After, he texted her 2 kissy (lips) emojis. He thinks I am crazy to think something is going on, but he is giving me nothing, offering no explanation or anything. What would you think? Am overreacting if I think he is having an affair?
Tell him you are so pleased that he's decided to have an open marriage and you have a boyfriend - several - on the side too.
send a fake co-worker a text with a throbbing heart emoji and 'i can't wait to see you again' and show it to your husband. tell him you're sure he won't mind under the circumstances.
khairete
S.
First of all, how do you know? Are you checking his phone? Then you already don't trust him.
He's telling you that you are crazy? Then he's gaslighting you and disrespecting your feelings.
The affair (if there is one) is secondary, actually. The big huge glaring problem is that you two don't respect or trust each other, and you don't know how to communicate with each other (or at least he can't with you) without hurting and insulting.
Counseling. Now. If he won't go, fine. Don't nag or beg or coax. Go by yourself. Get some support and some clarity on this.
Meantime, don't have sex with him until you are positive he's not having an affair and that he doesn't have any sexually transmitted infections.
You are not over reaching at all. I would be extremely pissed unless it's someone you know and know it's totally platonic on both ends. I have guy friends that I tell I love them but no kissy face emojis. But the ones I tell that are more like family than friends.
So your husband would be totally fine with you texting another man to say you love them with the kissy lip emojis. I think not!
He’s been caught cheating and his explanation is that you’re crazy...google “gas lighting.”
Best of luck! He’s sounds terrible...he can’t even own up to what he has done. 🤦♀️
My sister says there is nothing wrong with the kissy emojis, she sends them to friends (both male and female) and she says it doesn't have to mean anything romantic. She responded with that explanation to me because a single dad texted me one a couple of weeks ago, which freaked me out, so I didn't respond. She said it didn't have to mean it's anything romantic. She may have a point. The "I love you" though would definitely concern me, unless they are very close and have been friends for years, but they are co-workers, so I think it's more than just that, what co-workers say that to each other?
The fact your husband is accusing you and trying to make you feel like you're out of line instead of discussing your feelings, reassuring you, and offering to stop the affectionate texts is a bad sign that he isn't taking your feelings into account. If someone accused me of doing something, I'd want to prove that the person is mistaken and would go out of my way to explain it and prove it, if it's someone I love and whose feelings matter to me. I would want to clear my name. I would not just ignore their concerns and make them feel they are out of line. If he sees this is a big deal to you, why isn't he trying to reassure you that it's innocent or telling her that their exchanges need to be toned down because it's disrespectful toward his wife?
You're not overreacting. He's having an affair.
L.
Welcome to mamapedia!
So tell me - HOW did you come to know this? Are you checking your husband's phone and e-mails?? WHAT? HOW? Or did he tell you - oh geez - guess what stupid thing I did??
Do you TRUST your husband or not? If you don't? Why are you with him?
If you don't trust him - hire a private detective to surveil him for a few weeks. IF you don't trust him?? Check his e-mails....see what he is sending out...and check his facebook messages...and check all his accounts to see where he is spending money.
Bottom line is you don't trust your husband. YOU need to make a decision - to confront with evidence and divorce or confront and see what you can do to make your marriage work for BOTH of you.
Sounds fishy to me for sure, and if you felt the need to check his phone I am guessing your gut was already telling you something was up. And him telling you you are crazy rather than dealing with this very real issue (even if there is no affair sending kisses and I love you over text is an issue in and of itself) is not okay, he is gaslighting you which is another red flag. I would suggest counseling for you both, but if he won't go you still should.
Even if its not a physical affair, he is in love with her. He loves her. This is bad...you are not overreacting!!
Ok, let's pretend he is totally innocent...which I don't think so. So, do you send texts to eachother and does he say 'I love you' at the end of your texts? Perhaps a habit he confused with the note he sent her? And now, if that's not the case listen to the other women here and look up 'gaslighting'...and I am really sad for you because it is really difficult to deal with things like this. How did you come upon it? Were you looking at his texts? Does he leave the phone available for you to do so? Then back to the 'maybe he is innocent'...but if he hides it and you had to go find it under the plant in the living room and he completely forgot to delete it well then, back to listening to all the other mamas here...it is painful but well worth further investigation and a visit to counselor with or without him.
You are not overreacting.
Text your male coworker a note about "meeting for lunch tomorrow" with an eggplant emoji. Because, vegetables.
You are not overreacting. The "I love you" seems like the worst part, in context. (I could imagine some situations where that phrase would not be such a big deal, like someone laughing at a great joke at work and saying "haha Bill, you're hilarious, I love you man", while laughing at the joke, but that does not sound like the text you describe.)
Uh no if my husband said that he would be on the street. not over reacting at all.
