He doesn't when he's not real drunk. Why does he do this and how do I stop it. I'm tired of this. He's 47 years old. I've told him that he's doing it. He says I didn't know I was. My carpets are ruined. What can I do to keep him from doing this
YOU CAN CHANGE THE LOCKS AND NOT LET HIM IN.
I've never yelled a first sentence before. Wow. But boy do I mean it. I really hope this isn't a real post...
If he had a dog doing this, the dog wouldn't be allowed in till trained. He can't come over if he does this - plain and simple.
Personally, that would be the least of my concerns (although disgusting) if he was an alcoholic.
Is he getting help?
He's an alcoholic.
There is NOTHING you can do to keep him from doing this besides not allowing him over.
Marry him!!! He's a keeper! And then you can have cute troll babies that pee all over the floor too! ***Pretty sure this isn't a "real" question friends!
welcome to mamapedia, B..
you can keep him OUT of your house. That's a good starter.
if he LIVES with you? you can boot his nasty self out of the house and NEVER let him back in.
He's an alcoholic. You can't change him. He won't change until he wants to change. DO NOT ALLOW him back in your home. EVER
This cannot be real!
Oh good lord... if this is for real, you need to use your backbone.
Why would you allow anyone to stay in your home and disrespect your home and you?
The sex can't possibly be so great that you justify allowing this behavior in your house.
Kick him to the curb, get some counseling for yourself.
Why would you put up with this? Why would you allow anyone to treat you and your home in this manner?
You must know you cannot stop someone who has a problem with alcohol or substances. You know there is nothing you can do to stop him, but you CAN help yourself.
You call him your "man friend," so I'm going off the assumption that you are not married.
If that is the case, that is good news for you because it is less complicated to go your separate ways.
You're old enough to know better. Old enough to realize that you should not spend your life like this.
If you need strength and support to help you with this, please go to an Al-Anon meeting. You will find people there who know exactly what you're going through.
Save yourself. That's what you can do.
He's an alcoholic! There is nothing you can do to change him. How could he stop when he doesn't remember doing it. That means alcohol controls him. Even if he wanted to stop, he can't. Take up the carpets and put down linoleum.
Why are you with him? Why do you allow him to do this? Perhaps you drink with him. Apparently, being drunk is OK if he would just stop urinating on the floor.
Dump him is a good option.
No alcohol at your house is another option and don't let him come inside if he's been drinking.
He's an alcoholic and he's in denial and there is NOTHING you can do for him until he realizes that he HAS a problem and actually WANTS to do something about it.
This is why dumping him is probably your best option.
His alcoholism is not a problem that you can fix - he has to deal with it - he's not - and he might never.
And it's disturbing that you've put up with this long enough for your carpets to be ruined.
You should have dumped him LONG before that happened!
A clean carpet vs a man who's not house broken (when drunk, which has got to be a lot of the time)?
Carpet wins - man needs to be gone.
Quit living in a kennel where no one but you cleans the cage.
That's just nasty.
Visit him at HIS house. Let him ruin his own carpets.
Just accept him as he is. Pee on the floor along with him. Good Lord! Really???
Are you standing there watching him urinate on your floors? Gross...stop letting him in your house.
You have kids, right? How can you allow them to be near a raging alcoholic that is out of control? This isn't a good situation for any of you. If he has no home, give him two choices. You can take him to a rehab center or to a homeless shelter. His choice!
Don't let him in your house.
You said 'man friend' and 'my house' so it sounds like a platonic friend who does not live with you.
Don't serve alcohol when he is visiting and don't invite him to your home after he has been drinking. Make sobriety a condition of spending time together in your space.
What you see now is what you are going to continue to get unless he chooses to start rehab. You don't have the power to change anything about him, but you can control your own actions and set boundaries to prevent issues like this one.
Pull up some videos pertaining to that so that you'll have something to show him of his actions while he's drunk videotape him while he does that and show it to him when he's sober that may help you good luck and God bless you
Why does he do this? Because he can't control his bodily functions when he's drunk and he doesn't care enough about you to not get drunk.
What can you do to keep him from doing this? You can tell him to get into a rehab program and get sober or find another lady friend.
The first time anyone with less than four legs and over the age of two pissed on my floor would be the last.
I was married to an alcoholic. Unfortunately for him, when given the choice between me and the bottle, he chose the bottle.
When you are involved with an alcoholic you either have to get over all the nastiness that comes with it or get rid of him. He is having blackouts since he isn't aware of what he is doing. Since you are on this page it means you have children. You have to decide what you want for your children. Your children are watching this. There is nothing worse than a drunk. If he doesn't want help then this is what you and your children will have to put up with.
The only way you can keep him from messing up your carpets is to put him out. When he's drunk he is not aware of what he's doing. I guess you can follow him around with a bucket so he can pee in that instead on your carpet. Yuck!
If he's not aware of what he is doing when he blacks out I hope peeing on the carpet is all he will do. Sometimes they can become violent. As an adult you have made the decision to be with a drunk. The problem is your children have to deal with your decision. He may be a good man but this is too much to deal with. You have to decide if he is worth having around nasty peed on carpet and all.
He either sobers up or he's not welcome in your home. That would be something that is completely non-negotiable in my life.
If he was willing to go to rehab and sober up I would support him from a distance, not in my home.
Check him into rehab. He is an alcoholic, and it is most often problematic when this kind of behavior happens. He cannot control his bladder. So, unless you want to keep steam cleaning carpets-either check him into rehab, or kick him to the curb.( preferably to a detox facility)
You need to develop a backbone.
Are you living together? If not, he can't come in your house. Period. Change the locks if you have to. If you are living together, (or even if you are not) go to Al-Anon and find techniques to deal with an alcoholic, to set limits without enabling them. I think taping his behavior might be an effective weapon in showing him what he's like, and perhaps encourage him to seek treatment. Also make an accounting of what he's spending on alcohol and figure out what percentage of your income/savings is going toward that. But go to counseling to figure out why you put up with this.
And frankly, I've never heard of an alcoholic doing this on a regular basis. I think there's more going on that you haven't told us.
If he won't seek treatment, you may need to think about why you find this fellow so attractive and whether you want to continue this relationship.
Is this real?
What can you do to keep him from doing this? REALLY? What do you think you should do to keep him from doing this? Common sense says to NOT allow him in your own and NOT serve him alcohol.
If he doesn't know he's doing it, he's blacking out when he drinks which can be very dangerous. I think you need to tell him to find another place to live. It is not healthy or safe for you and your kids to be living with a raging alcoholic.
