I have a 3 month old and a lot of questions about her sleep.
The first question I have is my 3 month old does not take long naps unless I am holding her. She is a very light sleeper during the day and it is hard for her to get a good nap in. By the time evening comes she is very tired and cries a lot. Usually I end up holding her for an hour so she will take a nap and wake up happier. What can I do? It is hard for me to get anything done while holding her.
My second question is, at night we have established a bedtime routine. I put my 3 year old down and then I rock my 3 month for a while until shes quite sleepy and put her in her crib to fall asleep. She will sleep from 8:30pm until 3:30 or so which is great! However she will then wake up every two hours after to eat until 7:30/8am when she is up for the day. I would love to find a way to eliminate the second waking at night (around 5am)Also during her feedings at night I keep things very dark and calm and quiet yet after she is done eating and I lay her back down she begins to get a bit fussy and wont keep the nuk in her mouth (which helps calm her) and she will grunt for 20 min until finally she falls asleep again. Is this normal, is there anything I can do?
Lastly, As of now she sleeps in a bassinet in my room, I have thought about moving her into her crib. The problem comes that I have only two bedrooms and I have a three year old who also wakes easily. I am wondering how other parents work with sharing rooms with baby and toddler?
What I did with my boys, was I changed their diaper and got them naked if I had to at 10:00 every night. While I watched the news I fed them. They both slept the night through at 3 weeks old an a month old. I am talking from 10:30 until 7:30 every night. I breast fed most of the time, but did use formula occasionally.
My daughter was the same way with the cat naps during the day. I figured I'd get a little something done while on maternity leave, nope! But glad she slept well at night! My best purchase was a Babybjörn front pack carrier (off eBay to save a few $). She'd fall asleep in that and I was often even able to put her down in her bassinet later after sleeping awhile in the carrier. The other back-up was a swing. In fact, for the first few weeks of daycare, that was about the only place they could get her to nap as well! I know there are mixed opinions on doing that, but she got her naps and I kept my sanity!
I agree-you need to read "Healthy Sleep Habits Healthy child" by Dr Marc Weissbluth. Everything you need to know is in there! The book changed my life. Good luck!
Hi M.-
My advice:
swaddle
white noise
and these books:
Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr Harvery Karp
Becoming Babywise
Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child
Our first daughter sounds like your 3 mo... and a big part of it was that we were missing the 'window' to get her down for a sleep!!! Healthy Sleep habits discusses that!
Happiest Baby talks about swaddling and white noise-which is how we got our daughter to calm down and sleep!
With our son (7 mo) we've done Babywise- talks about getting full feedings in so they sleep better...
All 3 books were great for us! Good luck!
I can't tell you anything about poor napping...both my kids napped well. However, I also have a husband who works nights, and I do have a 22 month old and a 6 month old sharing a room right now, so I can tell you how I did that.
My youngest slept in a bassinette in our room until he was about 3 months old. He was also waking in the mornings...around 3 am and then at 5 am for the day. (I start work between 7 and 8 am, so getting up at 5 am worked for me.) I was having a hard time sleeping with him in my room after 3 am because he also took a while to settle back down and get back to sleep. (He also grunts and squirms around a lot when I lay him down until he drifts off...some nights it's only a few minutes, others it takes 20-30 minutes.)
After some trial and error, I'll tell you what has worked for us. After dinner (around 6:30 or 7 pm), I take the 6 month old upstairs and do his bedtime routine...bath if he needs it, pjs, story, sing a lullaby and rock him till he's sleepy then lay him down. Meanwhile, my husband is finishing up dinner with my 22 month old. If he's still sleeping (I don't know what time your husband sleeps during the day, but mine is sometimes early, sometimes later.), my 22 month old will watch a movie while I put the 6 month old to bed.
I then come back downstairs, play and clean up with the 22 month old and bring her upstairs for her bedtime routine around 7:30 or 8 pm. We brush her teeth, bath if she needs it, pjs, read stories (in the same room where my son is sleeping...it's amazing what they'll sleep through, I thought he was a light sleeper too) and tuck her in!
It took some time, but after several weeks, he was sleeping through the night consistently. Even when he would wake up in those early morning hours, my daughter would keep sleeping...I don't know how she could some days when he was screaming, but she did!
They both get up between 5:30 and 6:30 am now.
I think he and I both slept better once we were in separate rooms.
I know how hard it is to be the only one pulling the overnight duty with your kids. I was very sleep deprived for a while, but it does get better! Good luck and God bless your family!
My boys (twins, now 7 months) tended to do the same thing around that age - sleep for a long period (5-6 hours) and then nurse every two hours until they were awake for the day (around 5 or 6 in the morning.) Which is why, for better or worse, I ended up nursing in bed because if I didn't I would be in the nursery all night and I had to get up for work in the morning. I think part of the reason they were waking so often was because they were sleepy and didn't nurse that long (I honestly lost track) but mostly I think it's just because they were growing so much. This is a tremendous time for growth. Just remember this is phase and it will pass. She will sleep longer eventually. Personally I would keep her in your room a while longer so everyone else in the house can sleep. Just keep telling yourself that this is your "special time" with your daughter that no one else can share. It too will pass, and way too quickly. Good luck!
Hi! My 1st daughter did this too. Naps were 20 minutes tops - it was awful! I worked from home and couldn't get anything done at all.
I found a site called www.thebabywearer.com and I can honestly tell you, it changed my life! I bought a pouch carrier and she would nap in it for hours while I worked. I moved on to different types of carriers and my favorites are mei tais. It's a simple square of fabric with shoulder and waist straps that you tie on with the baby in. I use it now with my second when I'm trying to clean or shop and she's as happy as can be because she's close to me.
Eventually, my 1st outgrew needing to be held while sleeping and started napping in her crib. I'd guess by 5 months she was napping consistently in her crib. Also, do you swaddle? Both my kids slept so much better swaddled so I did it for naps too!
As for your other ?, My 6 month old does the same thing. She sleeps great until about 4 and then is up every 2-3 hours. I just started getting her up on the 2nd wakeup so that probably doesn't help!
Dear M.,
As a mom, I can certainly relate to how challenging sleep issues are.
As a child and family therapist, and consultant to Early Head Start, I am happy to tell you that there is hope!!!
One great resource is "The Sleepeasy Solution", which was developed by two other therapists that live across the country from me! Check them out at www.sleepyplanet.com.
Help is on the horizon!
Best,
W. :)
This sounds exactly like what I am going through right now. My baby is 3 1/2 months and he does not nap well at all, he will only take little cat naps. Then at night he wakes up about 1:30, at about 5:30 he is up for the day. But the whole napping situation sounds way too familiar. He is in daycare now and the provider seems to do really well with him so he isn't crabby at night, but I don't know what her trick is. I don't have any suggestions for you but I had to respond because when I was reading it sounded way too familiar!
ok well, babies dont sleep well, so be glad that she sleeps at night as long as she does! this baby sounds completely and totally normal! :D thats the bad news :P
babies have TINY tummies, about the size of their fists! they fill up fast and then they empty fast because in the first year, your baby will DOUBLE her height and TRIPLE her weight. this is the ONLY time (you hope) in her lifetime she grows at this rate. that requires a LOT of food! so your best bet is just to feed her when shes hungry, regardless of what time it is. there are several timmes during the first year where baby is going to need to eat more to get through a growth spurt, and you need to remember to work with that! you are the only expert on her, you just follow your instincts mama!
babies cant tell time, and they certainly arent laying there at night thinking about how they can screw with you. babies just cry and fuss to express a need and get that need fulfilled. dont ignore it - NEVER ignore it! babies who are quickly responded to when they cry actually cry LESS than babies who are left to cry it out for any reason.
keeping things dark and etc is a good idea, but make sure that baby gets burped well after a night feeding. you can burp her, then perhaps put her on her back and rub her tummy and pump her legs like shes riding a bike... to see if any gas passes through. other ideas are lying her across your lap to burp her - the pressure on her tummy helps push the gas out, also, lying her on a heating pad might also work.
as far as the sleep issue, i only have one son, but he still sleeps in his crib in our room. its really helpful to not have to go all the way down the hall to get him, and i hear him right away when he wakes up instead of him having to get to the point of screaming before i get to him. it helps him get his need fulfilled, and it helps him get back to sleep quicker and easier since he didnt have to get worked up. your baby can stay in a bassinett until she starts rolling over, or until you feel like she is big enough for it to be unsafe. then you could try a bedsharing idea (its safer than you think!) or cosleeping (with her in the same room in her own sleep space).
www.askdrsears.com is a good place to go for more info on sleep and etc. sleep gets tricky! good luck!
you can write me and ask questoins any time!
