Any suggestions would be so helpful. My daughter will be 5 months on the 25th of this month. Here is my problem. She will not takes naps during the day unless I am holding her. I have tried everything. Here is the weird part. She goes to bed awake at night and talks herself to sleep without crying. She goes to bed between 6:30 and 7 every night. Wakes up between 5 and 6 takes a bottle and goes back to sleep normally until at least 8. But she will not take naps during the day unless I hold her. I have tried putting her in her crib to sleep before she gets too tired and I have also just let her cry. Saturday I was just going to let her cry and after what seemed like forever I walked into her room picked her up. She put her head on my shoulder and she was out for two hours on me. Yesterday I thought maybe she likes the noise during the day so I left her downstairs with us and laid her down and the second I did she was awake. Daycare is having the same problem. What do we do????
UPDATE:
I first want to thank everyone for their suggestions. Some new things were brought to my attention. We do put her down in her room for nap in a dark room. I lay her down awake too. She will cry FOREVER and I mean like an hour and still will not fall asleep. I have no problem letting her cry, but I know when she gets to a point that she will not fall asleep. Yes we started solids at 4 months. My doctor suggested it because she is a BIG girl. She weighed 18.10 and was 27 inches at her 4 month check up. This has always been an issue and did not just start. Daycare too puts her down awake. I start about an hour and a half after she wakes in the morning to have her take her morning nap.
What a difference between the two weekends. My daughter took two naps (2 hours each nap) in her crib. The first one was easy to put her down, but the second not so good. I decided to just let her CIO while I vacuumed upstairs. Within one minute of me doing so she feel asleep on her own. Today she is on nap number two and has fallen asleep on her own too. I want to thank you all for your suggestions. They are working =) We moved her bedtime from 6:30 to 7, which seemed to really help. Daycare is also having success with her taking naps there as well.
My neighbors had this problem with their little girl. Great night sleeper, hated naps. Her first day in daycare, the woman watching her said she took two great naps. When her parents asked how she did it, it was simple: Darken the room. Worth a try?
I followed the advise of the Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child book, because I had twins and couldn't NOT have them sleep. That book was a godsend. My now 7 year olds are amazing sleepers, and have been since they were 4 months old (when I read the book out of desperation!) They napped 2x per day at very regular hours for a long time, then down to 1x and then none, but they always were able to sleep on their own after I followed the suggestions in the book.
Good luck!
thought i'd pass this on...
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M.,
Keep a journal of her feedings, how much and at what time, sleep and wake patterns, any unusual or illness symptoms. You will start to see patterns emerge.
One thing is I notice you said is, when you laid her down she woke. You don't want to get her used to sleeping in your arms, and then try to lay her down. You want to lay her down when it is nap time, she is awake, and she should be tired. You need your care provider doing the same. Let her get used to the routine, if that's the routine you desire. Babies will get used to being cajoled, walked, and hugged to sleep, and as they start getting older the sleep "problems" will start arising.
That's fine to hold a baby through sleep in cultures where they strap the baby on their back all day and night and go about thier business. If you are not prepared to do that you should start training her to sleep on her own now.
It might be possible she may need an extra bit of feeding before she goes down again in that second nap in the morning-
If she goes to bed at 6:30 pm and wakes at 6am that is a long stretch without feeding. So it is possible that you need an extra feeding before the second morning nap. I have done that at times with my babies. I would think at her age, she should be tired enough to be down again by 10 or 10:30am. In fact, after she wakes and the feeding is given, the next cry to come out of her mouth will be either be for sleep, or a bit more food and then some sleep.
Have you started solids yet? If you have, it could be possible that is an issue? I would be careful starting solids before 6 months.
This may not be the best habit to form but have you tried laying down with her until she falls asleep and then scooting out? I had to do that with my first son until he got used to sleeping alone.
Good Luck!
Try the "No Cry Nap Solution" book which is a compassionate alternative to CIO. I've also done the lay down with her and then roll away which has worked. I also just learned how to transfer her to the crib after she falls asleep in my arms - from the book I've suggested. I was having problems of her waking up every time, but using the techniques suggested in this book, I was able to put her down last night and this morning without her waking up! I was astonished! And, best part - no crying!
The Baby Whisperer website also has good suggestions and more immediate information since it's online. www.pantley.com is the website for the "No Cry Sleep Solution" author and has some good info as well.
Good luck!
M.
It's as if I'd written this posting myself! I have a 5 month old little girl and had the same issue. She slept wonderfully at night...but wouldn't nap at all during the day unless I was nursing her...and then continued to hold her after she'd fallen asleep. Not sure if this applies to you or not....but my little one had colic and reflux...and we'd do ANYTHING to get the crying to stop and get her to sleep...and...in doing so, we taught her some bad habits...and we needed to break them for her own good. After doing much reading about sleeping and napping, I tried everything...all the soothing techniques, routines, etc....and nothing worked. So....last week...I bit the bullet and had her cry it out. It was hard....and I was an emotional wreck....but I needed to let her learn the skill of falling asleep during the day on her own. The first day and first nap, she cried for an hour and 15 minutes....then slept for 45 minutes. The next nap that day she only cried for 25 minutes. Each day got a little better. She now cries (a mild fussing cry) for 5-15 minutes when I put her down and will sleep for 30-45 minutes. The naps aren't that long, but based on my reading, that should get longer as she gets older (in her case, with colic and reflux, the ability to nap develops later). I use Marc Weissbluth's book - Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby....if you get it, it's a little wordy. But each chapter has a summary section that contains all the main points...can't recommend that enough. I know that you have tried the crying it out...and you might have done this...but make sure you use a clock to time the length of the cries....I can tell you, those first couple of days, 5 minutes of my daughter crying felt like an hour! If you try this and it doesn't work, it could just be that she's not "mature" enough to get the napping thing yet...since each baby develops at their own speed...so just try again in a couple of days, weeks...whatever feels right to you. I noticed that you have an older girl too - and I'm guessing you're in the same boat I was in...didn't have any of these napping issues with the first. Just hang in there - it will get better! If you need help or want to swap strategies, feel free to send me an e-mail!
Liz
I am wondering if she falls asleep so easily in her crib at night because it is dark? They may not be able to accomodate this at daycare, but maybe you could try putting her down for a nap in a dark room and see if that helps. My 2 mo. old doesn't nap that well during the day, but same as you, I can put him in his co-sleeper at night with the lights out and just a night light on and he coos then falls asleep on his own. During the day he enjoys LONG naps if we are holding him, but not if he is in his pack & play - maybe only 15 minutes. I have noticed if we have been somewhere in the car and we bring him in the house in his infant carrier with the sunshade thing pulled down, it is kind of dark for him and he will stay asleep in there for about 2 hours. He also likes sleeping in his swing - for some reason he enjoys sitting up in a reclined position. That is something you might try too. Good luck.
my daughter is 6 months old. she has the same night sleeping schedule as you but also takes 2-3 naps during the day. I learned her sleepy times by watching her & noticing her tried signs-slowing down, not as active, rubbing her eyes, getting fussy. & then I began the schedule based on these times. At her age now she is tired every 3 hours so I begin my soothing process @ 2hrs 45 mins. I do the same process every time, bottle, soft blanket on her head/face, rocking right after the bottle so she gets tired, pacifier in mouth (only @ this time-not during wake times) & she gets sleepy within about 5 minutes, I put her in the crib tired but awake & she is out in a few minutes. Was it always like this-NO. up until 2 weeks ago she took all her naps in her swing & I rocked her to sleep everytime & put her in her swing asleep & she would sleep in there 1-3 hours a few times per day. When I moved her to the crib for her naps for the first time (she sleeps in a cosleeper @ night next to my bed) she cried the first 3 days-more crying than sleeping but I let her try herself for those days, left her alone (cause when I went in she got more upset) & after an hour whether she slept or not the nap was over & I would try again @ her next nap period. On the fourth day she went to sleep on her own. Took 2 half hour naps 2 per day for a week & then following week the naps have turned into an hour & 2 hour naps. SO I had to take the control back from her & teach her the way it was going to be. All babies will get used to whatever you do to them it just take time & a strong parent to deal with the cring & days of less sleep for you both. The Dr. told me that it usually takes a week to get them on a new routine. At 5 months she won't remember what you do now in a week from now if you start a new routine & stick to it the same every time & doing it now is going to be so much easier than even a month from now....Some key things I do to create the environment for her, leave a bathroom fan on -near her room to help diffuse the noise in the house, I bought black out sheets so the room is pitch dark-Dr. told me to do this-works perfect, have a heart beat noise machine in the crib & a lovie with my perfume for her to smell & hold.
I hope this helps. It's consistency & stamina from you. You tell her what to do-don't let her tell you. It's hard but we have to take the control or we will never be able to take care of ourselves. Let me know if any of this works. Hang in there
oh my gosh - this was my daughter!!! I couldn't get her to nap not on me for the first 5 1/2 months. Finally, my mom suggested I put her in the crib with a lovey and that seemed to do it! Now, at 7 months, we put her down with the pacifier and a lovey and play the crib aquarium and she'll go to sleep when it's done playing (6 min). Good luck! I used the Marc Weissbluth book and the SleepEasy Solution.
