My Boxing Baby

I was told once that when babies hit, it's a sign of affection. Eventually, you'll have to help them find another way to communicate that. Hang in there! :)

Hi C. - this is such a hard one - they just dont seem to get it sometimes! Here are a couple of different articles for you to look at. Both of them contain strategies to deal with the behavior. If all else fails, there is the "law of the jungle" - eventually someone is going to hit back! :)

http://www.thelaboroflove.com/articles/how-can-we-stop-ou...

https://www.akronchildrens.org/cms/tips/fc019399ca28ce61/...

This response is a little late, you may already have found sufficient advice. However, my oldest son now 3 1/2 started with pulling little girls hair or boys that had long hair, he was just very interested in it... then he started hitting (which I think started for a combination of reasons) His enthusiasm for playing and not understating what he was doing and he was around a child who hit him (it didn't bother him but I think he observed the behavior realized the behavior gets attention pos. or neg. and it stuck) We dealt with this problem about a year and now finally the past 6 moths have been SOOO much better. We tried so many things, including time outs, taking things away, making him say sorry, teaching and practicing soft behavior, ignoring him but addressing the situation by taking him out of it and putting him by himself for a few min (trying not to make the hitting get the attention he might have been seeking)and more discipline and on and on... we tried EVERYTHING and EVERYONE had something to add... which we tried but so many things did not work he would still randomly and unexpectedly hit, not to be mean... but more like a reaction to lots of stimuli or being really enthusiastic in what he was doing or cause and effect exploration... However for us these two things were very helpful one trying to replace his responses of hitting with something else like clapping his hands so instead of hitting trying to teach him to clap his hands instead and the second when he would hit or if we could see it coming we would have him give a high five to them instead. For us our little guy needed some larger outlet and he chose hitting so we needed to replace it with an acceptable behavior. It was not easy and did not come over night but these two things along with him learning over it seemed to work.
I will say to all of you out there that have not dealt with a child who hits or some similar behavior go easy on us other moms, we are trying our hardest and don't have the magic button that will all of a sudden change our child's behavior. Other than trying to help my little guy express his feelings appropriately the hardest thing was dealing with others who were not understanding about the situation. we are not teaching our child to do this and for heaven sakes wish your child was not being hit... but making the situation a big deal and stressful only makes the problem worse. I believe it took my son longer to learn and outgrow the behavior because he needed peer interaction to learn what was right to do and see how other kids interacted... but me being embarrassed and others not understanding made his peer interaction more limited.
So C. don't worry about everyone else, focus on your little one and what she needs and what works best for her... and also stand up for her, my son was not hitting to be mean it was a lot of other things, don't let people treat her like a bully, all you can do is say sorry and hope others will be understanding. I hope your phase of dealing with it is much shorter than ours, good luck!

The only way your child will know what it feels like to be hit, is to hit them . Not only will this give them the shock factor they need, but also the pain and saddness.
It sounds so brutal, but if the shoe was on the other foot and another baby was hitting yours you wouldnt say ...it just a phase. No no no you would be so angry. This is the beginning phase of the terrible two's and if you dont nip things in the bud then your child will be the one everyone else wont invite. This is called tough love. Good luck and god bless

the articles posted are awesome! I enjoyed the read and got some good ideas myself. one thing that has worked for me that I didn't see specifically in the article...my dd doesn't like to have to sit in her car seat--so when she isn't listening at a friends house or even at the restaurant I've taken her out and put her in her car seat until she was ready to listen and talk about what had happened--
GL

Like you said, it's a phase, but I'm SO GLAD you're explaining how it makes the other children hurt and makes them sad. This is how we teach compassion, and children who fail to learn compassion are monsters. I literally stay as far away from those children in my neighborhood as I can--I fully expect them to lie to their parents about me, my family, etc. because they often have no conscience either. So thanks for doing the right thing!

This can be frustrating for you. As someone pointed out, like anything else, they need to learn not to hit. There are MANY ways to do this. We had luck with stopping the behavior when she was hitting, then doing what you are and explaining that isn't appropriate, then asking her to show us "gentle touches". We practiced with dolls and ourselves - modeling the behavior and asking her to do the same. We also rewarded her verbally with praise when she did show "gentle touches" to her toys, friends, dog. You have to watch for these, but try catching her doing the right thing and reward it. This provided the positive reinforcement and attention. Worth a try.

Give her an appropriate outlet.

"No! That girl doesn't want to play that game. Do you want to play rough? You can play rough with daddy when we get home, but not with that girl. Should we play rough? Let's go punch a pillow/the bed/the floor....or stomp our feet".....

There are 2 reasons to hit
1-for fun
2-to show anger

if it's to show anger, say: "no. we don't hit. ever. do you feel angry? Sometimes when mommy feels angry, I stomp my foot like this and say 'I angry'"...etc

You can't just say no. Teach her what she can do.

I have the same problem. She's at an age in which that is normal behavior. But try being proactive and catching her before she acts. Redirect her. Take toys or privileges away. She's a little young for timeouts to be effective, but I would keep doing timeouts... as she gets older... the timeouts will work better. She's too young to understand lectures. Just firmly and loudly say, "NO! Hitting hurts. Hands are not for hitting." There is a book titled Hands Are Not For Hitting. It's a children's board book by Elizabeth Verdick. She's probably hitting because she is frustrated. At her age she has limited vocabulary to express herself. So work on her... "Use your words." And help give her the vocabulary to express herself. Model the behavior you want to see. My son is almost 3 and he is still aggressive, which worries me. So, I'm having him evaluated. I don't think you're at that point, yet. It's good to ask others for advice. It wouldn't hurt to ask your pediatrician. Good luck. After reading the other responses, I wanted to add something. Crista said something about other children in the neighborhood who don't have a conscience. I'm not only a mom, but I'm also a public school teacher. Her attitude towards these children only makes the problem worse for these children. These children are acting out for a reason. I don't know if they have a conscience or not. Children have to learn that. If their parents aren't doing that... then the "village" needs to do that. I truly believe it takes a village. Don't treat them like the plague... they need to be shown some compassion. If the kids continue to be isolated... they learn nothing and act out more. Yes, protect your children, but remember these are KIDS we are dealing with. All children need to be shown some love. I speak from experience. There are a couple of moms who have responded angrily to me and my son because of his undesired behavior. One, it's not my fault my child is acting this way. Just like it's not your fault your child is acting this way. Two, for the most part, I don't believe children are naughty by nature. They don't know better until they're taught better.