My Son Never Stops Talking!

Updated on October 31, 2006
A.B. asks from York, PA
14 answers

My 3 year old son never seems to stop talking, he even talks in his sleep! I also have a 1 year old daughter, she's so quiet compared to him I don't even see how they're related to one another. I've tried putting on his favorite movies, playing cds, leaving the room, everything thing I can think of to try and get a few minutes of peace and quiet during the day, but between the jabboring, questions, noises he makes, and the toys noises by 5 or 6 at night I'm counting down the minutes until I put him to bed. I feel like a bad mom, but at times it feels like I could loose my mind if the talking doesn't stop. I love kids too. Taking care of my own children and others children when possible brings me so much joy. I love to see them smile and laugh and to know that I make them happy, but some days it all just seems to get under my skin. Any ideas on how to get a little quiet time? Does this happen to anyone else?

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So What Happened?

I'd like to thank everyone for all of their advice. I'm going to try some of the new suggestions I hadn't thought of yet and hope that the ones that I've already been doing start to work. lol. I hope. Thank you all so much. :-)

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M.F.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Sounds familiar. I too have a very talkative 3 yo. He's a firstborn, and i just think that's the way of it. We do little contests on who can be the quietest (guess who wins). I send him into another room (his own to play or the den with the train table) for a few minutes peace, but he takes it as a punishment rather than a mommy need, so I don't send him off too much. Just take a deep breath and leave the room when it gets too much. My son still knocks on the door, but at least there's a buffer ;)

M.

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J.L.

answers from Philadelphia on

My suggestion? Get some children't music and maybe he'll learn the words and sing, instead. Other than that, maybe a book where they read to you and he has to sit there and follow along. Let him know he can't talk during this time or he'll not only miss the story but the sound that tells you when to turn the page.

I thought chatters were only girls. I have two girls (24 years and one that is 5 years). Both have always been little chatters like this. Recently, my little one has starting singing, and it's so cute!

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K.E.

answers from Reading on

My 4 year old had a motor mouth pretty badly at that age. To get a few moments of peace for myself, I'd let her call my mom or my mother-in-law and talk their ears off for a while. To keep things to a minimum in the car, I would give her a lollipop.

Is he newly 3 or an older 3? Does he like to draw? If so, set him up with a few sheets of paper and some crayons and tell him to draw a story for you. He puts one picture on each page and then tells his story to you after he's done with 4 or 5. Tell him you'll leave the room until he's done so the story is a suprise. That should be good for a couple of minutes! This may be a little beyond him if he's newly 3.

I found that once my 4 year old learned to read a little bit, the energy that had been used to talk non-stop was re-channelled into figuring out how to pronounce written words. Don't get me wrong though, she's still a talker! I thought that was a general girl thing, but maybe not.

Best of luck,
K.

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M.M.

answers from Washington DC on

i know how you feel i have 3 kids now 10,7,4 my 10 year old son when he was little never shut up i wanted to tape his mouth shut but it stopped at 5 ther is hope i promise now to hear his voice i have to go start conversation with him

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S.M.

answers from Allentown on

My son is a talker too - and if he is talking to me and I dont respond he says "Talk to me mommy Talk!!" ARGH!!! Mommy doesnt feeling like talking LOL I have no suggestions but just wish you much sanity b/c I know we all need it!!!!

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C.J.

answers from Philadelphia on

A.,
I have a 3 1/2 year old boy who never shuts up either. lol. He wakes up and before his feet hit the floor I can hear him talking either to his stuffed cow he sleeps with or the dog. It drives me CRAZY. Unlike you I am NOT a kid person, though I am really good with kids. I love babies and have all the patience in the world but as soon as they turn 2. they drive me crazy. I mean I love my boys with all my heart but sometimes usually everynight I am pulling my hair out wanting just 5 minutes to read a book or even use the bathroom alone. Don't feel like a bad mother because you can't wait for your kids to go to bed. Everyone goes through it. There isn't a mother out there that can say she loves to hear her kid talk none stop for 24hrs. a day 365 days a year. She would be lying. Everyone needs a break. Which is my sugestion. My mother-in-law takes my kids almost every Sat. night so I can have time alone. It does wanders if you know you are going to get a break, it helps with the frustration. If you don't have anyone to take him maybe try a daycare program for a couple hours a day or couple times a week. They have one at the YMCA which is fairly inexpensive. Don't feel guilty since you are a stay at home mom (I am too)your son needs to interact with other children anyway. If that isn't an option maybe do playdates with other small children. If he is talking to someone else and you have someone else to talk to it might be less stressfull.
Good luck,
C.

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D.M.

answers from State College on

I had to laugh when I saw this because it reminds me so much of my oldest son who is now 15. We tell him he started talking when he was 9 months old and has never been quiet since! On the bright side, he has turned out to have great verbal skills which have helped him out in school, he is taking a speech and debate course and aceing the extemporaneous speeches. Also he still talks non-stop to us even though he is a teenager so I feel really lucky he still wants to communicate with us. I do have to say, when he was 3 I did enforce a daily quiet time in his room, either a nap or just playing alone for a while, and I also asked my husband to take him along on errands so I could get a break. Good luck!

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S.F.

answers from Philadelphia on

MY SON HAS ALWAYS BEEN A TALKER TOO. HE IS NOW 8. WHEN HE WAS YOUNGER I WOULD GIVE HIM BOOKS AND TELL HIM TO READ THEM TO ME. HE ACTUALLY LEARNED HOW TO READ BY 4 BECAUSE OF THIS. NOW AT THE AGE OF 8 TO GET HIM BACK FOR NOT GIVING ME MY QUIET TIME. I WILL WAIT UNTIL HE IS DOING SOMETHING HE IS REALLY INTERESTED IN--THEN I WILL GO UP TO HIM AND ASK HIM QUESTION AFTER QUESTION UNTIL HE IS ALMOST IN TEARS ABOUT WANTING TO CONTINUE WHAT HE WAS DOING(LOL) I KNOW IT SOUNDS MEAN BUT HE NOW THINKS TWICE ABOUT BOTHERING ME DURING MY QUIET TIME.
GOOD LUCK!!!

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H.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Haha - I think it's the age!! My daughter is the same way. My son's only 17 months younger and has gotten a head start on the talking from copying his big sister. I completely understand about it being so neat to hear the amazing language and to know what they are thinking, but after a while you just can't take any more and need a few quiet minutes. Do you have a space that you and leave the kids - or at least your son alone for a short time and go to another part of the house for a little sanity? You could take a break when he's watching a favorite show or is busy playing happily in a safe area. Be sure to let your son know where you will be and that you are going to have a little "Mommy time" and he needs to watch his show or keep playing and you will be back very soon. Perhaps taking a 5-10 minute break in the morning and afternoon would be enough to not get too overwelmed. Are you able to get any quiet time during nap time? You could take a cup of tea and have a magazine or book there to look through for a couple adult moments of quiet. Even just going to fold laundry or laying down for 5 minutes is nice if it's quiet. You son will learn to entertain himself for a bit and you'll enjoy a little escape. You know your son and what things he may be tempted to get into so be sure you check the area he will be in to make sure he will be safe there alone before leaving. Wishing you a few quiet minutes!

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K.D.

answers from Reading on

I am a Nanny of a 3 year old, and he does talk alot, it's the age, but constant and non-stop talk may mean he is over stimulated or has had too much sugar, not enough one on one eye conact type attention. It couldn't hurt to ask your pediatrician, he may have a sensitivity to sugar or food coloring that hypes him up.

I think the quiet time or nap time is invaluable and will be difficult to enforce at first but they need that still at this age. My boss has decided to forego this in favor of an earlier bedtime, but everyday between 11 am and 2 pm he gets so cranky and it's only tiredness. They will still need 8 to 10 hours of sleep at night, so this theory isn't really working, but she's the boss ;-)

Anyway, I hope and pray you get some peace.

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K.J.

answers from Philadelphia on

I wish I had an answer...I need one too! My daughter, 3, is the same way! Car rides are a non-stop chatter from the back seat, play time, breakfast, lunch and dinner it's all the same. If she is not talking directly to me she is making her toys talk (sometimes she just uses her hands) or talking to just about every person who walks by her! Sometimes it does get irritating, mostly when I am trying to hear the news or take an important phone call, but the rest of the time it is very amusing! And I always know when she is getting tired because she gets very quiet! Maybe they should get together! At least then we could have a break!

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C.Z.

answers from Philadelphia on

Agh, I have the same problem! My son is 3 1/2 years old and i have a 4 month old baby girl. My son NEVER stops talking, if he isn't talking to me, he's talking to his toys or singing a song. He takes at least an hour to eat because he is talking so much and that's a quick meal where i'm yelling at him to stop talking all the time. It's nice that he has the verbal skills, but it drives me nuts!!! It doesn't help that my daughter has colic or acid refulx issues (and she's a brat that always wants to be held). Recently i have started Mommy time-outs... my son has to play in his bedroom or the basement by himself while mommy has some time to herself to do whatever. He earns tv time this way. He's getting a little better and can do it for up to an hour. Even though, i still count down the minutes till he's in bed and the question can stop. If you find anything else that works, please let me know! You aren't alone!!!

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K.

answers from Harrisburg on

A.,
I hate to tell you this but it only gets worse!!! I have 2 kids, ages 10 and 6. They are both major talkers and it's constant, I mean CONSTANT!!!!! I wish I had some great piece of advice for you but I'm afraid all I can give you is an understanding ear and I'll pray for patience for you(which is what I pray for everyday!!!). Just keep your chin up and get little tidbits of quiet whenever you can. Your 3 year old is old enough to understand when you say to give you some time, say when you're in the bathroom, and not to bother you thru the door. I know this sounds crazy but hey, you gotta try everything you can. Even in the car, have "quiet time" since mommy is concentrating on driving. Sorry this probably isn't much help, but I'm afraid it's all I got. Good luck and you're not alone!!
K. B.
P.S. I used to sell Pampered Chef too.

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L.W.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi! My daughter is 3 and she talks non-stop, too. She has been this way since even before she was making actual words. One thing that helps me keep my sanity is that I put my daughter down for a "rest" period every day (she doesn't want me to call it a nap anymore). Anyway, after her lunch she has to retire to her bed. She is allowed to take a quiet activity such as a book or a stuffed animal. I don't care if she sleeps or not, but she is not allowed to get up until rest is over. Usually this is for about 1 1/2 hours. If she falls asleep, fine. If not , fine. Also, when she is up and I find I really need a break I tell her sometimes that Mama can't talk right now and we need to have quiet time. If she insists on talking, I tell her to talk to her dolls, stuffed animals or toys. This all works pretty well. Not all the time, but most of the time. I try to teach her that she has to respect other people's time. Also, this will help her when she goes to school next year. Good luck. (smile)

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