it's best to avoid that with an outside person.

Being an Executor to a will is a lot of work. If you have an estate that has the money, hire an attorney. If you do chose a child, make sure you have a trusted attorney that can assist with the matter. Probate can get very messy. An attorney can sort out the legal aspect of everything.

I will be as honest as I can. My mom passed away a few years ago and my brother got every thing. The house, the checking accounts, the furniture, everything there was.

She had dementia and he signed on her house papers that he lived there as a co-owner.

My husband had an aunt that was very wealthy. She had let it be knows that she was including her nephews and nieces in her will. So when she passed away last year her sister was named the executor. It has been so easy, they all got exactly the same amount of cash, got to say if there was anything in particular they would like to have, it was up to the executor to decide, and they even have money invested for a couple of years to make sure if there are any bills that show up there will be money to cover those costs.

So we were able to have a chunk of money and not have any hard feelings what so ever due to every one being completely equal.

Go with written instructions and a person you completely trust that will be overseen by your attorney so they will have to be accountable for every item and every penny.

I think it would depend on the child. If you think they are responsible enough I don't see a problem with it.
My father was the executor for his mom, my grandmother. He wasn't even the oldest of his siblings. But we were all in the same city and had been caring for her while she was in the nursing home.

Depends on the child and the relationship they have with their siblings. Take the time to understand all that is required to be an executor, it is quite a responsibility. Then, honestly ask yourself if they are capable and willing to do so. And if the relationships are tenuous with siblings, this is something that drive a wedge between them. People rarely think clearly when death is involved.

But if the relationships are strong and the child is capable, no there isn't a reason not to.

I think it really depends on the situation. My husband is the beneficiary on his mother's accounts because she knows he's the responsible one. He (we) would make sure things are taken care of and done as she wishes. Even his dad had made changes adding hubby to his insurance policy (jointly w/ his mom but she didn't know it). In that case, we were left with NO instructions from his dad and his dad passed.

Some families, this is not wise because of greed and such.

I think that the average family, it is ok to name one child as an executor as long as you know they are the reliable one and will be transparent with their actions. Anything less should be joint executors or an independent person.

It depends on the child. Some people don't want the responsibility and some people can't handle it. It can also cause conflict if you only name one child and not all children.. My crazy aunt was pissed when she wasn't name executor of my gram's will.

under 18-wouldn't trust.
over 18-sure.

I had consulted the lawyer at Seigman, Starritt-Burnett & Sinkfield, PLLC and they said that you can name more than one person to serve as an executor and if co-executors are named in the will then all of them must act in unison. They all must:
1. Apply to have the will probated.
2. Make all decisions unanimously.
3. Sign property deeds and titles for transferring assets, and
4. Sign for the estate’s financial accounts, investment accounts, tax returns, and any other paperwork.