My 20 Month Old Won't Eat, Any Advice??

Updated on March 19, 2008
D.W. asks from Sacramento, CA
7 answers

My daughter has been going through this for 2-3 months now! She barely eats. Even if she likes it, she will only eat a little if at all. I've tried giving her different choices or none at all. Healthy or not. Nice about it or strict. I am so frustrated i have to walk away now. Please any advice or good, quick food ideas!

Much appreciation!

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L.H.

answers from Sacramento on

my oldest daughter was like that when she was younger.Its called being picky,lol.I dont like it either cause to this day she still is very picky.I've asked other moms and doctors and they all say,they will eat when they want to eat.They won't starve themselves.It takes some getting use to.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.M.

answers from Sacramento on

Hey there, I have one of those. At 20 months they're changing so much mentally and physically, heres what I was told. Number 1, growth is slowing in comparison to the first 18months. They ened less food. Number 2, they have realized that meals come in regularly scheduled intervals. There's another one coming later and right now I'm busy. ALSO, independence is being developed. A strong will is a great trait, but difficult in a toddler. She'll be a leader, but for now, get her to eat. Theres a great book called Raising your Spirited Child. I got it at barnes and noble. Has good insights and tips and understanding.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.M.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi- Just wanted to recommend that you limit drinks throughout the day, and, if she gets a bottle still, wean. Some kids will drinks all there calories so they can keep going and play, etc. But the nutritional quality will be poor when it comes to meals/snacks because the child is not hungry due to the drinks. Many parent think "Well at least she's getting juice/milk/etc", and this can become a negative loop if not monitored. I'm a dietitian that works with children and families, and this is a common issue with similar aged kids, so your not alone :) Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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I.G.

answers from San Francisco on

Don't worry, kids eat when they are hungry. My son does the same thing. What I do to make sure he gets something in his tummy is I make him fruit smoothies. I put a couple of table spoons of plain oatmeal, a table spoon of flax seed, a dash of vanilla, bananas, yogart,and any other fruit that will make it tasty. I always taste if first to make sure it taste good. I hope this is helpful.

1 mom found this helpful
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D.S.

answers from Stockton on

When she's hungry she'll eat. I know its frustrating and my daughter goes thru it from time to time. If you are worried she's not getting enough nutrients or is underweight call her pediatricion. Good luck!

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L.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi D.,

If there is nothing wrong medically with your daughter, she will not voluntarily starve herself. I am always inclined toward checking with the doctor or advice nurse if I am worried about my daughter's eating. My daughter is tiny (14 months and 18.5 bs) but she is loaded with energy, walking, sleeping ok, climbing, and otherwise healthy, so she is fine. I just keep offering her things.

My lactation consultant, Tina at Kaiser, is awesome. She has shared with me great info and resources about eating and feeding all through my daughter's life (my baby is now 14 months). She told me about a great book by Ellyn Satter, "Child of Mine....Feeding with Love and Good Sense". I have had many years in recovery myself around food issues and I loved breastfeeding because it was such a no-brainer and my daughter was completely in charge of the what, when, and how much. Starting solid foods was a challenge because now there were all these decisions which involved me and I wanted my daughter to have a sane and healthy, pleasurable relationship with food. Ellyn Satter's expertise feels really good to my heart and has been very helpful in all areas of feeding my baby-turned-toddler.

In a very small nutshell, Ellyn recommends that you are responsible for what you offer and when you offer it and where you offer it; your baby/toddler is responsible for how much and whether. I like this idea that she calls shared responsibility...it replicates the dynamics of breastfeeding with solid food. Keep breathing and keep offering!

I have found this woman's expertise to be very helpful in navigating learning to feed my daughter. Surprise benefit is how much it is also helping me with my own eating! I was dismayed to be in charge of feeding a little person when I haven't been so much of a role model myself at times. I hope this helps you. It can be frustrating and confusing.

L. M.
Novato

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V.A.

answers from San Francisco on

I often have similar problems. What works is having somebody else feed her (like my nanny or my husband).

V.

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